Can Anyone Explain Bisexuality To Me?

Hello! Let's dive right in.

As many people will tell you, sexuality is a spectrum. Bisexuality especially so. For me, I accept all applicants. Everyone is sexy, and totally bangable. I just prefer the label bisexual.

Now, this doesn't mean that I'm super in to everyone all the time. As my name says, there is a cycle, and the gender that I'm attracted to will change on occasion. This does NOT mean that I'm not always attracted to my girlfriend, it's just that sometimes I'm really in to dudes. Or trans*dudes. Or trans*chicks. It changes. Which is a pain in the ass, but eh. Whatever.

This isn't helpful. Okay, so the same way that you're attracted to women, I'm attracted to everyone. I would be just as okay spending my life with a man as a woman, and anyone in between. It's not about being unable to decide: it's about not HAVING to, because you're okay with everyone!


I am SO sorry if this just made things worse...

 

If we keep to the agnostic comparison, I think I can explain it. When you're agnostic, you're unsure of whether or not you believe something supernatural exist, and exactly what supernatural things you do believe in. It's not a matter of choosing one or the other, it's a matter of having a middle ground until you're sure. Like, believing in both until one or the other seems more compelling, if that ever happens.

Bisexuality is not about not knowing which one you like, but rather, acknowledging that you like both things. Maybe the bisexual person later discovers they only truly like one of the genders, but maybe they also discover they like aspects of both genders.

I myself am struggling with whether I'm bisexual or a lesbian, and I've given up trying to find it out.

But it's not a matter of picking one, because if it was that easy, we most likely wouldn't have bisexuals at all.
Instead, try to view it as liking apples as well as oranges. One option doesn't necessarily exclude the other.


This turned out way longer than I intended. I hope it makes sense

 

Unless she's very young and still experimenting / figuring it all out, I don't think it's phases where she prefers either/or, but rather, phases where she prefers one more than the other. Being bisexual is just that; you like girls, and you like guys, and sometimes you want to be with a guy, while other times, you want to be with a girl. It doesn't mean you don't like the other gender at all.

 

It's actually phase. Nbd.

And yeah, that's pretty much it. Of course, it's different when you're in a monogamous relationship, but that's pretty much it. I like the example Berru uses with fruit. Some people like just apples, some like just oranges. We happen to like both.

 

As a gay dude I roll my eyes when straight guys drool at pretty girls. Chicks are cool but men are so sexy!
Bisexuality cannot be compared to be Agnosticism. Bisexuality is like liking both chocolate and lemon at once while agnosticism for me is like "Chocolate? Lemon? Meh. Seems interesting. Don't really care that much"

---------- Post added 3rd Jan 2016 at 12:55 AM ----------

How can you guys type so fast!

 

Those feelings you have toward the same sex are exactly the same as the ones we have for the opposite sex.


There. Done.

 

Well. Now I feel long-winded.

 

Agree with Kinky^ (except for the whole being a gay dude thing lol).

Another food example would be with coffee or tea. Do you like coffee or tea? Some people like coffee, some like tea, some like both. And some have a weak or strong preference for either coffee or tea.

For me it's kind of the opposite from you, OP; it's like, I don't entirely understand how you can be only into guys or girls. I understand logically that one can be like that but it feels so foreign and weird.

 

Gay, in broad terms, is generally used to describe men. Although some women prefer to be described as 'gay' as opposed to 'lesbian.' It is a personal choice, and varies depending on who you ask.

And by the broadest definition, yest. Bi can be said to be gay and straight, although that is a VERY VERY broad definition.

 

Gay: "I can't see heterosexual activity for me at all ... NO WAY! Not. Going. To. Happen."

Straight: (See above substituting homosexual)

Bisexual: Everything else

My point-of-view is that (almost) everyone has a hard-wired (pheromonal) preference, with the degree of psychological preference pushing the individual to whatever extent towards the "bi" center (switch-hitting, fence-sitting, wide-open Kinsey 3 zone).

 

I really like the like the responses Doug and Beruu made. For me I knew both were attractive since I was very young. The culture I grew up in made me feel awkward feeling attracted or doing things with the same sex even though it felt natural to me. When I look at life experiences with either sex it wasn't what was between the legs that drew me to the person but who they were inside.

I've been attracted to either despite being with one sex or the other. I've never lost the sexual interest in partner because hey I saw someone in public of the opposite sex that was attractive.

 

So asexuals are agnostics. Makes sense!

 

If you know it's biphobic, why are you creating the thread, when you could Google "harmful stereotypes about bisexuals"?

 

+1.

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Keeping to the apples and oranges metaphor: some people like apples, some people like oranges, and some people like both. The people who like both apples and oranges might prefer an apple over an orange sometimes, and that's that. Just because you only like one of them doesn't mean everyone has to like just one.

 

Think of it like this.

Stranger: Do you like boys or girls?
Bisexual: Yes.

 

I mean, I didn't find this terribly offensive. Someone had questions, they didn't know things, so they asked. Isn't that the whole point of this website?

 

You find attractive who you find attractive. It really boils down to who you fall in love with-my best friend from high school is bisexual and she's married to a man. A friend of mine in college is bi and he's with a guy.