I've been having a really hard time figuring out how to break things off in my current hetero relationship. I've been confused and going back and forth about when and how to tell him. I'm really scared of everything that will come after that discussion, too. But last night I had a dream, and I think it's going to really help me through all of this. I dreamt I was in a tiny apartment kitchen, galley style. There was a window at the far end. I can't remember what I was doing, but it was warm and I was wearing some sort of sun dress. I turn around and my girlfriend is there (whoever that is). And she has on a sun dress, too, and has long dark hair. We're laughing together, and I sit on the counter pull her close. We stay that way, kissing, hugging, playing around... But it wasn't a sexual dream. I was just so happy and so at peace. I remember her making me feel like the best me. And every time I think back on that dream, I yearn for that feeling. It's something that I've never felt in any relationship, that I think I'm ready for now. It's giving me courage and the motivation to end something that is safe. And it's not just that I deserve to feel that way (although I do), it's that he deserves that feeling too. I can't be so selfish, to stay in something that is safe, and deny that feeling to both of us. Deep breaths... I don't know when I'm going to go through with this. But I do know that I can do it.
You can do it, and the fact you think about his right to happiness should make you proud of yourself. Onions might be delicious, once you get used to them, but as you cut them, you make others cry. Just go, she is waiting at the other side.
