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Is being LGBT+ a major or minor part of your identity?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Schloss, Apr 12, 2016.

  1. Schloss

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    Time and time again we have this issue revolving around LGBT+ circles and it seems everybody has a different perspective. I don't know which one is right, but I do know that it's necessary to have some introspection and definition on where you stand with regards to your identity.

    I've come across people who say that their sexuality/gender identity is a major part of their identity, because:
    1) being reclusive and silent about your identity is another way of staying stuck in the closet.
    2) not having your issues discussed on an open table with your wider community may breed ignorance and misunderstanding.
    3) visibility is important to dissolve stigma.

    On the other hand, you have people who say that sexual orientation/gender identity should only play a minute role and must not be that important, these people usually contend:
    1) being loud about your identity can provoke unnecessarily harmful reactions
    2) identity is an extremely private matter that must not be paraded around for self-gratification purposes
    3) that it is necessary to be confident about one's identity to not have the need to be too overt and loud about it

    where do you all stand?
     
  2. Invidia

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    First of all, I fiercely oppose anyone who would claim that there is one correct stance. It's all up to the individual in my books.

    That said, no, it is not for me. Nowadays not at all, really.
     
  3. springroll

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  4. Lyr

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    I agree with all the points of the second category, I do not say that I hate people who express themselves, but in the depths of me this irritates me if they make it to brag... maybe I am just really closed compared with others..
     
  5. OutofZCloset

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    By the way I wanted to say...I love your orientation status....gay and recruiting. That is awesome!!! Years ago I would have had a problem with that but now I whole heartedly support it. I am also a recruiter in the sense that I want as many gay people to be "out there" to pave the path for young gay people to follow. Years ago I saw it as something to keep personal. Keep it to yourself don't flaunt it. Don't make the straight people uncomfortable so they will be more accepting. But as I've gotten older (I'm no longer a baby gay) I believe we need to be seen holding hands or walking arm and arm in public. The more straight people see that they will become desensitized to it and they'll stop staring. The more gay kids see it they will feel more comfortable to do the same. The more we are out there the more our numbers will grow and then eventually no one will feel shame to hold there girlfriend's hand in public.

    So even though my wife and I don't "Look" gay. It is a major part of our identity and everyone knows we are because of how we live.
     
  6. Snoww

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    :eusa_clap:eusa_clap:eusa_clap loved what you said there! :grin:D
     
  7. alexandr

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    It's almost a non-existent part of my identity at the moment as both my sexual orientation and gender identity aren't known to anyone I know in real life (and I don't even really know for sure what my gender identity is). I don't live in an area known for it's LGBT community, although the area is moderately accepting and I have LGBT friends.
     
  8. SubZero

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    I'd say it's a minor part of my identity. It wasn't a huge deal when I first discovered I had same-sex attraction, and it still isn't. I haven't really disclosed this to many people, but I choose not to because I don't feel like it's necessary. If it ever comes up in conversation or if somebody assumes I'm straight, then I'll talk about it and correct them. Otherwise, I just live my life not really putting much emphasis on my sexual identity.
     
  9. Reciprocal

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    I'd say that being LGBT is a quite a large part of my identity at the moment, but I think this could change in the future as when I've transitioned as far as I want to go I will be just a straight man. But now, I am an LGBT person and I do hold this as important to who I am.
     
  10. andimon

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    It's not a big deal, but not being out makes you really wary of everything you say, so it plays an important survival role.
     
  11. guitar

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    I think it does play a very important part of your identity, whether you want it to or not. Now that doesn't mean you have to be a rainbow warrior, and you can certainly downplay your sexuality. But being LGBT immediately marks you as different. Sex and gender matters greatly in human relations. Who you marry, for example, (or if you marry) is seen as a major part of who you are.
     
  12. imnotreallysure

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    Well, I can't deny that it's a fundamental part of who I am, but there is no particular reason why being gay should forge my identity. Except finding the same sex attractive, it doesn't really signify anything. It definitely doesn't dictate who my friends are or what my interests are.
     
    #12 imnotreallysure, Apr 12, 2016
    Last edited: Apr 12, 2016
  13. theskylitup

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    Somewhere in between
     
  14. Chiroptera

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    I think it is important because i try to fight at least a bit for our rights. But, for my personal life, it is a minor part. It is something i really like about myself, but still, not a big deal.
     
  15. Alder

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    From a larger standpoint I've heard a lot of arguments from both sides; either emphasising that LGBT+ is a major part of one's identity and experiences, or arguing that it shouldn't be a big deal at all. I have varied opinions towards a lot of it on the wider scheme of things, and am rather uncertain where I stand, so I'll just come at this from an entirely personal perspective for now.

    Yes it is pretty major at the moment, and it is undeniably a pretty big part of who I am, even if it doesn't dictate my personality nor my interests/hobbies. But I can say that around this time in my life, being LGBT+ (first wondering if I was a lesbian or a bisexual girl, and now with figuring out I'm trans), has affected my life, emotions, and relationships with others in some pretty big ways. Though that may just be because I spent a lot of that time actively questioning my sexuality, then my gender (and I am still questioning some things now.) And questioning usually does take up quite a bit of time and effort.

    When it comes to being trans it is quite a major aspect of my identity and life at present day, because not only am I still figuring that out too, I also am planning/need to plan for the future, where I may need to (and want to) take some practical steps to get to where I want to be in regards to my gender, my body, and how I live my life. As being part of the LGBT+ as a whole does have some significant impact on parts of my life at the moment, I would say it's pretty major. But I don't know about in the future.
     
    #15 Alder, Apr 12, 2016
    Last edited: Apr 12, 2016
  16. Matto_Corvo

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    I guess I'm in between leaning towards major
     
  17. Irisviel

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    Major, since it's the source of the discrimination and prejudice I have to face in my life.
     
  18. Libertino

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    It's fairly minor, especially since I never even thought of myself as LGBT+ until fairly recently, and even then, I'm still a bit unclear about the label that applies to me (whether biromantic, demisexual, or asexual are even valid for me). That said, despite the fact that it isn't a big part of my identity, I have always been passionately in favor of LGBT rights, even before I ever thought I was part of the community.
     
  19. Secrets5

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    It's a major part of MY identity, but I don't go around making a big deal about it. An example: If I kiss in public it's because we're in a long term relationship and we're on a romantic night out - nothing 'political' or 'activist' about it. If someone sees us and that empowers them to kiss in public when they and their partner are ready, then glad I could help with that, but that's not my point. In terms of gender identity [or rather lack of] I'm not out yet, but in public I'm not sure there is anything I can do. People will see me for two minutes and then pass, not a big deal, they're probably more engaged about what they have to do than me or anybody else. Unlike sexuality, I will need to come out about being agender, and when that time comes, I'll try not to make a 'big deal' out of it, and rather just discuss it with the people who need to know. Or at least that's what I hope happens.
     
  20. the haunted

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    Right now it's pretty major, as I'm trying to figure out which transition steps I want to take. Being a "gay woman" (ugh) wasn't a major part of my identity. My identity as an artist, stoner, fuckboy, little shit is a much more major one :wink: