From teens to late 20s I had very short hair and I got called Sir a lot. I thought that this is odd because I'm 130 pounds and 5'2", and curvy. Recently I gave long hair a try decided I didn't like it and chopped it off again. I've got about 1/2 inch on the sides and about 3-4 inches on the top. Once this month someone called my sir in Walmart and yesterday two little girls looked at me in line at the dollar store and pronounced "you're a boy". I don't have a problem with this, but I think it's odd. I guess it's the short hair, because it didn't happen with long hair. Does this happen to other people with shorthair? I've never heard anyone else mention it.
When I was still in middle school, I had that JB/emo haircut, and I'd get mistaken to be a boy sometimes. And yeah, it happens a lot to girls with short hair. One of my straight friends who's a girl had something like that similar happen to her when she got her hair cut short. I think it's because when seeing a girl with really short hair (and I'm assuming you weren't wearing a skirt) people first think, "That must be a strange looking dude!" before they ever think "That's a gender non conforming girl!", which tells a lot about society.
When I was younger I got that a lot and I think a lot of it is body language. I would carry myself in a masculine way. As I've gotten older and into the business world I learned to carry myself differently. It's how you stand, how you walk it's everything about you. I had long hair even in my younger days so it's not just the short hair thing. Pay attention to your body language because that is what they are picking up on.
It's pretty common for Butches to be addressed so, but not Femmes. Many just assume younger gals with short hair are Sirs, I guess. Once you hit 30ish, they just think you are a professional woman in corporate. LOL
I will go out of my way to "properly" address people. If I see a person who looks like a man, they get "sir'ed;" if a person looks like a woman, they get "ma'am'ed." If they dress masculine, but have breasts, I will ma'am them. In my experience I think many people who are raised as ladies but end up being "butch" still carry themselves in a way that shows they are not "male by birth." Of course, as Lipstick Leuger said, feminine lesbians will probably have no trouble being perceived as women.
Thanks for the responses. It seems so odd to me that people put so much expectation into a hair cut that they can't tell what gender you are. Makes me appreciate gender neutral clothes for the expectations they take off kids. (And adults)
I wasn't called sir, but I have on a snapback, a baggy shirt, and my hair was pulled back, so a few of my friends said I looked like a dude. Which I agree that i did.
Ahaha, yes! All the time! I don't really mind it because the look on their faces when they realize I'm female is always funny. I tend to be mistaken for male because I have very short hair (also shaved it twice), and once when it got long enough to tie, I put it in a stereotypical-ish manbun. And also because I love to wear loose clothes which hide my (generally) flat chest and body figure.
In the past it happened a lot more but these days it's either ma'am or people just avoid pronouns if they don't know me. My voice usually tends to exacerbate the problem though.
I had longer hair over the winter(90's grunge, I wanna look like Kurt Cobain phase. Don't ask.), and once or twice I was referred to as ma'am from behind....the look on their face when I turned around and they saw my beard. :lol: I hate being called sir though. I'm not old enough to be a sir, dammit!
It happened with my sister a couple of times (she wears very baggy shirts), but I only had that mistake made when in full paintball gear with a mask. With younger children, they actually have to learn identifiers to work out biological sex in others, so many think 'short hair = boy', so even if you look extremely feminine, they'd think you were a boy. That actually happened to a friend of mine, who was unfortunately very sensitive about her looks...
I call everyone "Sir" when I feel like it is necessary. Girl or boy, I'll just say "Sirrr..." Mostly as a joke, though.
I actually got called Sir two times in the same restaurant... One of which was my waiter, who had a very awkward apology afterwards. It doesn't bother me too much, but I take not of what shirt I wore at that time and try to avoid it when I'm feeling especially girly. But yeah, i think it's the hair. I'm currently growing mine out, but when it was a short pixie cut, it would happen pretty regularly.
I've been referred to as the opposite gender twice in my whole life. Once when I was starting 1st grade in a new school. I was wearing a gender neutral sweater and the lady who cut my hair decided it would be hilarious to give me a bowl haircut. Immediately the kid behind me tapped my shoulder and asked if I was a boy or a girl. The second was when I was 15-16. I was at the park when some little kids walked up and addressed me as "sir". I was wearing a baggy hoodie and jeans, plus I had a hat on so you couldn't see my hair (was super long then) they also approached me from behind. When I turned around to answer them, they looked very confused, but I just rolled with it. Its funny, my niece thinks girl = pink and dresses. She also had gender pronoun issues when she was younger. So she'd ask if I was a girl sometimes. Her younger sister is a tomboy herself so she never hesitated to call me a girl.
Usually when someone calls me sir its followed by the phrase " You're making a scene." or "Put your pants back on."
