Gaydar? - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered people coming out

diegon3 · 26th Feb 2009, 04:55 PM

For the most awkward reason I remembered about the gaydar myth.
Is that believable cause if it does exist then mine is pretty much broken.
Does anybody actually know concisely who is gay at glance?

Larry Myster · 26th Feb 2009, 05:09 PM

Well, there is a way, but you will need to be really on your feet to tell. For me IT IS EXTREAMLY HARD to define if im gay or not, people think im straight at first glance because im not femanate, or am I just acting gay at all, if people ask I tell them I am gay. Easy as that.

Techcompu2 · 26th Feb 2009, 05:19 PM

we have had a few threads on gaydar before on here. you can find them by searching the word 'Gaydar'.

This link will take you to the search:http://www.emptyclosets.com/forum/se...d=663581&pp=25

MusicIsLife · 26th Feb 2009, 05:24 PM

3 guys where i work are gay, but they're all effemenate.

Techcompu2 · 26th Feb 2009, 05:27 PM

mine is based completely on stereotypes. of course the only lgbt person I know in real life is my older female cousin but I did not know she was a lesbian until I saw her myspace page.

Maggi · 26th Feb 2009, 05:35 PM

i'm pretty good at telling who is and who isn't at first glance, it's really weird.

Jeimuzu · 26th Feb 2009, 05:38 PM

Takes a bit of work to be honest, but it gets easier once you acknowledge that there's a damn sight more of us than the papers would like to pretend.

LyraLissa · 26th Feb 2009, 05:44 PM

I can sometimes tell at a glance- but more often once I get to know the person.
Not everyone has gaydar, and people have it in different amounts.
I've also found that the more out of the closet you are, the more gaydar you have.

~Hugs, Lyra

26th Feb 2009, 07:23 PM

I can tell with guys a lot of the time, but I second-guess myself because I feel like I'm judging them based on just a few observations. I really can't tell with lesbians unless they're the stereotypical butch type.

Emberstone · 26th Feb 2009, 08:07 PM

the introduction of metrosexuality through queer eye for the straight guy made it hard.

Peter · 27th Feb 2009, 01:48 AM

Considering that the statistics claim that between 8 and 10% of the population is gay, your gaydar works if it goes off for every 10 people you cross in the street. Otherwise, it is recognizing some preconceived attitude or just wishful thinking.
I met my niece a couple of days ago, she said she was travelling with a male colleague who had gone shoe-shopping. It didn't take a gaydar for me to smile and raise my eyebrows - yes, he is.

Amy · 27th Feb 2009, 03:35 AM

My gaydar is pretty amazing. It doesn't work on random people, but most I can tell instantly.

**Martin** · 27th Feb 2009, 04:07 AM

Hmmm, the concept of a gaydar is nothing more than a myth. They're based entirely on stereotypes and what people expect a gay person to look like (which in itself is moronic). We know from this site alone that there are people who will not fit any of the stereotypes, there are others who fit 1, two or three, and there are those who let their sexuality define who they are. The first group of people you wouldn't recognise as being gay if they randomly walked past you in the street, the second group you may pick up on depending how hard you're looking and the third group is sort of obvious, that's just stereotypical observation.

The idea of a gaydar is so convenient for a lot of people because there is no way to actually prove it. I've seen people walk down a mall and say "this person is gay" and so on, but they never actually go and ask them whether they are or not. They just make the assumption that their right and enforce the view that they have a good gaydar. They'll probably "detect" one or two people, but statistically in a busy mall more than two people you walk past will be gay. They just don't pick up on that because the stereotypes they look for aren't there, thus destroying their idea of having a gaydar.

There are also people who have gay stereotypes who are heterosexual (metrosexual?) and they'll be falsely identified as gay. Once again the idea of a gaydar is flawed.

I think gaydars can be a bit of fun when you're out and about and a bit bored, but anybody who actually thinks they seriously has one is a tad deluded, imo. It doesn't take a genius to spot stereotypes in society, and it's hardly enough to call it a "gift". It takes a bit of knowledge on stereotypes and eyesight. Something most people have.

Larry Myster · 27th Feb 2009, 04:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Martin

Hmmm, the concept of a gaydar is nothing more than a myth. They're based entirely on stereotypes and what people expect a gay person to look like (which in itself is moronic). We know from this site alone that there are people who will not fit any of the stereotypes, there are others who fit 1, two or three, and there are those who let their sexuality define who they are. The first group of people you wouldn't recognise as being gay if they randomly walked past you in the street, the second group you may pick up on depending how hard you're looking and the third group is sort of obvious, that's just stereotypical observation.

The idea of a gaydar is so convenient for a lot of people because there is no way to actually prove it. I've seen people walk down a mall and say "this person is gay" and so on, but they never actually go and ask them whether they are or not. They just make the assumption that their right and enforce the view that they have a good gaydar. They'll probably "detect" one or two people, but statistically in a busy mall more than two people you walk past will be gay. They just don't pick up on that because the stereotypes they look for aren't there, thus destroying their idea of having a gaydar.

There are also people who have gay stereotypes who are heterosexual (metrosexual?) and they'll be falsely identified as gay. Once again the idea of a gaydar is flawed.

I think gaydars can be a bit of fun when you're out and about and a bit bored, but anybody who actually thinks they seriously has one is a tad deluded, imo. It doesn't take a genius to spot stereotypes in society, and it's hardly enough to call it a "gift". It takes a bit of knowledge on stereotypes and eyesight. Something most people have.

I'll have to agree with martin. He praticly said the longer verstion of what i was sayen lol. But yeah really good.

Steve · 27th Feb 2009, 07:06 AM

i disagree i knew martin was gay from the moment i saw his profile pic!

DexterMorgan · 27th Feb 2009, 07:20 AM

Some of my familymembers knew I was gay before I did!

LyraLissa · 27th Feb 2009, 07:41 AM

True gaydar's rarely an on-sight thing.
But, despite me trying to hide, a friend of mine thought I was gay before I told her.
It is possible, but not foolproof.
~Hugs, Lyra

**Martin** · 27th Feb 2009, 08:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Steve

i disagree i knew martin was gay from the moment i saw his profile pic!

Well for a start, I don't have a profile picture.

You also know I'm gay because I'm using a support forum for LGBT peeps which displays the orientation of each user.

As I wrote I'm gay you have been able to deduce that I am gay, which you have cleverly done by not being a muppet and having the ability to read.

Steve · 27th Feb 2009, 08:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Martin

Quote:

Originally Posted by Steve

i disagree i knew martin was gay from the moment i saw his profile pic!

Well for a start, I don't have a profile picture.

You also know I'm gay because I'm using a support forum for LGBT peeps which displays the orientation of each user.

As I wrote I'm gay you have been able to deduce that I am gay, which you have cleverly done by not being a muppet and having the ability to read.

oh snaps he is on to me !!!!

riddlerno1 · 27th Feb 2009, 09:27 AM

well i cant personally tell unless someone looks stereotypically gay, and even then do u really know for sure??! Plus i dont think i look stereotypically gay so i wonder if people think im gay by first glance!

26th Feb 2009, 04:55 PM	#1
diegon3 just another human or am I? O_o Full Member Gender: thinks (ok so if it's..) yeah i'm a guy Orientation: thinks hummm definatly gay Out Status: imidiate family, and a few others Location: SEATTLE, WA Posts: 171 Join Date: Feb 2009	Gaydar? For the most awkward reason I remembered about the gaydar myth. Is that believable cause if it does exist then mine is pretty much broken. Does anybody actually know concisely who is gay at glance?

26th Feb 2009, 05:09 PM	#2
Larry Myster EC 4 Life! Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Extreamly Gayrific Out Status: Some people Location: Coos Bay, OR Age: 21 Posts: 153 Join Date: Jan 2008	Re: Gaydar? Well, there is a way, but you will need to be really on your feet to tell. For me IT IS EXTREAMLY HARD to define if im gay or not, people think im straight at first glance because im not femanate, or am I just acting gay at all, if people ask I tell them I am gay. Easy as that. __________________ Yep its me.

26th Feb 2009, 05:19 PM	#3
Techcompu2 EC Addict Full Member Gender: ♂ Orientation: ♂+♂=♥♥♥ Out Status: Most people, but I still activly hide it from some Location: Tennessee Age: 19 Posts: 659 Join Date: Nov 2007	Re: Gaydar? we have had a few threads on gaydar before on here. you can find them by searching the word 'Gaydar'. This link will take you to the search:http://www.emptyclosets.com/forum/se...d=663581&pp=25 __________________ "C'mon, Cody. You're acting like an angry evil mutated chipmunk that just had it's sword stolen." "If a fudpucker could puck fud, how much fud could a fudpucker puck if a fudpucker could puck fud."

26th Feb 2009, 05:24 PM	#4
MusicIsLife EC Addict Full Member Gender: Not even sure anymore. Something in between. Orientation: I like girls :) Out Status: Everyone on orientation 7 people on trans issue. Location: Montréal, QC Age: 23 Posts: 1,595 Join Date: Dec 2007	Re: Gaydar? 3 guys where i work are gay, but they're all effemenate.

26th Feb 2009, 05:27 PM	#5
Techcompu2 EC Addict Full Member Gender: ♂ Orientation: ♂+♂=♥♥♥ Out Status: Most people, but I still activly hide it from some Location: Tennessee Age: 19 Posts: 659 Join Date: Nov 2007	Re: Gaydar? mine is based completely on stereotypes. of course the only lgbt person I know in real life is my older female cousin but I did not know she was a lesbian until I saw her myspace page. __________________ "C'mon, Cody. You're acting like an angry evil mutated chipmunk that just had it's sword stolen." "If a fudpucker could puck fud, how much fud could a fudpucker puck if a fudpucker could puck fud."

26th Feb 2009, 05:35 PM	#6
Maggi art addict Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Gay Out Status: my parents & at school, but not extended family Location: Illinois, USA Age: 19 Posts: 122 Join Date: Feb 2009	Re: Gaydar? i'm pretty good at telling who is and who isn't at first glance, it's really weird.

26th Feb 2009, 05:38 PM	#7
Jeimuzu Wreck Cognition Full Member Gender: Heterogametic Orientation: Rawr. Out Status: 99% out. Location: Middlesbrough Age: 23 Posts: 1,744 Join Date: Aug 2007	Re: Gaydar? Takes a bit of work to be honest, but it gets easier once you acknowledge that there's a damn sight more of us than the papers would like to pretend. __________________

26th Feb 2009, 05:44 PM	#8
LyraLissa Member Regular Member Gender: Female Orientation: Flamboyantly Lesbian Out Status: Even the polar bears got the memo. Location: The frozen north Age: 18 Posts: 65 Join Date: Feb 2009	Re: Gaydar? I can sometimes tell at a glance- but more often once I get to know the person. Not everyone has gaydar, and people have it in different amounts. I've also found that the more out of the closet you are, the more gaydar you have. ~Hugs, Lyra __________________ If homosexuality is a disease, let's all call in queer to work. 'Hello, can't work today. Still queer.'

26th Feb 2009, 07:23 PM	#9
Drizzt DoUrden Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Gaydar? I can tell with guys a lot of the time, but I second-guess myself because I feel like I'm judging them based on just a few observations. I really can't tell with lesbians unless they're the stereotypical butch type.

26th Feb 2009, 08:07 PM	#10
Emberstone Flappychap Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Oregon, USA Age: 28 Posts: 5,587 Join Date: May 2008	Re: Gaydar? the introduction of metrosexuality through queer eye for the straight guy made it hard.

27th Feb 2009, 01:48 AM	#11
Peter Just a guy Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Anyone who is interested Location: Milton Keynes, England Age: 56 Posts: 474 Join Date: Oct 2008	Re: Gaydar? Considering that the statistics claim that between 8 and 10% of the population is gay, your gaydar works if it goes off for every 10 people you cross in the street. Otherwise, it is recognizing some preconceived attitude or just wishful thinking. I met my niece a couple of days ago, she said she was travelling with a male colleague who had gone shoe-shopping. It didn't take a gaydar for me to smile and raise my eyebrows - yes, he is. __________________ Peter "God leaves us free to become whatever we like. We can be ourselves or not, as we please. We are at liberty to be real, or to be unreal. We may be true or false, the choice is ours." (Thomas Merton)

27th Feb 2009, 03:35 AM	#12
Amy DFTBA Full Member Gender: Somewhere between female and I don't know Out Status: Open, not out. Location: Northern California, United States Age: 18 Posts: 2,380 Join Date: Jul 2008	Re: Gaydar? My gaydar is pretty amazing. It doesn't work on random people, but most I can tell instantly. __________________ "The opposite of love is not hate, but fear" Forrest Church

27th Feb 2009, 04:07 AM	#13
Martin EC's Red Queen EC Admin Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Some people Location: Merseyside, UK Age: 21 Posts: 8,046 Join Date: Nov 2007	Re: Gaydar? Hmmm, the concept of a gaydar is nothing more than a myth. They're based entirely on stereotypes and what people expect a gay person to look like (which in itself is moronic). We know from this site alone that there are people who will not fit any of the stereotypes, there are others who fit 1, two or three, and there are those who let their sexuality define who they are. The first group of people you wouldn't recognise as being gay if they randomly walked past you in the street, the second group you may pick up on depending how hard you're looking and the third group is sort of obvious, that's just stereotypical observation. The idea of a gaydar is so convenient for a lot of people because there is no way to actually prove it. I've seen people walk down a mall and say "this person is gay" and so on, but they never actually go and ask them whether they are or not. They just make the assumption that their right and enforce the view that they have a good gaydar. They'll probably "detect" one or two people, but statistically in a busy mall more than two people you walk past will be gay. They just don't pick up on that because the stereotypes they look for aren't there, thus destroying their idea of having a gaydar. There are also people who have gay stereotypes who are heterosexual (metrosexual?) and they'll be falsely identified as gay. Once again the idea of a gaydar is flawed. I think gaydars can be a bit of fun when you're out and about and a bit bored, but anybody who actually thinks they seriously has one is a tad deluded, imo. It doesn't take a genius to spot stereotypes in society, and it's hardly enough to call it a "gift". It takes a bit of knowledge on stereotypes and eyesight. Something most people have.

27th Feb 2009, 07:06 AM	#15
Steve EC's Soldier! Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Sargeant sexual Out Status: whoever asks Location: Born in australia, but now living some where else Age: 21 Posts: 2,273 Join Date: May 2008	Re: Gaydar? i disagree i knew martin was gay from the moment i saw his profile pic! __________________ Soldier " there is no room for that in my pocklet" commander " if there is room in your heart then there in your pocket" Soldier " i cant fit my gf in there" -r " have you tried ? until you try you dont know"

27th Feb 2009, 07:20 AM	#16
DexterMorgan The Lonely Stoner Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Santa Monica, CA, USA Age: 18 Posts: 657 Join Date: Feb 2009	Re: Gaydar? Some of my familymembers knew I was gay before I did! __________________ Closets are for clothes; not me.

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27th Feb 2009, 07:41 AM	#17
LyraLissa Member Regular Member Gender: Female Orientation: Flamboyantly Lesbian Out Status: Even the polar bears got the memo. Location: The frozen north Age: 18 Posts: 65 Join Date: Feb 2009	Re: Gaydar? True gaydar's rarely an on-sight thing. But, despite me trying to hide, a friend of mine thought I was gay before I told her. It is possible, but not foolproof. ~Hugs, Lyra __________________ If homosexuality is a disease, let's all call in queer to work. 'Hello, can't work today. Still queer.'

27th Feb 2009, 09:27 AM	#20
riddlerno1 EC Addict Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: All but family Location: London Age: 29 Posts: 712 Join Date: Aug 2008	Re: Gaydar? well i cant personally tell unless someone looks stereotypically gay, and even then do u really know for sure??! Plus i dont think i look stereotypically gay so i wonder if people think im gay by first glance!