For those in same-sex/gender relationships, do you display public affection? And, for those of you who are bi/pan, do you feel as comfortable with PDA with same-sex/gender as with opposite sex/gender? Where do you live? I ask because I've never liked PDAs with the men I've been with (I'm just not a very physically affectionate person in general) but I think I might be with a woman/someone outside the gender binary. I NEVER see that in my neck of the woods and, gosh darnit, I *want* to. I get a childish thrill when I see non-typical couples freely doting on each other. Not just couples of the same gender, but those who break the stereotypes of coupledom (man always older and taller, woman always better looking and thinner, they pretty much look like siblings). I guess I do like so see hetero couples doting on another when it's authentic but that's so commonplace. My world is so homogeneous. I crave variety. Maybe I just wish my world was a little safer/not as judgmental to LGBTQ too. But, wouldn't taking the risk of displaying who you are and who you love be a good way to get the world better used to it? Yeah, I understand how the risk might not be worth it (depending on where you live) and it does suck that anyone should have to take a risk just so that we can move forward in our evolution. Sorry if I'm coming across as crass. I sometimes have a difficult articulating my meaning.
I've never been in a relationship, and not sure I will, but if I ever; 10-20 seconds light kiss on special occasions and hand holding are fine for me. I think; a little scared. But hugging, heavier or longer kisses really scare me. Also it depends who it's in front of and where I am. This goes for any relationship. Although saying this, I kissed someone of the same-sex when I was 9 in front of both our parents and wasn't embarrassed. Probably because I didn't know kissing in front of your parents is something you're probably supposed to be embarrassed about. Also, do straight couples really kiss in supermarkets? I heard it was a big thing when gay couple got asked to stop, but I really wouldn't think straight people would do that either. I guess maybe they do if gay people do. So just wondering. Sorry if that offends anyone, I wouldn't tell anyone to stop for a kiss, but kissing in the first place seems unnecessary in this situation (i.e. location) for me.
I enjoy PDA. I enjoy seeing others who express PDA and I enjoy engaging in it. My partner, however, does not like PDA. He is uncomfortable out of concern for his safety. I believe he is overly conservative as we live in areas that are very LGBT friendly; but he always forwards me articles on instances of crime when they occur. To that, I always argue crimes occur all the time towards straights as well!
I've never been in a relationship. The thought of it crosses my mind every now and then on whether I would even be willing to engage in PDA. The factors for considered this are hard to set since, I've never been in the situation. I usually pin it down to safety of environment. How comfortable do I feel with this person? I'm trying to get used to people staring at me, and being indifferent to their looks. I'd probably get really unnerved. Heck! It wasn't that long ago that I was able to initiate hugs with family members in public!
I'm not sure about supermarkets, but when I was in Sixth Form (basically your last two years in compulsory education, 16-18) I was just sat on a sofa with this straight couple who then started making out, in what is essentially a school. Then they - as well as a lesbian couple - had make out sessions in the school library. It was totally gross. Like, this is a school, learn some self control! Personally, I'm not big on PDA at all, but I'd be alright with hand holding and maybe kisses on the cheek.
As I've gotten older I am more into PDA. Part of me wants to make a point this is normal and the straight people need to get use to it. Now, we are not making out in public because honestly that is something teenagers do but I do as much as I would do if I was with a man and probably even more so. We hold hands, we snuggle at the movie theater, I sit in her personal space when we are at a restaurant, we'll do a light kiss depending upon the situation. Basically anything I want to do. My wife use to have a difficult time with this but over the years she is a lot more comfortable.
For me, it depends on the extent of PDA. I'm ok with holding hands, hugs, and a quick kiss. Sometimes I see people grabbing their partner's butt, making out, etc. That, to me, is something that should be intimate and kept at home. My girlfriend, on the other hand, is pretty much a no go on all PDA. We don't really hold hands or anything when we're in public. I respect that because we do live in small town Alabama where it's not really accepted. We do, however, display PDA when we go out to bars and have had a little bit to drink. It all depends on the place, who we are around, and what's going on. I'm not against it, but I have a line where I think it becomes too much. For me, this applies with all couples.
Off topic: When I read PDA I always think of epidural anaesthesia which is a bit distressing when talking about doing it in public. :lol:
I get that warm and fuzzy feeling when I see couples both hetero and LGBTQ showing how much they are into each other... not exploring your partner's tonsils with your tongue type of affection but holding hands, snuggling and gentle kisses. No, not genital kisses... that comes later in private! I agree that WE should not have to worry about people around us when we want to show affection to our partners.
It did the first day I met my first boyfriend (holding hands at 14yo) then on a first date much more recently (27yo held my hand while walking; I was 34yo). I gotta admit, the first was really cool but, as a 34yo, the second just seemed silly and a little inappropriate.
I'll see where we both are Monday(date night!), and if it happens, then great! If not? We're not there yet, maybe we will be on the second date(assuming there is one). I just wanted to get opinions on first date PDA. I think I'll start a new thread.
I don't tend to like PDA with guys that much. I know it may be silly but I get concerned that since being gay isn't accepted by everyone, it could get me into uncomfortable situations or worse. And, I can always display my affection in private, so I just don't see the real need.
I saw a few gay couples PDA when I was in Vegas in January. It was cute. I've done it with several guys. I enjoy it. If straights can, why can't we?
