So late last year I applied for university, to which I received unconditional offers on all my applications. Needless to say I'm very excited for a variety of reasons and the 3 remaining months simply can't fly by quick enough. Something that's been on my mind is that I'll be studying as a mature student who is also gay and I'm sort of wondering how others may perceive this. I have no intention of revealing my age nor my sexuality to anyone immediately but people will eventually find out one way or another and the chances of my flatmates finding out first is highly likely. Has/is anyone in a similar situation or has/is sharing a flat with a mature gay/bi student? How did it go?
I actually have kind of an experience like this. I rented a room from a lady when I was in high school, living in a town apart from my hometown. Me and my friend were always living in what I can call rooms A and B, but C had many different, interesting residents. One of them was a gay man, and he attended university, so he was maybe four years older than us. It went well - in the sense that his age or sexuality didn't prevent us from being able to chat normally and so on (even though me and my friend weren't out as LGBT yet or anything). This person had some problems, however, and grabbed lots of kitchenware and brought to his room which he didn't return for days or weeks, even things that were mine or my friend's personal belongings rather than part of the common, didn't do the dishes, left old, smelly food in the fridge... etc. But that was just this person in particular having some personal problems with that kind of stuff, apparently. His sexuality or age didn't matter. University environments are typically open and stuff (although sometimes with the exception of programs that attract people with a typically conservative background, like economics and law). So hopefully, your being gay shouldn't be any problem, hopefully. Your being older might make the younger students uncomfortable, realistically speaking, but I think that if you just make the effort to talk to them you'll be able to make plenty of great friends. Good luck with your studies!
Thank you very much for your response! I never really considered the idea that my age could make others uncomfortable. I suppose it's just as well that I have no intention of revealing it too early on. If people ask, I'll just smile and respond with,' Not 18.' and move on.
I am a bisexual masters student. I have a lesbian friend who is in halls. Everything is cool I mean, I've now come out at uni....it was slightly unexpected when it happened but I went with it. It was very freeing. UK students I've found to be very open. For me at least sexuality was a non issue. I knew a lot of mature and gay people in my undergrad too. Whether you come out of not, sexuality isn't a big issue most of the time. Nor is age: we all enjoyed celebrating my friend's 40th in my first year.
I went back to uni as a full time student when I was 32. People perceived me no differently to any other nature student. Happy days
I went to a small (2800 students) liberal arts college as a full-time student when I was 27. Nearly all the students were traditional college age, but in addition to me, there were a few students in their 40s and beyond. Nobody had any objections or problems, I got along fine with the students and made a lot of friends. More recently, I've been taking classes again at a local community college. In some classes, there's quite a mix of ages, from traditional college age to 60s and beyond... one of my professors had a woman in her 80s who had been waiting for her husband to die to go back to school! In one class I was in, I was the oldest student by about 20 years... but nobody ever batted an eyelash. I think it's all about how you approach it. If you treat other students as though they are no different from you, then, for the most part, I think you'll be treated that way in return.
Hi there! As Chip mentioned, it comes down to as to how you approach it, what you make of it. Personally, I wouldn't worry about it. It is quite common to see mature students in college or undergraduate university classes. You might also find that studying as a mature student, could make finding housing/accommodation a bit easier - if you do need to find something.
Thanks very much for the responses! I suppose part of my concern has stemmed from when I returned to college at 21 where almost all of my courses were 16 year olds and was often a topic of gossip and unpleasantness so regretted informing others of my age at the time. It's good to know that my sexuality will likely not be an issue though which gives me a lot of comfort. Although I'm a lot more out than I used to be I'm still somewhat selective about who I tell. I just want my university experience to be at least reasonably as good as I've envisioned, that my sexuality won't make me a target and that those younger than me won't use my age as an excuse for gossip again as although I often ignored it, it was still a little disheartening at times.
To add onto what the others said, from my personal experience as a 24-25 year old grad student taking 6 undergraduate courses, it isn't much of a problem. It seems to be more common nowadays for people to be working on their degrees older in life. It's normal for there to be some 30+ year old students in a college classroom. What was a little weird for me in my particular case was being classmates with TA's. During the first year I was working on my master's, I was required to take remedial computer science courses because I had only taken one relevant course prior to entering the program. One of the TA's leading a lab (that I decided to not sign up for) for an undergraduate logic design course I was taking, was simultaneously one of my classmates in my graduate linear algebra course. I later took a programming class with one my TA's from an undergraduate programming class from the previous year. And on another occasion, I was assigned to work on a team project with a classmate who already earned her PhD in particle physics.
I can relate to your situation because all the students in my class when I decided to go back to school were in their early 20's and some even 19. Although, I never revealed my age, it was apparent that I was older due to the fact that a lot of topics that were brought up in class, I had the most appropriate responses which resulted in some students assuming that I was older than them and had experience to live by. However, I did not let them stop my progression and I graduated top of my class. Therefore, you keep moving forward and keep your focus on obtaining your degree.
