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Old 6th Mar 2009, 10:28 PM   #1
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Default "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

While my sister was taking me to school this morning, she started talking about what her co-worker asked her. She asked her: "Could you ever really be friends with lesbians?" My sister said yes and said she even invited two lesbian friends and two straight friends to our house a few years back. Then, for some reason, they came up with this conclusion:

"Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

I told her that's not true because there're several straight guys with gay best friends, but then she said: "How do you know if they're truly straight?" She did have a point, even if she did generalize a ton, but it made me stop and think: Can gay and straight guys really be close friends? Can they talk about sex, relationships, private and non-romantic intimate things straight buddies share with each other?

I think so. I believe both guys can be confident in their sexuality and have a strong, lasting friendship and discuss gay relationships and sex. My good friend is straight and while we don't talk about our love life much, we still can get along and have a good chat. What do you guys think?

EDIT: The explaination behind the opinion is she thinks straight men would be too insecure to have a gay close friend, which is another generalization.
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Last edited by Étoile; 6th Mar 2009 at 10:42 PM..
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Old 6th Mar 2009, 10:31 PM   #2
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

Well... can a guy and a gal be best friends=P
Yesss, so why can't a gay and straight guy?

Friendship doesn't have anything to do with sexuality...
It's about who you feel comfortable with=]

So, yes, I believe straight guys and gay guys can be best friends, and have D&Ms just like anyone else.
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Old 6th Mar 2009, 10:35 PM   #3
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

Most of my friends are straight men. We talk about the same stuff as everyone else. I find that the ones that are comfortable talking about straight sex and relationships are comfortable talking about gay sex and relationships.
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Old 6th Mar 2009, 10:41 PM   #4
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

My best friend is a straight man.
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Old 6th Mar 2009, 10:58 PM   #5
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

My best friend is straight and married. I say look at your poll, The girls said no but us guys seem to say yes and gave examples.
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Old 6th Mar 2009, 11:38 PM   #6
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

I'm sure they can, but there aren't may examples of it.
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Old 7th Mar 2009, 12:18 AM   #7
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

I have lots of straight guy friends.

I can still talk to them about girls, but they can't really do the same for me.

Then again I keep my orientation on the downlow. :/
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Old 7th Mar 2009, 01:17 AM   #8
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

I have a friend who is deadly straight and while we're not best friends I can talk a whole lot about gay related things and he wouldn't be freaked out.

I think it depends more on how people deal with sexuality as an issue. Where I go to college nobody really cares if you're gay or not, and so generally you can talk about gay relationships and they wouldn't bat an eye.

That's not to say they're completely fine with gay related discussions, it's just they don't really care, in the same way if people started describing straight sex to me I'd be a bit weirded out.
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Old 7th Mar 2009, 01:20 AM   #9
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

I would say 3 of my closest 5 friends are straight males!
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Old 7th Mar 2009, 01:21 AM   #10
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

I have a very very very straight friend.
He's been my best bud since we were kids.

I LOOOOOOOVE him!

He is totally fine with me being gay (And I accept his straightness too)
we talk about sex and we're totally comfortable with it. We hug each other.
We are totally fine with each other.

Yes. There can be friendship.
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Old 7th Mar 2009, 01:24 AM   #11
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

Definately. One of my two best friends is a straight man and there's also a big group of straight guys that I go out with.
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Old 7th Mar 2009, 01:34 AM   #12
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

Quote:
Originally Posted by Étoile View Post

"Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."
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Old 7th Mar 2009, 01:44 AM   #13
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

All my best friends are either straight guys or girls. So yes, gays and straights can be best friends. It also kind of depends what your group talks about. My group mainly talks about music. In fact almost every conversation we have revolves around music. :P
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Old 7th Mar 2009, 02:22 AM   #14
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

This is one of the reasons that I have so few friends (or possibly none) - apart from my having moved too often from country to country. I believe it is truly difficult to be a friend with someone from the "opposite sex" and, as long as I was closeted, I considered everyone to be of the opposite sex!
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Old 7th Mar 2009, 02:27 AM   #15
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

Yes. About 60% of my friends are Straight, and we all talk about sex and stuff, they don't give a hoot. It's great
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Old 7th Mar 2009, 04:24 AM   #16
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

So you're saying that all my friends aren't really my friends?
All my male friends are straight, or so they tell me.
I was the one who was uncomfortable talking about my sex life with them.
Just last night one of my friends asked me about a guy I was interested in.
I've talked about sex with them and they've talked about sex with me.....hahaha that last part of the sentence could be misinterpreted badly.

Actually one of my friends who is one of those crazy hard core christians sad down and watched Queer As Folk a while back.
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Old 7th Mar 2009, 04:32 AM   #17
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

A best friend of mine is straight, i know this because his girlfriend is also my best friend.

We can talk about ANYTHING.
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Old 7th Mar 2009, 05:06 AM   #18
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

My best friend/non related brother is straight
And we seriously talk about everything.

EVERYTHING
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Old 7th Mar 2009, 05:14 AM   #19
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

All of my best friends are straight guys and gals
We don't talk much about sex though. But I am fine with it. They are the best friends I have ever had
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Old 7th Mar 2009, 05:27 AM   #20
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Default Re: "Straight guys can never truly be friends with gay guys."

Quote:
Originally Posted by Étoile View Post
I told her that's not true because there're several straight guys with gay best friends, but then she said: "How do you know if they're truly straight?"
That's a bit of a lame answer, though. The prime example of a "no true scotsman"-fallacy.
There's literally no way in which she couldn't caounter any example you give with: "that just proves the supposed straight guy isn't really straight".

I do think it's possible. There are also a lot more things you can do with straightr friends than to talk about relationships and sex. In fact, none of my straight friends ever shared all this intimate stuff even when they thought I was straight.
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