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A question for biological women who are lesbians

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by SkyWinter, Jul 29, 2016.

  1. SkyWinter

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    Do you ever look at a woman and think "I'm attracted to her/desire her" and at the same time think "That dress would probably look great on me"?

    I ask because as a bio male, but someone trying to figure out my gender-ness I often have this type of thought, but it's weird because I can have such similar thoughts about the same person.
     
  2. Nightdream

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    I'm not lesbian, but yes. It happens a lot to me though both thoughts usually come about the masculine looking people(including women and other non-men).
     
  3. SHACH

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    Not usually. I might think her clothes look great on her, but unless she's rocking some sort of of tomboyish rocker style I won't be wearing it. But thats more to do with my preference in clothing. I like men's clothes and boots and leather jackets and denim and shirts. Actually there was one girl I crushed on who has the most amazing collection of button up shirts - then I definitely felt like I'd like her clothes. I've started my own collection since.
     
  4. Creativemind

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    Not really. I usually prefer my own style. Also I am not feminine and dislike feminine taste (I don't even like feminine women that much). I hate dresses/skirts, especially on myself, though some women can look good in a dress. In that case I'd only admire her attractiveness.

    Even if I would wear the clothes, I usually just think "she has good taste". I don't imagine myself in her position as all, other than "Omg, cool shirt!".
     
  5. RGEm

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    Yeah, I have them frequently. I have a friend who has amazing fashion sense, so I always want to wear what she's wearing, but at the same time I'm also attracted to her.
     
  6. scarlettreid95

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    Sometimes. The main problem is o try and be exactly like my crush, which is really bad for my self confidence. I'm new here, cab anyone tell me how to make a post and how to put up the little sign in my profile which says stuff like depressed or whatever
     
  7. SkyWinter

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    So it seems like those of you who aren't attracted to a more feminine looking woman also don't like the feminine clothes, but those of you who are attracted to a less feminine woman will like the less feminine clothes? So there is an overlap of attraction/style, it just depends on what you are attracted to/like?
     
  8. Nightdream

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    I don't think attraction is related to the style. I can find feminine looking people attractive, but I just don't feel like wearing the same clothes as they do. With masculine looking people, I can feel both attraction and wish I looked more like them.
     
  9. HappyGirlLucky

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    This is exactly how it is for me, I dress tomboyishly but I am attracted to pretty much all types of women. Although I have found that I do tend to favor tomboys a bit and I really like it when my otherwise very feminine best friend borrows my hoodies, because she looks just amazing in them.
     
  10. logansarah

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    When I see a woman I'm attracted to usually what they're wearing wouldn't look good on me, but I wish it would look on me.
     
  11. ghostly

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    yes! all the time.
     
  12. EleanorHunter

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    Pretty similar things, yes.

    The biggest problem with being a lesbian is the constant argument in your head of "Do I want to be with her, or be her?"
     
  13. thrashgal

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    neh, i dont like girly clothes but i will notice it on a pretty lady and think "damn shes beautiful" ...if she wears anything similar to what i would wear (casual jeans/ts) then i think "damn shes fukin sexy, i bet shed look hott as hell in my shirt" im not into the "done up" kinda girl, heels, dresses, even the professional work attire, thats just too flashy for me...a chick whos down to play in the dirt with me (so to say) is the sexiest thing ever in my opinion..more so if she carries herself in a feminine way all the while (biting lip) mmmm....
     
  14. midwestgirl89

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    My answer is: sometimes. I tend to be attracted to feminine women. Feminine women can wear dresses or tomboyish clothes. Fashion doesn't have anything to do with their feminine qualities as far as I'm concerned. I have been attracted to a woman and at the same time I've been like "Dang I really like that jacket and hat. I wish I was that cool." Case in point: Brandi Carlile. She's famous but I always have thought she's pretty however I also like her style and got some style inspiration from her. I don't like dresses much but androgynous clothing I'm all up for.
     
  15. SkyWinter

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    It's interesting to hear you say this, because this is how I feel, but as a bio guy with gender fluctuations I also think "Well, I can't "be" her". But you can. (easier than me I guess :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: ) So why is there that type of simultaneous thought/confusion about attraction/envy for someone who is a biological female? Is it because you are a lesbian? Do straight women ever feel this way?
     
    #15 SkyWinter, Aug 2, 2016
    Last edited: Aug 2, 2016
  16. rudysteiner

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    I'm not a lesbian female, but I feel like this is kind of similar to looking at a guy and not being able to decide whether I want to be him or I want to have sex with him, haha.
     
  17. SkyWinter

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    How often does that happen? With every guy? Only some? Is it generally more masculine men? Feminine?
     
  18. EleanorHunter

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    I'll be honest, I don't even think gender has all that much to do with it. There are a lot of things involved when I say "I want to be her" after meeting someone that may not be the same for each person. For instance, did I like her style and want to dress like her? Did I like her personality and wished I carried myself the same way? But I seem to do that for guys as well, I just know that I don't want to date them.

    I guess the only reason this happens is that attraction and appreciation are two feelings that kind of get mixed up. You can appreciate how someone looks without being attracted to them. LGBT ladies may have this problem more often since they know the potential for them to be attracted, whereas straight women wouldn't consider it as much (at least in my experience).

    ... Does that make any sense? I feel like I'm rambling, but it's hard to discuss emotions like this. Guess the easiest way to answer is that no emotions are in black in white, and we work to try and figure out the grey feelings we have. :lol:
     
  19. Synesthesia

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    I'm bio female and bi-gender and I get this a lot with guys I'm attracted to. Not with women though. They tend to be fairly feminine guys physically speaking. The degree of attraction/wanting to look like can vary too.
     
  20. DragonOfNarnia

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    Yes, I sometimes have both train of thoughts about girls, but not for all girls, and not 100% of the time for any one girl. Just replace the word "dress" with "ripped jeans/ skinny jeans/ shoes/ shirt" :slight_smile:

    ---------- Post added 5th Aug 2016 at 01:25 AM ----------

    Yes, I get both trains of thoughts for girls, but not all girls, and not 100% of the time for any one girl. Just replace the word "dress" with "ripped jeans / skinny jeans/ shoes/ shirt" because my clothing style is not ultra-feminine. :slight_smile:

    ---------- Post added 5th Aug 2016 at 01:29 AM ----------

    I have both trains of thoughts for girls, but not for all girls, and not 100% of the time for any one girl. In my case, I replace the word "dress" with "skinny/ripped jeans", "shoes", or "shirt" :lol: