Appearance vs. Character

Not whether or not they're a good person but if someone dresses punk, I tend to expect they're into punk. Just things like that.

 

Pretty much this. If I see someone wearing camo, work boots, and a mesh hat, I tend to think they're a redneck. That kinda thing. I don't base that on whether or not they're a good person though.

 

I don't really judge people on their fashion sense, especially to the point of making a judgement of their person. That being said I admire stylishly dressed people. Also if their style is like mine I'll likely make a point to tell them how cool they look.

If your clean and confident in what your wearing that'll shine through over the fashion anyway.

 

Yes. It's a human impulse and one that from time to time ought to be resisted. When I first meet someone, that human need for order calls for me to categorize the person. If you want a politically correct reason, it can be to better communicate with them. The less politically correct reason can be to play to stereotypes--which can have some truth to them but only to a point.

When I was a young student in school, I found myself judged for my appearance, and it made an impression on me. I try to be on the alert to change any assumption that is incorrect, when I have made a judgment like that.

Let's suppose for example that you meet someone who has all the unkempt appearance of someone who is dependent on drugs. Everything, that you notice initially, fits this assumption. In the back of your mind, you should be thinking there may be an alternative explanation.

So that's the honest answer. I do it, and quite often I catch myself being unreasonable about it.

As for the adage that "it's what's inside that counts," it probably counts for something, but you can't get no respect if you look like Stephen Hawking, unless there is something pretty exceptional in there. Bottom line: People who look different (not to mention those who have ALS) end up having to try harder.

Ever have a conversation with someone afflicted by cerebral palsy? Most people misunderstand the disease, and assume that the CP person is mentally challenged. This is a mistake. Imagine how hard it is to talk to someone, when they think your IQ is nonexistent.

For every Wozniak, it appears there must also be a Jobs. There are a lot of Wozniaks in the world, who don't live up to their potential, because prejudice holds them back. So how do we simplify our interactions and reduce the noise by using assumptions, and not disrespect others?

Good question.

 

I do often jump to conclusions but also try to pull myself back from those sort of thoughts. However dressing certain ways doesn't only lead to bad stereotypes. If someone dresses poorly you might think that person is very relaxed and easy-going and would like to be around them but dressing sharp might make a person also seem very reliable and make you want to be around them as well. Stereotyping doesn't last long of course and once you get to know a person from talking to them you might forget about past impressions.

 

If a person is slovenly and unkempt no matter their style I don't think it speaks highly to their character if they don't take care of their self.

 

Sometimes but only if I think that someone may look dangerous. Like if I'm walking on my own in the middle of the night and there's a dodgy guy in a trench coat walking up to me. That sort of thing. I don't usually judge personality on appearance I think, although I used to more. I've just found that it's not very accurate sometime so best not to assume

 

Typically, there are only a few select cases where I'll judge somebody based on their clothing or the like:

1: Blatant offense/ Troll bait: Think of Westboro Baptist, but shirts. I've seen it.

2: Their pants are on their knees or heels, and I'm questioning the efficiency of their locomotion.

3: They wear this abomination:

Spoiler

Otherwise, I let their words and actions do all the talking.

 

Yeah, I don't judge the content of someone's character based on what they wear, but I can kind of guess the content of their playlist.

I will say I have some friends who pride themselves on dressing as blandly as possible to show they're not as shallow as fashionistas. I don't really get that. A blandly dressed person can be just as shallow as a person who cares too much about style. But whatever.

 

Unfortunately first impressions last, so with that said, I judge someone based on their appearance. If they're well groomed, dresses well and have this air of confidence about them, that's how I sum them up.

 

For a first impression, I do make assumptions based on appearance. I think that appearance and character can often be linked: people often dress to reflect their personality and how they want the world to see them. However, once I get to know people, their character takes over and I don't think so much about their appearance.

 

Normally character. I feel like I judge men for their looks more since I see so many more of them look like fucking slobs and then expect their potential girlfriend to be a perfect model. Most women I know look like they take care of themselves, but even when they don't they don't expect a model guy. So in a way judging for looks also has to do with character.

 

I have my first impressions of people, but I don't judge them based on that, especially once I get to know them (character). I've been called "goth" countless times, but once you get to know me, you'll see I'm quite friendly/very humorous/kind/etc. That's how I look at it when viewing others.

 

Thank you. I do think your old friend is right, but unfortunately it doesn't offer a solution to the human need to simplify and reduce "noise" in facilitating communication.

But here's another example from my own life. I'm getting to the point where people could call me a geezer. I frequently read how younger people today are lazy, self-centered, and narcissistic. And then, you add to it that fashion changes, and some of the fashions seem foreign to people my age (although you'd be surprised at my taste in certain things).

Anyway, more often than not, when I actually take time to interact with younger people today, I find considerate, thoughtful people. Sure there are the troubled exceptions, as there always are. But still, I would put many, many people from these later generations up against my own any day of the week. I think the bashing of millennials and the other post-baby-boomer generations in the media is cheap click-baiting and not accurate.

I've lost count of the number of times I've looked at someone I'm about to talk to and thought, "gee, this person must be a.....(fill in the blank)," but then quickly discovered that they are much better than that impression and defy those expectations. The trick is not to write them off on first sight, and be willing to correct those assumptions.

 

I hope you don't find my answer all too neutral but I'd say I base on both character and appearance It's the appearance that catches my first attention and makes me curious Then it's more about character once I got to known that person They both play their important roles so a nice balance of personal preferences is what I believe that makes everythin' perfect in the end^^

 

its not necessarily the way they dress and looks like its just that people will find you easy to talk to or someone to talk to if they think you look just fine for them. appearance may help you to gain respect but it can't assure anything about your personality. and besides if you or other people feel comfortable the way they dress d'hell they care just do your thing people will judge you anyways. its the personality and humor that drives people crazy not the looks, or if it is, that feeling was just temporary. beauty will fade, personality and humor prolongs.