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Too big of an age differance?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Lacri, Mar 17, 2009.

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  1. Lacri

    Lacri Guest

    My boyfriend and I have been together for the last 4 and a half months, and we have been so happy. He is such a sweetheart. Though most of my friends find us "cute" or sweet, some think that the age differance between us is a little to wide. So I decided to ask everyone here, where people will be able to answer me honestly without lying because they are my friends. I'm 17 and he is 14. He is really mature for his age, but I'm sure that someone could look at my saying that as a justification for something wierd. We are both each other's first boyfriend by the way. His uncle (who is also gay) thinks that I am only with him for the sex because of my age, even though I have never met his Uncle. So I don't know..... I guess will everyone just honestly tell me if they think that the age differance is wierd?
     
    #1 Lacri, Mar 17, 2009
  2. Gerry

    Gerry
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    It's only a 3 year age difference. I don't think that's weird. Late on in life when you end up with your life long partner, 3 years is going to seem very close in age. It's just at the ages you guys are at I guess. But like I said, I don't think it's weird. You're both still underage so it shouldn't be a problem.
     
    #2 Gerry, Mar 17, 2009
  3. jotheoneandonly

    jotheoneandonly Guest

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    love hasd no age limit, unlike driving a car.. *gasp* the dreaded saftey laws.

    as long as your happy together.(*hug*)
     
    #3 jotheoneandonly, Mar 17, 2009
  4. Greggers

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    That does not seem so weird to me. As you both get older it wont be so weird to other people. Three years is honestly not alot. Ive met people on this site who are 15 who are more mature and together than 25 year olds so yea :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
    #4 Greggers, Mar 17, 2009
  5. Melissa

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    3 years is NOT a huge age gap. Just ignore them, and be happy together. : )
     
    #5 Melissa, Mar 17, 2009
  6. Alex19

    Alex19
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    it only seems like alot to them b/c your both young. if u were 30 and he were 27, it wouldnt matter to anyone. keep on with the relationship- who cares what ppl say?
     
    #6 Alex19, Mar 17, 2009
  7. kettleoffish

    kettleoffish
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    well I have a friend who's 15, who is currently with a 21 year old, and they seem pretty happy together, it depends on the people. She is very mature for her age too. It really depends on you and him.
     
    #7 kettleoffish, Mar 17, 2009
  8. LornTehViking

    LornTehViking Guest

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    It just depends on maturity. That's about it :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
    If you guys are happy, be happy.
     
    #8 LornTehViking, Mar 17, 2009
  9. Filip

    Filip
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    When you'll be 100, he'll be 97 and the difference will be purely academic :wink:

    It shouldn't be a problem. Though I've seen an age difference become the cause of some splits, for example when one moves to college and the other is still in highschool. That's not really the age though, just changes in environment.
    But don't let that deter you!
     
    #9 Filip, Mar 17, 2009
  10. Alannah26

    Alannah26
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    3 years a nothing...I know people who have like 30 years difference and I know a woman who is older than the husband by 10 years and they're happily married. Yeah, some close minded people think its weird, but they're happy and thats all that matters.
     
    #10 Alannah26, Mar 17, 2009
  11. The Enigma

    The Enigma Guest

    I think a lot of the stigma involved with underage relationships stems from sexual practices. I still think he should have time to mature...16 is the cut off age for me back then, and still is. Really, because I think 14...he's just entering puberty, probably can't climax, is curious, and will want to explore others which can lead to cheating and make the relationship unstable.

    However, the 3 years between you isn't normally much of a problem but at those young years...its seen differently. Once you hit 18, you need to be prepared for more dire consequences if you're ever found out. :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: It's a shame I'm not him. I like older guys.
     
    #11 The Enigma, Mar 17, 2009
  12. Zach

    Zach
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    :roflmao: I won't even go there .... just yet :badgrin: :lol:
     
    #12 Zach, Mar 17, 2009
  13. BitterEdge

    BitterEdge Guest

    Yes, not cause its 3 years difference though. I know many men who married way older including my best friend who is 23 married a 42 year old. It's that he is underage and that he hasn't yet had many life experiences, where you really start them in hs.
     
    #13 BitterEdge, Mar 17, 2009
  14. -Michael-

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    It only seems wrong as he is 14 (classed as a child) and you're 17 (an adult...sort of)

    But it's only 3 years.
    When he's 16 you're 19...

    it's not that big of a deal.

    But i do hope you're not having sex with him
    ...that is a no no
     
    #14 -Michael-, Mar 17, 2009
  15. silas99

    silas99
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    I think I would be able to give better advise if I knew both of you. Because I think that it is difficult to make sweeping generalisations about people....and each circumstance should be looked at on an individual basis.

    I would tread very carefully with this Lacri because your boyfriend is underage. (although I'm not sure if the sex laws in the US are the same as in the UK....here you're only legal at 16). From what you have said your boyfriend is quite mature, but that does not necessarily correlate to sexual maturity. Boys develop immensely between the ages of 14 and 17, and you dont want to push him towards something he may not be ready for. Although I am certain you wouldnt do that.

    All I can say is be careful, because you might find yourself in a position where you are being charged for underage sex. (especially if his uncle is clued up on the situation). Take care Lacrixxx
     
    #15 silas99, Mar 17, 2009
  16. Zach

    Zach
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    Seriously, 3 years seems to be a big difference at your present age. But don't worry about it, it's not that big of a deal. :thumbsup: I'm older than you are, and my boyfriend is 8 years younger than I am. We have a lot of things in common, despite the age difference. :slight_smile:
     
    #16 Zach, Mar 17, 2009
  17. Remington

    Remington
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    It's the maturity difference. He might seem like he's mature for his age, but he's still fourteen. And my experience with younger people is that they just get really irritating. Good luck.
     
    #17 Remington, Mar 17, 2009
  18. Just Adam

    Just Adam
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    i think this is actually a good relationship you both love each other theat is the most important thing first of all but also beeing 14 hes at the age where life does get a bit tricky you do start thinkign more about yourself as a person and a sexual beeing it can be a mind bending scary time and to have you who have the experience there to comfort him and help him can be really benaficial for him. as for the sex thats left to the two of you but be carefull depending where you are you can get in trouble dont want that but love doesent need sex thats just the ice cream on the jelly

    just enjoy yourselves and have a happy life living it as you two want not how others want you two
     
    #18 Just Adam, Mar 17, 2009
  19. sdc91

    sdc91
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    After high school (and to some degree, even in uni), age is just a number. I think a 3 year gap is perfectly fine in the 20s and 30s+. Right now it may seem big, but if you stick together there's no problem. Just pay attention to the laws of consent, or else you might find yourself in jail.
     
    #19 sdc91, Mar 17, 2009
  20. littledinosaurs

    littledinosaurs
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    Thats not that big.
     
    #20 littledinosaurs, Mar 17, 2009
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