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FTM vs. MTF: Which is easier?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Ozma, Feb 15, 2017.

  1. Ozma

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    There really isn't a good way to word this, but which do you think is "easier". For example, which is an "easier" transition to make, and be accepted by people as that?
     
  2. kibou97

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    When it comes to being accepted by society, I think it's easier for FTM to be accepted than MTF but a lot of it depends on where you live. There's the whole "Men need to be super masculine" debacle and while people who are FTM are in fact women, they were born male so they automatically get that sort of stigma attached to them. At the same time though, people will give a lot of crap to women and those who were born female simply for being more masculine than the average woman. It'd really depend on where the person is at though. I'm not super familiar with specific laws anywhere but I remember reading about how a youtuber (gigi gorgeous) got stuck in Dubai for a while being accused of being a man dressing like a woman because her passport still had her gender listed as male which is illegal in Dubai but I have no idea if it's also the same way only reversed there too.
     
  3. BrookeVL

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    I don't think either side truly has it any easier. Each side has different challenges. Maybe a slight nod to FTM's because testosterone is magic. So is estrogen, but not as powerful a magic. Other than that, it's pretty even I think.
     
  4. PrinceVegeta

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    I agree with brooke. I don't think either side has it any easier. Maybe ftm a little since we could transition a bit more subtly, but neither of us have it any easier in my opinion.
     
    #4 PrinceVegeta, Feb 15, 2017
    Last edited: Feb 15, 2017
  5. gravechild

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    Yes, but at the cost of visibility. I used to think of it as an advantage, but because society is more accepting of women dressing, acting masculine, trans men get more "questioned" than trans women.
     
  6. PrinceVegeta

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    Oh, so that's why when some people do find out i'm biologically a girl I am viewed as a butch dyke? Even masculine girls get questioned :/
     
    #6 PrinceVegeta, Feb 15, 2017
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  7. gravechild

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    Exactly! Because it's seen as "non-threatening". Want to emulate men? That's cute. Want to emulate women? Pervert!

    I'll say, that for all that trans women have been pathologized, most people are at least aware of their existence. There are many popular women in the media, going back decades, so even if there's more disapproval and risk, society accepts that they are here to stay. When someone says "trans", someone like Gigi Gorgeous probably comes to mind.

    It's strikingly similar to how gay men vs lesbians are viewed. I have too many trans male friends who say they're the first trans man many have met. A bigger surprise when they're not straight, ie attracted only to women.
     
  8. Miaplacidus

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    Well, from my cisgendered point of view, which might not be the most PC ever, and mostly regarding physical changes:

    MTFs, if they choose to do so (most I knew wouldn't take the risk) can have surgery resulting in pretty much anatomically correct female genitalia. However, in many (most?) cases, no matter how many surgeries they get done, it's still obvious that they're trans; say, very tall, square-jawed, wide-shouldered women are very rare, and even those (at least here) are "suspected" to be trans even if they aren't. This implies that they're fully exposed all the time with all the discrimination that implies.

    On the other side FTMs, once they have their breasts removed and go on full T treatment (and hopefully some exercise) usually become indistinguishable from cis men, which can act as a "protection" from discrimination in public, as they won't be recognized as trans unless they explicitly say so in most cases. However, genital reassignment is much less, uh, "perfected" than the MTF version. This can be a problem for both straight- and gay-identified transguys as most women would expect to be penetrated and many, if not most, gay men are famously and loudly repulsed by vaginas.

    Having said that, I find genital reassignment risky and gruesome. I have zero sexual experience with trans people, either MTF or FTM. I'm not really attracted (uh, most of the time) to MTFs; FTMs are so few and far between down here that I've never actually met one that I knew of (as I'm more attracted to men, I find FTMs much more arousing than MTFs, though) but I think that in either case, I'd prefer the "original" genitalia and wouldn't think of a FTM as less male for having a vagina, or a FTM as less female for having a penis. (That would probably be different if I was 100% gay and strongly disliked vaginas, which isn't the case)

    So, I guess, that FTMs have it easier in society, while MTFs have it easier in bed.

    ---------- Post added 16th Feb 2017 at 02:55 AM ----------

    As I said above I have never met a trans guy in real life, but I'm surprised of all the cases I've seen on the Internet of trans guys being gay or bi (as in, trans guys being into guys.) The trans women I know are almost universally straight (they like men)
     
  9. anthracite

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    Depends. For early transition FTM is easier because we can look like boys, a lot younger than we are, but boys. Later on I think the MTF side has it better because they have the better results downstairs.
     
  10. AlamoCity

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    Cis gay guy here, but...

    For visibility the power of testosterone (whether natural or artificial) produces better changes and would help FTMs "look" the part and pass. That's why males tend to gain muscle mass much quicker than females. But, as can be said regarding genitalia, it seems trans women have the upper hand.

    I would say in some aspects FTMs face certain issues that might not be as "public" but would cause issues of self-esteem and an affront to their masculinity. Whether gay or straight, the penis seems to be an issue at the heart of sexual intercourse. An FTM might feel inadequate to satisfy a female partner and feel unable to "perform" as told by society; in a gay relationship, one issue that might come about is how the cis man would pleasure his partner given that anatomical issues might prevent knowing off the cuff how and what to do. Of course, every sexual relationship should be based on open communication. That said, there would also be the issue of climaxing. While women can "fake it" it's pretty darn hard for males to fake it. Plus, there would be the whole issue of "dominance;" while rules and mores are changing, it seems that the dominant partner in any relationship with at least one man in it (gay/straight) by societal standards has a penis. While FTMs might pass an awful lot more than MTFs, I'm not sure if they're as immune to mental issues that may accompany masculinity and an inherent inability to fulfill every checkbox society (unfairly) hands to men.
     
  11. Spot

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    I agree, that's basically what I came to say :slight_smile:
     
  12. HojaVioleta

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    I'm intersex, and in a rare position of having kind of done both. Though I strongly disapprove of the language used (mtf/ftm is generally considered inaccurate and offensive in my experience). It's hard for anyone transition, and many of the struggles are too different to compare. I will, however, highlight a couple of things. Anyone who experiences transmisogyny is at a far greater risk of violence, and also a kind of general, systematic discrimination that, from what I've seen leads to less employment, more homelessness etc . One of my partners pointed out recently that almost everyone they know who is or has been homeless recently (including the two of us) is transfeminine.

    That isn't to say there aren't certain parts of being transmasculine that are harder. Binding, for example, is something that can be pretty diffficult.