So, I was looking at dating websites, specifically the basic "top rated" ones... only to find they only allow for the most basic selection of things to start with. Namely the whole "i am a M/F into M/F" Now, it's fine for the LG part of LGBT... but what about the rest of us. Apparently ***** doesn't have a effecient solution to this as they have you set up 2 profiles "M/F into M" and "M/F into F" rather than just having one that is "M/F into Both" To me this seems counter-intuitive as it basically means having 2 of the exact same profile on file with only one difference between them. I also worry about if the people on those kinds of sites would say that I'm "lying" about being female when they see in the first sentence of the profile that I'm Trans. I also found out about one "Transsexual" dating site that was only for Trans Women, and "Nice Guys" which I effectively read as them meaning Cis Guys, which just raised the question for me of... What if I want to date a girl instead of a guy? I guess part of this is just anxiety of this past Valentines day being my first without a Boyfriend/Girlfriend and so soon after the breakup... but still, why are dating website options so limited everywhere except OK Cupid(still haven't received many messages there)?
Strange. I've had this irrational fear for a long time (still do kind of) that openly showing that I'm bisexual might turn off the straight girls who might otherwise show interest in me. So maybe that's part of the reasoning behind why some dating sites have you split up your profile where you want men vs your profile where you want women. They may think that Bisexuality is a turn off. That's at least the initial vibe that I get. Because I thought there were at least a few notable dating apps or sites that cover a wider spectrum of genders and orientations.
Personally, if someone thought being Bi, or in my case Demi-pan, was a turn off. It probably wouldn't work anyway just on the level that they would probably find out at some point anyway. No reason to be ashamed of it.
Dating sites for trans people are just god awful. The gender options are usually geared towards cis people and sexuality is a ridged choice to make selections easier. The ones supposedly for us seem to be specifically geared towards some cis guys fetishize of us. Seeing the amount of dating sites with "ladyboy" in the name or as a description was enough to put me off on even trying. As for why they're so limited in options and scope, I think it comes from society being so clueless still. A lot of people confuse porn and the medias interpretation of us with reality because we're not common place in most peoples lives. Between the two I honestly think people just assume trans women are just into cis men.
I kinda just wish we had more 'real' options than just [removed]. That's the only site I've seen that lets you fully set what it is you're looking for.
While it fine to discuss the topic, please make sure not to mention any 18+ dating sites. Please keep in mind that Empty Closets is a PG13 site. Thank you.
As a cis gay guy it's pretty easy finding dates on dating apps (legitimate ones that have a heterosexual counterpart or the ability to service both gay/bi and straight people). I've been on several since I started more seriously looking. They key is finding quality dates. PS I don't use "hookup" apps.
Why don't you just say that you are female, and then mention in your bio that you are a trans female?
Because a lot of people see photos they like and typically gloss over what's written, then report you for "tricking" them when you tell them in a message. Or they just report you if you do mention it out of spite.
