Emotional cutting? - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered people coming out

BeautifulStranger · 20th Apr 2009, 04:47 AM

Not physical harm... but...

Does anyone else have a habit of looking at pictures/reading letters/listening to music/whatever that'll hurt them emotionally and make them cry?

I've recently developed a horrible addiction of stalking Mike and Terry's facebook pages and it's absolutely killing me... but I can't stop.

The two are back together and are so blissful and gah... I hate them.

**Maddy** · 20th Apr 2009, 04:59 AM

I don't do it so much anymore, but yeah, I used to do that all the time. I still have a song that Kathryn wrote me when I was 16, and for easily a year I carried it around with me and read it all the time, despite the fact that it made me cry. (She told me afterwards that she'd written it while stoned and couldn't remember a thing about it. Nice to know that's what I'm worth.)

Just Adam · 20th Apr 2009, 05:01 AM

when i lost my mum i would listen to a song that upset me dont know why think i just wanted to try and feel

KaydeeJayde · 20th Apr 2009, 06:45 AM

I'm the same. I always listen to songs that make me cry, because it makes me deal with what I'm feeling. I know that if I don't do that, I'll find ways to avoid dealing with it.

I also listen to songs that remind me of my ex also because it makes me remember all the good times, as well as singing the songs I wrote about her when we were together. And yeah, it hurts.

aerwolfen · 20th Apr 2009, 06:53 AM

i think we all at some point in time just need to cry and get those depressed feelings out of our system,anxiety will cause us to be overwhelmed with feelings that sometimes is really hard to handle and the best release our body and mind provide is a good cry, i do many times even when i'm feeling happy,holding back feelings can really build up in the mind and its completely normal for those feelings to come out when you don't expect them too,.

Jonah 4 · 20th Apr 2009, 07:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BeautifulStranger

Not physical harm... but...

Does anyone else have a habit of looking at pictures/reading letters/listening to music/whatever that'll hurt them emotionally and make them cry?

I've recently developed a horrible addiction of stalking Mike and Terry's facebook pages and it's absolutely killing me... but I can't stop.

The two are back together and are so blissful and gah... I hate them.

mmm...I think it is a human thing to find a way to vent out emotions. It's just not always done in the healthiest of ways.

My biggest one deals with anger. I'm not really an angry apart from issues that matter to me. So I have this horrible(nerdy I know) habbit of looking up topics on google news that matter to me then reading the comment section so I can get an anger fix.

On a more emotional level when I get lonely I tend to watch gay-themed love stories, Christian and Oliver for example, but I don't think that is quite as unhealthy. The only way I know to get past these feelings is to go and doing something about it...but when thats not possible I'm either angry, depressed or angry and depressed.

Anyway, sorry for the wordiness...I guess I'm just saying I think I get where your coming from.

Courtneyyy · 20th Apr 2009, 08:47 AM

Sometimes I do things like that to make myself cry.
I don't cry that much, but I get stressed out and upset easily.
Once I cry it all out, I feel much better, so I'll do things that I know will get me to cry, even tho they aren't what's currently bothering me.

GhostDog · 20th Apr 2009, 09:24 AM

I watch a movie called "The Sky Is Falling" (with Dedee Pfeiffer), especially whenever I'm feeling really shitty about myself. It makes me cry even more, but the ending is so happy, I end up feeling a lot better at the end!

**Eleanor Rigby** · 20th Apr 2009, 09:26 AM

Anything that makes me think about my best friend makes me cry. It could be songs, films, letters, drawings, books, anything related to him one way or another. In a way these things hurt me, and in a way they make me feel better by remembering all we used to be for each other.
I keep the things that make me think about him in a box and from time to time, I open the box. And every time I know I will feel the pain again, and I will cry, but I carry this pain with me anyway and I think it is ealthier to express these feelings than keep it them inside all the time.
I am also a very emotional girl. I can cry very easily watching a film or reading a book, but I think it is good to vent emotions out. I think that being able to let it go when that doesn't matter makes me able to cope with things and prevents me from falling appart when it is important that I behave myself.

Mirko · 20th Apr 2009, 09:29 AM

Yep, guilty of that too!

For a while I listened to sad songs which got me even more emotionally down. in particular after I told someone how I felt about him. Listening to songs often reminds me of things that could have been. Sometimes, I do tear up when I watch a sad movie or even if a movie has a really nice happy ending....

But here is the thing...if you hate them, why do you look at their pictures on facebook then? Try to move on. You have your life and they have theirs! If you keep doing that, the only person that is going to get even more hurt is you. No one else. What to do? Stop 'stalking' them on facebook. Get a boyfriend and enjoy your life! You know how to do it!

Dazed · 20th Apr 2009, 10:32 AM

maybe im weird ...when im sad i listen to happy music so i wont cry or be upset.

Mellowish · 20th Apr 2009, 11:47 PM

i think im weird cus when i feel happy (kinda not common) my thoughts push me back down and i kinda feel like im literally being choked

21st Apr 2009, 12:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lost Guy

i think im weird cus when i feel happy (kinda not common) my thoughts push me back down and i kinda feel like im literally being choked

I have the same issue. I do that all the time.

Nick · 21st Apr 2009, 02:22 AM

I have a playlist called ":'(" so it's mostly just listening to sad music for me.

pirateninja · 21st Apr 2009, 06:16 AM

Yeah, I have a "Sad Songs" Playlist on my iPod. Really great for those happy days that need a bit of balance

I know my dad loved listening to songs like "Every day I love you less and less" when Mom left him, and even now he listens to songs in the key of suicide (aka Coldplay). You're not the only one that does it; maybe it's a way of us being emotional, but in a private way? I know I don't like crying in front of others, so listening to sad songs is a way of being emotional, but we can blame it on the song (or film or whatever) rather than say to others or ourselves "I'm really upset".

Thisisnew · 21st Apr 2009, 04:14 PM

I do listen to songs that remind me of a bad time in my life and get emotional and cry the songs are not sad at all though. I told my brother that and he thought I was nuts lol.

Starshine16 · 21st Apr 2009, 09:20 PM

I do the exact same thing.I listen to really sad songs including the one that was supposed to be played at my wedding a year and a half ago.

Lychee · 22nd Apr 2009, 03:57 AM

I listen to sad songs.. Also I read "My Sister's Keeper" by Jodi Picoult, which is an absolutely brilliant book btw, but every single time I read it I cry, in fact, one of the pages is almost blurred out now from my tears.. :\

20th Apr 2009, 04:47 AM	#1
BeautifulStranger GaGa's Knight in Flaming Armor Full Member Gender: 여왕 Orientation: Boys Boys Boys Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Jukjeon-dong, Yongin-si Age: 20 Posts: 1,823 Join Date: Aug 2007	Emotional cutting? Not physical harm... but... Does anyone else have a habit of looking at pictures/reading letters/listening to music/whatever that'll hurt them emotionally and make them cry? I've recently developed a horrible addiction of stalking Mike and Terry's facebook pages and it's absolutely killing me... but I can't stop. The two are back together and are so blissful and gah... I hate them. __________________ Co-Founder of the 'Sailor Moon Made Me Gay' club EC's official Diva Extraordinaire Future 'Mr. Kellan Lutz' "Since women have vaginas, they also have drama to fill the void."

20th Apr 2009, 04:59 AM	#2
Maddy Free Hugs EC Admin Gender: - Orientation: Into girls Location: Melbourne, Australia Age: 21 Posts: 7,704 Join Date: Mar 2008	Re: Emotional cutting? I don't do it so much anymore, but yeah, I used to do that all the time. I still have a song that Kathryn wrote me when I was 16, and for easily a year I carried it around with me and read it all the time, despite the fact that it made me cry. (She told me afterwards that she'd written it while stoned and couldn't remember a thing about it. Nice to know that's what I'm worth.) __________________ how strange it is to be anything at all [Victor] 2:09 pm: and then halloween happened and I was outside in a skirt.

20th Apr 2009, 05:01 AM	#3
Just Adam Just passing through Full Member Gender: Something Orientation: Dunno Out Status: If they ask i will tell them Location: Wherever Age: 23 Posts: 6,002 Join Date: Mar 2009	Re: Emotional cutting? when i lost my mum i would listen to a song that upset me dont know why think i just wanted to try and feel __________________ There Used To Be A Point Of Things.

20th Apr 2009, 06:45 AM	#4
KaydeeJayde Well Known Regular Member Gender: Female Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: Some people Location: Melbourne, Australia Posts: 120 Join Date: Apr 2009	Re: Emotional cutting? I'm the same. I always listen to songs that make me cry, because it makes me deal with what I'm feeling. I know that if I don't do that, I'll find ways to avoid dealing with it. I also listen to songs that remind me of my ex also because it makes me remember all the good times, as well as singing the songs I wrote about her when we were together. And yeah, it hurts.

20th Apr 2009, 06:53 AM	#5
aerwolfen Well Known Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: and a few friends Location: winnipeg manitoba Age: 49 Posts: 178 Join Date: Mar 2009	Re: Emotional cutting? i think we all at some point in time just need to cry and get those depressed feelings out of our system,anxiety will cause us to be overwhelmed with feelings that sometimes is really hard to handle and the best release our body and mind provide is a good cry, i do many times even when i'm feeling happy,holding back feelings can really build up in the mind and its completely normal for those feelings to come out when you don't expect them too,. __________________ if your looking for me,when times are rough,and your feeling abit odd,jump onto my rainbow,it leads to cloud nine,no worries,I'll be there with open arms and a hug for peaceful bliss.

20th Apr 2009, 08:47 AM	#7
Courtneyyy ColbieMarie Full Member Gender: GIRL Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: Mom, brother and close friends Location: Flagstaff, AZ Age: 23 Posts: 975 Join Date: Jan 2009	Re: Emotional cutting? Sometimes I do things like that to make myself cry. I don't cry that much, but I get stressed out and upset easily. Once I cry it all out, I feel much better, so I'll do things that I know will get me to cry, even tho they aren't what's currently bothering me. __________________

20th Apr 2009, 09:24 AM	#8
GhostDog is Spartacus. Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: MAGICAL. Out Status: The hiiills are aliiive with the sound of muuusic! Location: DFW area, Texas Age: 24 Posts: 2,503 Join Date: Apr 2009	Re: Emotional cutting? I watch a movie called "The Sky Is Falling" (with Dedee Pfeiffer), especially whenever I'm feeling really shitty about myself. It makes me cry even more, but the ending is so happy, I end up feeling a lot better at the end! __________________ <3 Kirah, who may or may not be made of delicious candy (and the lesbians)

20th Apr 2009, 09:26 AM	#9
Eleanor Rigby Filip's sidekick EC Advisor Gender: Female Orientation: Straight Out Status: Out as straight ally Location: France Age: 32 Posts: 5,400 Join Date: Feb 2009	Re: Emotional cutting? Anything that makes me think about my best friend makes me cry. It could be songs, films, letters, drawings, books, anything related to him one way or another. In a way these things hurt me, and in a way they make me feel better by remembering all we used to be for each other. I keep the things that make me think about him in a box and from time to time, I open the box. And every time I know I will feel the pain again, and I will cry, but I carry this pain with me anyway and I think it is ealthier to express these feelings than keep it them inside all the time. I am also a very emotional girl. I can cry very easily watching a film or reading a book, but I think it is good to vent emotions out. I think that being able to let it go when that doesn't matter makes me able to cope with things and prevents me from falling appart when it is important that I behave myself. __________________ "Act in such a way that you treat humanity, whether in your own person or in the person of another, always at the same time as an end and never simply as a means." Immanuel Kant

20th Apr 2009, 09:29 AM	#10
Mirko Molitva Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out and about Location: British Columbia, Canada Age: 35 Posts: 10,052 Join Date: Apr 2008	Re: Emotional cutting? Yep, guilty of that too! For a while I listened to sad songs which got me even more emotionally down. in particular after I told someone how I felt about him. Listening to songs often reminds me of things that could have been. Sometimes, I do tear up when I watch a sad movie or even if a movie has a really nice happy ending.... But here is the thing...if you hate them, why do you look at their pictures on facebook then? Try to move on. You have your life and they have theirs! If you keep doing that, the only person that is going to get even more hurt is you. No one else. What to do? Stop 'stalking' them on facebook. Get a boyfriend and enjoy your life! You know how to do it! __________________ ~ Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are ~ Last edited by Mirko; 20th Apr 2009 at 09:34 AM..

20th Apr 2009, 10:32 AM	#11
Dazed Banned Gender: ladyfella Orientation: MaddyBensexual Out Status: out to all :] Location: Richmond VA Age: 24 Posts: 2,189 Join Date: Mar 2007	Re: Emotional cutting? maybe im weird ...when im sad i listen to happy music so i wont cry or be upset.

20th Apr 2009, 11:47 PM	#12
Mellowish rabblerabblerabble Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: i think i might be gay :O Out Status: only to you people Location: Los Angeles, Ca Age: 19 Posts: 152 Join Date: Apr 2009	Re: Emotional cutting? i think im weird cus when i feel happy (kinda not common) my thoughts push me back down and i kinda feel like im literally being choked

21st Apr 2009, 02:22 AM	#14
Nick was a pinstripe. Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: K4/5 ? Out Status: Some people Location: Melbourne, Australia Age: 20 Posts: 492 Join Date: Jun 2008	Re: Emotional cutting? I have a playlist called ":'(" so it's mostly just listening to sad music for me. __________________ "When it comes to exploring the sea of love, I prefer buoys" - Andrew G. Dehel

21st Apr 2009, 06:16 AM	#15
pirateninja EC's Sailor Uranus Full Member Gender: Biologically Female Orientation: Heterosexually Challenged Out Status: Most people Location: Bath, England Age: 21 Posts: 5,853 Join Date: Sep 2007	Re: Emotional cutting? Yeah, I have a "Sad Songs" Playlist on my iPod. Really great for those happy days that need a bit of balance I know my dad loved listening to songs like "Every day I love you less and less" when Mom left him, and even now he listens to songs in the key of suicide (aka Coldplay). You're not the only one that does it; maybe it's a way of us being emotional, but in a private way? I know I don't like crying in front of others, so listening to sad songs is a way of being emotional, but we can blame it on the song (or film or whatever) rather than say to others or ourselves "I'm really upset". __________________ Holly the Pirateninja Ars Longa, Vita Brevis.

21st Apr 2009, 04:14 PM	#16
Thisisnew EC Addict Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: All lesbian all the time!! Out Status: I...I guess it runs in the family! =] Location: NY Age: 20 Posts: 1,302 Join Date: Mar 2009	Re: Emotional cutting? I do listen to songs that remind me of a bad time in my life and get emotional and cry the songs are not sad at all though. I told my brother that and he thought I was nuts lol. __________________ Thank god for ipods and gays!

21st Apr 2009, 09:20 PM	#17
Starshine16 One Day At A Time Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Bisexual Out Status: All but grandmother and uncle Location: California Age: 26 Posts: 563 Join Date: Oct 2008	Re: Emotional cutting? I do the exact same thing.I listen to really sad songs including the one that was supposed to be played at my wedding a year and a half ago. __________________ "Awareness is the first step in learning to change."

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22nd Apr 2009, 03:57 AM	#18
Lychee EC Addict Full Member Gender: Spazmatazz Orientation: Friendspage Location: Contrabassoon Posts: 1,739 Join Date: Aug 2008	Re: Emotional cutting? I listen to sad songs.. Also I read "My Sister's Keeper" by Jodi Picoult, which is an absolutely brilliant book btw, but every single time I read it I cry, in fact, one of the pages is almost blurred out now from my tears.. :\ __________________ We we we so excited.