Hello, So I constantly repete situations/events, particularly conversations, in my head over and over. I do it to make sure I said what I wanted to, or to see what else I could have said in that situation. Sometimes the conversations/situations didn't even happen, but is based of things that really did or I saw somebody else have. However, quite a lot of times, the conversations can 'get out of control' and I can't stop repeating it. One conversation in particular is from 6 months ago. Nothing bad happened in the conversation, I just didn't say everything I wanted to. Anyway, but these different situations I have over and over are taking up a lot of my time. I miss out on current conversations/events thinking about the old ones, which means I need to ask them to repete or I just guess at what they said. I want a paid job, which means I need to focus, but I know from my volunteering position I would ''zone out'' quite a lot (when it wasn't busy, which was often) and think of these conversations/events. If the conversation was a bad one, then I can get quite angry at myself and forget to have fun when I'm supposed to be having fun (like a fun trip out). I was just wondering if anyone else had any tips to slow or stop having conversations/events over and over in my head, especially the ones I cannot return to? Thank-you.
I do something like this from time to time. As a teacher, I'm always rehearsing possible outcomes or conversations or practicing how to approach different situations in my head (and sometimes out loud). Sometimes I just need to hear things aloud in order to process what's going on, so I find myself rehearsing some types of social situations. I've also ran through or repeated past conversations in my mind to see what else I might have said or done differently, and just to clarify that the conversation was okay and that there was closure. I have anxiety (social & GAD), so I sometimes need to practice or repeat conversations or social situations in my mind or aloud as a way to clarify, process, and give myself closure. I think it's normal for most people to do that sometimes. However, if it takes control of your life, then I think it becomes a problem (especially if it's OCD related). The way I move on from certain conversations or social situations is to remind myself that it's all in the past; what's been said/done has been said/done, and we can't change that. But if it helps, it's okay to assess yourself and see how you might react differently if the conversation comes up again in the future. So try not to obsess about what's already happened, but look for ways that you might better prepare yourself for what's to come.
I'm exactly like that, and it sometimes gets me into a trap of overthinking that I'm screwing things up; especially with trying to get my name out there as an artist with lots of anxiety problems. Have you tried doing some sort of grounding technique when you feel cycling thoughts come on? Maybe that can help you slow down so you don't stress you out so much. One thing you can also try is, even though they're becoming grossly popular for the wrong reasons, a fidget device (like a cube or spinner) can help you focus your energy onto that instead of worrying about conversations or situations too much. However, if you feel it's consuming your life and making it difficult to get things done, then that's not healthy and it could be an OCD thing as Shoei said.
