Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered people coming out

Smiley1123 · 10th May 2009, 03:07 PM

Was the first person that you told, same sex or opposite sex? Why'd you choose this person? How'd it work out?

The first person I came out to was my best friend. She is a girl too but she was totally understanding :]

Apocalypte · 10th May 2009, 03:08 PM

Best friend - who is a gay male.

thebikelady · 10th May 2009, 03:11 PM

Boy(he's bi with a stronger leaning towards boys). He is my best friend and it went well.

Just Adam · 10th May 2009, 03:12 PM

i told a female friend i find it easyer than other guys as they are well a bit more well stereotypical straight :S

GhostDog · 10th May 2009, 03:12 PM

Same sex. I didn't pick her because of her gender, though. I'd already been coming to her with concerns about going into teaching, and I already knew her values were roughly comparable to mine. One evening I was feeling really, really terrible and confused and miserable and just sort of let it all out! And she was, and has been since, really, really sweet and helpful.

She's a fantastic person to talk to, because she questioned herself too, AND is a fine arts teacher in a bible belt state, so she's had some excellent input and advice as far as that goes. =D

xballetxbeautyx · 10th May 2009, 04:06 PM

My best friend, who is a girl. She was questioning herself around the same time as I started (though she's since decided that she's straight) so we had a few discussions about it.

**EM68** · 10th May 2009, 04:11 PM

The first person I came out to was a gay guy I went to high school with.

Kenko · 10th May 2009, 04:19 PM

The first person I told was a gay male I went to university with. I'm not bestest friends with him or anything, but I told him because he was gay.

Nodnarb · 10th May 2009, 04:36 PM

Outside of my family, the only person I have told is one of my male friends.

DexterMorgan · 10th May 2009, 05:20 PM

Opposite sex.
Now I think about though, I should have told my friend who is a gay male first. It would've been a wholeeeee lot better.

SwissBoy88 · 10th May 2009, 05:41 PM

Same sex. My best male friend

Shevanel · 10th May 2009, 06:01 PM

Same sex, it was my best friend Mike who is basically a huge redneck but we're like really close and I think it just really showed that you really can't generalize with people at all. He's a great friend.

theworld · 10th May 2009, 06:11 PM

Opposite, she just happened to be my best friend, and I had slowly been finding out what her feelings were on the topic were; they were all positive so I went for it.

KaydeeJayde · 10th May 2009, 06:11 PM

Opposite sex. My best friend. He's bi, so that made it a little easier, I think.

sean · 10th May 2009, 06:14 PM

Best male friend. He just thought it was funny I freaking out about it, when he thought it wasnt a big deal at all.

sheldonnicole · 10th May 2009, 07:42 PM

Same sex. Mainly because she was a lesbian, too, so she got it. and I suppose was my role model of the time.

Mirko · 10th May 2009, 09:29 PM

The first person I came out to was a really good male friend of mine.

Thisisnew · 10th May 2009, 09:33 PM

The only one who know's is my brother I knew he would understand.

Jonathan · 10th May 2009, 09:37 PM

The first person I told was my best friend (opposite sex).

tofuplease · 10th May 2009, 09:37 PM

same sex- shes been one of my closest friends since kindergarten and she'd been questioning as well.

on a similar topic, do you find it easier to come out to people who you've known for a long time or not as long?

View Poll Results: Opposite or Same Sex
Same	35	47.30%
Opposite	39	52.70%
Voters: 74. You may not vote on this poll

10th May 2009, 03:07 PM	#1
Smiley1123 It's just another day... Full Member Gender: FTM Orientation: Girls Out Status: Mom, some friends, ask and tell Location: New York City Age: 16 Posts: 482 Join Date: Jul 2008	Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? Was the first person that you told, same sex or opposite sex? Why'd you choose this person? How'd it work out? The first person I came out to was my best friend. She is a girl too but she was totally understanding :] __________________ There's always gonna be another mountain I'm always gonna wanna make it moveAlways gonna be a uphill battleSometimes I'm gonna have to lose

10th May 2009, 03:08 PM	#2
Apocalypte Ytse Jamming. Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Dublin, Ireland Age: 27 Posts: 2,217 Join Date: Oct 2008	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? Best friend - who is a gay male. __________________ "I like my beer cold...my TV loud...and my homosexuals flaming." - Homer Simpson

10th May 2009, 03:11 PM	#3
thebikelady EC Addict Regular Member Gender: Female Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: 9? Age: 28 Posts: 485 Join Date: Sep 2008	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? Boy(he's bi with a stronger leaning towards boys). He is my best friend and it went well.

10th May 2009, 03:12 PM	#4
Just Adam Just passing through Full Member Gender: Something Orientation: Dunno Out Status: If they ask i will tell them Location: Wherever Age: 23 Posts: 6,002 Join Date: Mar 2009	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? i told a female friend i find it easyer than other guys as they are well a bit more well stereotypical straight :S __________________ There Used To Be A Point Of Things.

10th May 2009, 03:12 PM	#5
GhostDog is Spartacus. Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: MAGICAL. Out Status: The hiiills are aliiive with the sound of muuusic! Location: DFW area, Texas Age: 24 Posts: 2,503 Join Date: Apr 2009	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? Same sex. I didn't pick her because of her gender, though. I'd already been coming to her with concerns about going into teaching, and I already knew her values were roughly comparable to mine. One evening I was feeling really, really terrible and confused and miserable and just sort of let it all out! And she was, and has been since, really, really sweet and helpful. She's a fantastic person to talk to, because she questioned herself too, AND is a fine arts teacher in a bible belt state, so she's had some excellent input and advice as far as that goes. =D __________________ <3 Kirah, who may or may not be made of delicious candy (and the lesbians)

10th May 2009, 04:06 PM	#6
xballetxbeautyx Heterodox Homosexual Full Member Gender: (.)(.) Orientation: Kinsey 5? Ish? Out Status: If you don't know, where have you been all my life Location: Midwest USA Age: 17 Posts: 1,719 Join Date: Mar 2008	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? My best friend, who is a girl. She was questioning herself around the same time as I started (though she's since decided that she's straight) so we had a few discussions about it. __________________ I can't go to Pigfarts! IT'S ON MARS. You need a rocketship! Do you have a rocketship, Potter? Look at this - it's Rocketship Potter! Starkid Potter! Moonshoes Potter! Traversing the galaxy for intergalactic travels to Pigfarts!

10th May 2009, 04:11 PM	#7
EM68 Happily Married! :) EC Moderator Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out and about. Location: Stoughton, Massachusetts USA Age: 43 Posts: 4,288 Join Date: Jun 2008	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? The first person I came out to was a gay guy I went to high school with. __________________ I'm beautiful in my way, 'Cause God makes no mistakes I'm on the right track, baby I was Born This Way -Lady Gaga

10th May 2009, 04:19 PM	#8
Kenko EC Addict Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: A few friends + parents Location: Canada Age: 26 Posts: 1,407 Join Date: Jan 2007	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? The first person I told was a gay male I went to university with. I'm not bestest friends with him or anything, but I told him because he was gay.

10th May 2009, 04:36 PM	#9
Nodnarb Notoriously Homosexual Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Most people Location: Ames, Iowa Age: 20 Posts: 3,875 Join Date: Oct 2007	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? Outside of my family, the only person I have told is one of my male friends. __________________ Better to be hated for who you are, than be loved for who you're not.

10th May 2009, 05:20 PM	#10
DexterMorgan The Lonely Stoner Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Santa Monica, CA, USA Age: 18 Posts: 657 Join Date: Feb 2009	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? Opposite sex. Now I think about though, I should have told my friend who is a gay male first. It would've been a wholeeeee lot better. __________________ Closets are for clothes; not me.

10th May 2009, 05:41 PM	#11
SwissBoy88 Charmed and Dangerous Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: best friend, MOM, some co-workers Location: Switzerland Age: 23 Posts: 6,721 Join Date: Jun 2008	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? Same sex. My best male friend __________________ Either one is free or one is not. The concept of freedom is an absolute. After all, one cannot be moderately dead, moderately loved, or moderately free. It must always remain a matter of either or. After all... I'm just a boy, standing in front of another boy, asking him to love him....

10th May 2009, 06:01 PM	#12
Shevanel One Is Light. One Is Dark. Full Member Gender: The Dude Orientation: Bi-Winning Out Status: Everybody and Your Mom. Location: Bolivar, Ohio (From NY though) Age: 21 Posts: 7,672 Join Date: Dec 2008	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? Same sex, it was my best friend Mike who is basically a huge redneck but we're like really close and I think it just really showed that you really can't generalize with people at all. He's a great friend. __________________ If there were no rewards to reap, No loving embrace to see me through this tedious path I've chosen here, I certainly would've walked away by now. Gonna wait it out... Be patient.

10th May 2009, 06:11 PM	#13
theworld Well Known Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Oregon Age: 21 Posts: 209 Join Date: Jan 2009	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? Opposite, she just happened to be my best friend, and I had slowly been finding out what her feelings were on the topic were; they were all positive so I went for it.

10th May 2009, 06:11 PM	#14
KaydeeJayde Well Known Regular Member Gender: Female Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: Some people Location: Melbourne, Australia Posts: 120 Join Date: Apr 2009	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? Opposite sex. My best friend. He's bi, so that made it a little easier, I think. __________________ ~. Love is Love .~

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10th May 2009, 06:14 PM	#15
sean Member Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: 4 people Location: Los Angeles Age: 20 Posts: 18 Join Date: Sep 2008	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? Best male friend. He just thought it was funny I freaking out about it, when he thought it wasnt a big deal at all.

10th May 2009, 07:42 PM	#16
sheldonnicole Superhero Regular Member Gender: Female Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Michigan, US Posts: 16 Join Date: May 2009	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? Same sex. Mainly because she was a lesbian, too, so she got it. and I suppose was my role model of the time.

10th May 2009, 09:29 PM	#17
Mirko Molitva Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out and about Location: British Columbia, Canada Age: 35 Posts: 10,052 Join Date: Apr 2008	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? The first person I came out to was a really good male friend of mine. __________________ ~ Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are ~

10th May 2009, 09:33 PM	#18
Thisisnew EC Addict Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: All lesbian all the time!! Out Status: I...I guess it runs in the family! =] Location: NY Age: 20 Posts: 1,302 Join Date: Mar 2009	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? The only one who know's is my brother I knew he would understand. __________________ Thank god for ipods and gays!

10th May 2009, 09:37 PM	#19
Jonathan Formerly Muzzy Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Some people Location: Illinois Age: 20 Posts: 3,036 Join Date: Oct 2007	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? The first person I told was my best friend (opposite sex). __________________

10th May 2009, 09:37 PM	#20
tofuplease Member Regular Member Gender: Female Orientation: gay Out Status: Basically everyone. except most of my relatives Location: Northern California Age: 18 Posts: 71 Join Date: Feb 2009	Re: Coming Out...Same Sex or Opposite Sex First? same sex- shes been one of my closest friends since kindergarten and she'd been questioning as well. on a similar topic, do you find it easier to come out to people who you've known for a long time or not as long?