Okay... here's another thread I'm starting to see if it will spark conversation, because the boards have been pretty dead. Have any of you come out to someone, expecting some sort of reaction.... good, bad, happy, sad, shocked, surprised, something! and when you get up the nerve to say it, and have actually laid yourself on the chopping board, they basically just nod, and continue with the previous conversation? WTF? I want some fanfare! I want bells and whistles, fireworks, and TNT detonating in the background! Tonight, I told my first friend from college that I was gay. I lived with him abroad in Rome last semester, and we had a little Rome roomate dinner with me, him and our other two roomates; one girl, one guy. The other guy new already, as he's my best friend from camp as well. Either way... I said it, and they both just sort of went on with the conversation... I'm not sure, they may have blinked... but just once... and it may have been because it was dusty in the restaurant... not really sure. The girl eventually started incorporating questions about it into the conversation, but the guy just went on talking to me like I didn't even say anything. It was just like before I came out, but now he knew... it felt a bit like the twilight zone. Don't you think after getting over the anxiety of telling, you should have your moment to shine?!?!?!?!??!?! Just a thought... write back.
Okay, I totally feel ya! I've only come out to 4 people, one being my best male (straight too) friend. When I finally built up the courage to tell him I was bi and did so, he was just like, okay, and it basically ended there. I was like "What, no shock or questioning or anything?!" He simply said it didn't bother him a bit and that he'd been in weirder situations. I was kinda disappointed to be honest cause I wanted to start from the beginning and answer a whole bunch of questions! haha but I was pretty grateful he understood and thought nothing of it...
I haven't had that experience w/ any of my friends or family, but I did talk about being gay during one of my interviews for school, and my interviewer was clearly uncomfortable w/ the topic at hand and changed the subject quickly. That was sort of weird.
JonB321: What happened after THAT--with the relationship, I mean? That's a major "denial" reaction. Usually accompanied with some "sideways" nastiness later.
Maybe it was like what one of my non-fanfare friends told me: "You being gay is like me being Asian." It totally pissed me off at the time but now I think it's the most hilarious thing ever. Because really, I've never been all that straight. I did sometimes want people to be as into my sexuality as I was when I was coming out. And I think most of my friends realised it was a super big deal to me and reacted appropriately. Probably mainly because I was like, "OH MY FUCKING GOD you will not BELIEVE what I'm about to tell you!!! (Just a second while I hyperventilate a bit.) Right... now where was I? Oh right... the Internet is about to crack in half (not that we really had the Internet when I came out)... wait for it... I'M... you're never going to believe this, I swear! I'M... no really, it's monumental... right... I'm GGGGGGGGAY!!!!" Actually, I was never that bad. But it was a pretty big deal the first 200 times or so. *grin*
Deal! I'll pay you 10% of ALL the money I make directly from coming out in a similar fashion to your own. lol.
Hmm, in my experience when people react with just 'oh, ok' they are either really cool about it, which is good, but not likely, or they are uncomfortable to they point that they can't even react out of fear of hurting you. that's why when I come out to people I usually tell them: 'ask whatever you want, no question you ask (regarding this particular issue) will make me uncomfortable or hurt me, and I will try to answer them all with the truth', actually in spanish it's a bit more poetic, but I'm tired and cold now.
