Ex-gay heterosexuals

That pisses me off

That just really pisses me off. Sure those people want to be "normal", and not have to be pressured to coming out and destroying their family lives, but I would never change who I am. And I truely think it is a temporary solution, homosexuality is a genetic thing, and you cant change it by going to some damn camp. If someone signed me up on one of those, I would go, but I would have sex with every man in that camp. I wouldnt let them go straight. I know that sounds slutty, but I just dont have the same morals as alot of people. I just really hate it when people dont have pride about themselves, the prideless people is what we should call them! Hehe, j/k

 

Wow, this kind of thing really scares me... Has anybody seen "But I'm A Cheerleader"? (Crappy movie, but about this)

I honestly can't believe there are people today (and especially gay people) who believe that it can be 'cured' or whatever.

I don't know about homosexuality being 'genetic'. However, it is a deeply ingrained thing. Sexuality and sexual orientation is in our nature for us to find the best partner with which to create a younger version containing our genes (having kids). That's why we find certain things attractive and other unattractive. It's definitely deeply built in and can't be changed by spending a summer with a bunch of homophobic idiots. That's why I think homosexuality can be classified as a kind of 'disorder' (because it's breaking the 'order' of things and have men attracted to men, women to women) but it's "cure" would be very difficult (maybe impossible).

My favorite explanation for homosexuality is that it is a natural population control. There's always a percentage of people who are gay (let's say 5% or 10%); then, if there's a small population struggling to grow a survive there will be very few gay people. And, these gay people will most likely still get married and have children (like gay people have been doing throughout the ages in humanity). But, if it's a huge population (like 6.5 billion humans) then there will be a huge number of gay people (let's say 650 million) and so it helps keep the population down. Also, I think it's a 'natural population control' because I, personally, have felt different from other people because I'm gay, but NEVER 'abnormal'. ... but this should really be written in a 'cause of homosexuality' thread which appear every so often...

My point: you can't 'choose' homosexuality or to 'leave homosexuality'. You can deny yourself and your true feelings... but then you'll likely be tormented and mentally disturbed. But, if you can honestly find a way to live pretending to be straight... go for it! For me, I can't do that (anymore, lol). ... I think it implies a longing to belong (which is stupid) and homophobia in a way. A lot of homophobic people, I guess, just don't understand.

 

The whole problem with the ex-gay movement is that is presupposes that being gay is a bad thing. That might not be homophobic, depending on how it's spun, but it's certainly heterosexist. I think the only argument one could conceivably make for being gay being a bad thing is that it's bad precisely because of homophobia and heterosexism. That is, yes, it's easier to be straight and not face that kind of discrimination but it's the discrimination that's the problem, not the being gay part.

And frankly, if in this society and in this day and age you have to WORK at being heterosexual, there is something much more wrong with you than being gay. Being het in society is about the easiest thing there is. If you have to work at it, chances are it's REALLY not your thing. :icon_smil

 

*DISCLAIMER* This might sound strange coming from a gay jew.

While I am personally opposed to the entire concept of trying to repress one's sexuality, I think we, the gay community, are a bit cocky here to think it is all about us. First of all, the root of the idea that homosexuality is bad stems mainly from the Judeo-Christian Bible. While we jews don't have such clear cut divisions between heaven, hell, or an afterlife in general, Christians do. While I believe you are born gay, and there is no denying that sexuality is a huge influence on the way you think and act, there is also no denying that religion, something that you yourself chose to embrace, has a huge influence on the way you think and act. If someone actually believes that acting on their homosexual desires, they are going to be sent to the worst place that they could possibly imagine, I don't really see what is so wrong with trying to live a heterosexual lifestyle. What we need to take offence to is the idea that God has deemed our lifestyle evil.

The people who preach this form of "therapy" are the same ones who preach abstinance until marriage, sexual intercourse only for the sake of having children, and they are the people who take a fervantly pro-life stance (unless you're talking about the death penalty, in which case they're usually for it, go figure).

While I don't agree with any of those things, I do agree with the fact that people should have the right to believe them. What miffs me is that they don't seem to have that opinion about our beliefs.

I hope this made some sense... it's really late right now, and I'm tired...

 

Is this proof enough?

Okay, so you want me to prove it, let me just ask you this, why are we born that way, if we dont choose it, witch some do, then how are we gay? Genes make up a human being, they create everything about them, including thier sexual oreintation. I have tons af gay, lesbian, and bisexual cousins. My 2nd oldest brother is too. So if thats not proof enough for you bitchy ass, j/k, then I dont know what would be. I am a strong follower so science, so yeah, thats the facts. :eusa_danc

 

Actually, those aren't really the facts. Thus far, there hasn't been a gay gene, or a series of genes linked to sexuality. That being said, most accepted scientific stances on homosexuality do include genetics, but not only genetics. There is a good amount of study going into hormone levels in the womb. Most of the stuff coming back shows that in the wombs of children who end up gay, there were elevated levels of certain hormones over others.

And who exactly chooses to be gay? I've never met anyone who has.

To be perfectly honest, I think if they find a reason why we're gay, they will be able to get rid of us completely via embrionic screenings, so I'm not really hoping for that medical advancement any time soon.

 

I always find myself asking, "who cares what 'makes' us gay?" Because really, who does it harm if 10% (or 5% or 20%) of the population likes getting it on with people of the same gender?

The fervent desire to prove homosexuality has genetic roots is a bad red herring both ways. If it IS genetic, then it can assumedly be screened for and eradicated through science. If it ISN'T genetic, then people who say it's a "choice" have more ammunition.

The only point is that who cares if it's a choice? What's so wrong about it if it is? Christianity is a choice, as are all religions, and they're protected and venerated in most Western democracies. The problem isn't whether homosexuality is a genetic compulsion. The problem is why homosexuality is considered dirty/evil/sinful/etc. Arguments for or against a genetic origin are ultimately completely unproductive and a waste of time.

And I have read of some people who do choose to be gay. I don't think it would be that common but I don't think it's a fantasy someone made up. I mean, if you consider being gay simply the behaviour of having sex with people of the same gender, heck anyone could choose to do that. Why they would is another question, but it most certainly could be done.

 

Excellent posts Joey and Motionmaker - I fully agree with you both.

 

Something i've always wondered:
Identical twins are genetically identical right?
So if you found some twins where only one of the two was gay, wouldn't this prove that there wasn't a gay gene?

 

well... that would get a little tricky because there is genetic mater that differs between identical twins. This is especially true of mitochondria, which have their own genetic material. This does not have to be identical between identical twins. Another important thing to remember is that small genetic mutations that occur in the early stages of the embryo or fetus can cause dramatic differences in grown adults. Lastly, most scientists have come to believe it's not a gay gene, but a series of genes that interact with each other, to predispose a person to be this way or that way... the genes would also be affected by hormone levels, and external stimulae... particularly strong memories... etc. etc.

 

wow, thats deep. I do believe that if people can understand what makes a person gay, they wont be so against the idea. I think people are scared because they either dont know if they are gay themselves, or they think that something "bad or evil" makes people gay. Therefore, if it can be proved that the circumstances that make a person gay are uncontrollable, people will be less likely to be against gay people.

 

You take for granted that people believe facts and figures. There is a large portion of the world that still believes that God created the earth in 6 days, and rested on the seventh. These people also believe that unicorns once existed, however, they perished in the flood due to a poorly timed game of hide and go seek with Noah (I swear someone once argued that point with me). Besides, to many people, genetics and explainations are "bad or evil".

 

There have been some interesting studies on this. Apparently, if one identical twin is gay, the chance that the other is as well is about 50%. So, that's much higher than just the chance of one random person being gay (4-10% depending on which studies you read), but still quite far from the 100% that would be necessary if it was entirely genetic. Of course, it's all very complicated since twins were in the same womb and are usually raised in the same household, but as anybody who knows can tell you, often turn out to have very different personalities.

 

Well, we have a pair of gay, identical twins at my school....so take that however you want, but keep in mind that twins are raised in the same household under pretty much the same conditions. Additionally they can influence each other quite a lot.