Experiences with homophobia...

[guacj]

I want to hear stories of peoples experiences with homophobia. Heres mine.

After a group of friends and myself went out to the club one night we went to get something to eat. This group of drunk guys sat at the table behind us and there was one guy who was extremely obnoxious. He was loud and kept calling his friends "fagots." this was the first time that I have ever been enraged by this. I wast out to the friends I was with so I didn't say anything but I wanted to so badly.

This came from my own brother:

We were sitting around and I had a friend over. A Wendy's comercial came on and after it was over I commented. "I dont like what Wendy's has done with their commercials. The founder (the old guy) dies and automatically they switch to comedy comercials. I miss their traditional commercials with the old guy and just the simple message that the place was oldfasion."

My bri]other then had the bright idea of speaking before thinking.

"Yeah its like Disney. They used to have family values. Walt Disney dies and then They throw all their family values out the window by hiring Gay people. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA..."

I gave him a bank stare. My friend knows Im gay, and he saw my face and didnt laugh which I love him for. My brother was the only one laughing. I pawned him by speaking my opinioin and my friend told him that what he said was messed up.

You should have said something, trust me it feels GOOOOOOD. Its even better when your friends are there because you know they have your back and even if your not out to them, they know where you stand on the subject and you can begin a conversation on the matter. Homophobia is nothing to get mad or irrtated about, I see it as an opportunity to triumph over ignorance.

[kettleoffish]

I've only ever had verbal, but my ex got beaten up a few times for it. It's utterly disgraceful.

[Greggers]

I was at the movie theater watching something with Ryan Reynolds in it and i said to my friend beside me "OMG he is so hot, i would jump him right now" or something along those lines (very common for me to say, in public or private). Well, some jackass a few seats behind me decided to throw popcorn at me and wisper something about me being a "faggot" to his friends.

Ive also been honked at and called a faggot just walking down the street as well as had an iced coffee drink thrown at my head while being called a faggot on that same street. The drink missed at least.

I can handle that kind of homophobia. Its people i dont know, nor do i care one bit for. Ive had much more scaring experiences of my so called "friends" being homophobic.

This summer when i was at a campfire with some of my friends one of them decided to make this horrible gay joke that was something along the lines of "Why are gay people so <blank>" and i cant remember the blank, but it was NOT a good <blank>. This was with a group of people i was 100% out to. And still, in front of my face, he decided to make this joke. Well, as i went to FUCK HIS FACE UP with my hiking boots, another friend of mine did it for me. With words, alas. His response was something like "Greg is cool, he does not care". And that just about sent me over the bend.

Ive had much worse when i was closeted such as my friends getting a teacher fired for spreading one too many gay rumors, or having to listen to being gay is "worse than being a pedophile". The number of times i had "fag" written on my binders as a "joke". The number of times i had to listen to "This pencil is so gay. This homework is so gay. School is so gay.". It was just relentless.

Id share more, but ive shared most of my stories over 25 times on various threads already :P

[Pseudojim]

Well, some jackass a few seats behind me decided to throw popcorn at me and wisper something about me being a "faggot" to his friends.

This is the kind of thing i am afraid is going to send me over the edge and cause me to punch someone in the face multiple times. I have a pretty bad temper when it comes to shit like that.

[xballetxbeautyx]

I had just gotten my pride shirt at Hot Topic, and I was wearing it and walking with some friends in an outdoor shopping center. One of the other girls, straight but supportive, was wearing a rainbow armband. And as we were walking by this woman with her daughter gives us a horrible look, skirts around, and mutters something about 'the lesbians'.

I had a girl ask my best friend 'why she was friends with the bi'. And I've gotten so much crap for having two moms. But from some of these stories, I have it easy.

There's this guy who unfortunately sits right behind me in history, and I always hear him say stuff like "fag," "queer," "homo," etc to his friend. I really want to turn around, give him a big smile, and flip him off while wearing my pride ring. And then he goes and asks me if I want to be in his group for a group project. "Um, not really..."

[xequar]

Probably my worst ones have been getting pulled over by the police because I have Pride decals on my car, and getting my car keyed (likely because of aforementioned decals).

[Terry]

I dont have many friends, well i have 2, but one is extremely homophobic. This friend, i do care about since we been friends for over 8 years and as time as gone one and as i recently see the truth to who i am and accept who I am...i noticed all the things this friend does. Like, he verbally says "eww" when he sees something gay on tv, even in public when in the cinema! He does it for a lot of things but i lost faith in him when the subject of gays got brought up and i asked him about it. Of the many things he said, one of them was that he could not understand how people can be like that and it is extremely closed minded that gay people are like this.

I asked him a while ago that if i was gay (yea of course he doesnt know what i am), would he still be around. First thing he said was he would run off but might come to his senses later. I care for the dude but its like i will never be able to tell the guy.

so yea....my only experience of homophobia was by a close friend, even if it is indirectly to me...sigh

[Steve]

Originally Posted by Terry

I dont have many friends, well i have 2, but one is extremely homophobic. This friend, i do care about since we been friends for over 8 years and as time as gone one and as i recently see the truth to who i am and accept who I am...i noticed all the things this friend does. Like, he verbally says "eww" when he sees something gay on tv, even in public when in the cinema! He does it for a lot of things but i lost faith in him when the subject of gays got brought up and i asked him about it. Of the many things he said, one of them was that he could not understand how people can be like that and it is extremely closed minded that gay people are like this.

I asked him a while ago that if i was gay (yea of course he doesnt know what i am), would he still be around. First thing he said was he would run off but might come to his senses later. I care for the dude but its like i will never be able to tell the guy.

so yea....my only experience of homophobia was by a close friend, even if it is indirectly to me...sigh

hm not alot of people will go running off when they hear your gay even when they say so. thing is people might get a bit itched off at the start but then the use the biggest gift of god the brain and say

" he didnt bother me before , why should he now ? " and come to their senses

[Terry]

Originally Posted by Steve

hm not alot of people will go running off when they hear your gay even when they say so. thing is people might get a bit itched off at the start but then the use the biggest gift of god the brain and say

" he didnt bother me before , why should he now ? " and come to their senses

Maybe but i dunno, its the things he said like "they should just wait for a girl" or like he does not get the concept of love and thinks its or sexual. meh i cant remember everything he said. i kind of let it all go...well suppressed it and moved on.

feelings suck!

[guacj]

I think that alot of guys fear that people might think that accepting homosexuals is emasculating. Or at least they think to let their other guy friends know makes them less of a "man." I know alot of people that do not agree with homosexuality, but still accept gay people as their friends. I have also seen alot of gay people break off friendships with those who want to be their friends and still think that their personal lives are wrong or immoral. I bet that if you told him he would accept you, but this is a decision that you would have to make for yourself. You are the only one that knows him in this discussion. Just realize that many think that being gay is taboo and that affects alot of people who want to show acceptance, but fear that they will not be accepted for their own decisions.

[Terry]

Friends suck lol. I dont think i can ever tell him anyway, neither can i tell my parents. I just want to start a clean slate and see if i can find new people (hah! my social skills suck and im scared of everything) but just retain these other people in the distance since telling them will cause everything to break (im muslim).

Thanks for your words though, just have to see what happens really.

[MusicIsLife]

Ive had a few instances.

One of my closest friends told me this not long after I came out:

"I don't want to be seen with you when you have those "gay things" on (wristband and pin) because i dont want anyone assuming that i'm lesbian too."
I didnt say anything then, but we did a lot of talking and shes put it behind her now.

And I got harassed at a hardcore show by two guys when I confronted them on calling the bass player of one of the bands a "faggot"

[Katherine]

I've dealt with a few.

Girl: Hey, are you gay?
Me: Yes.
Girl: Seriously?
Me: Yes.
Girl: Seriously? Man, when'd you turn gay?
Me (tempted to respond, but deciding not to): ...
Girl (turning away from me): Jeez, everyone's turning gay. It's so gross!

and then...

Guy: You're a lesbian?
Me: Yep.
Guy: Really? You don't look manly enough!
Me: You don't have to look manly to be a lesbian.
Guy: But how d'you know for sure? Like, are you still a virgin?
Me (a little surprised): Yes. Wait a second, that's none of your business!
Guy: So how do you know that you wouldn't wanna have sex with a guy? Like, if you've never TRIED it....
Me: Well, are YOU straight?
Guy: Yeah.
Me: Do YOU need to try to have sex with a guy to know it isn't appealing?
Guy: Ugh, no! That's different!

[RaeofLite]

Hmm, let's see...

-Been called dyke/lesbian out of a car on a few occasions (I think those cowards are pitiful. They can't even drive by slowly they have to do it fast, lol)

-some girls immediately get up and leave if I enter a room, sit at a table or area on campus

-guys: so how many guys have you been with? Did one break your heart or something
->me: no. I've been with a few guys. And I knew I was into girls when I was little.
-guys friend mutter: she just needs to get f***ed properly
...

I'm pretty fortunate though from what I've heard some people's encounters with homophobia...

[guacj]

Ok so I work at a large retail store and the other day someone was paying with a credit card and was having issues with the signature pad and called it a fucking faggot. Why is everyone so obsessed with using the word faggot in a derogatory way?

[Pseudojim]

Originally Posted by guacj

Ok so I work at a large retail store and the other day someone was paying with a credit card and was having issues with the signature pad and called it a fucking faggot. Why is everyone so obsessed with using the word faggot in a derogatory way?

i wish i could go back in time and take issue with this in school. i stood up for the gay kid, which i am proud of, but i never bothered to point out people's insensitivity when using homophobia as a general epithet

[carrie90]

Hmm well I guess my worst experiance was a jock backing me up against the lockers and asking whats wrong with me and why I don't like dick as he put it but I reported it straight away and he got expelled I don't let people push me around

The rest was the usual bitchy comments and general small minded ignorance

[Pseudojim]

Originally Posted by carrie90

hmm Well I Guess My Worst Experiance Was A Jock Backing Me Up Against The Lockers And Asking Whats Wrong With Me And Why I Don't Like Dick As He Put It But I Reported It Straight Away And He Got Expelled

YES! totally awesome