Why would gay guys be attracted to feminine guys (Poll included)?

[Camman3]

It's a complete enigma to me...

I'm a guy, but I'm attracted to stereotypical masculine features in a guy. I am not personally interested in feminine-acting guys... It just seems to take the whole "guy" element out of it.

I just wanted your thoughts =) Please keep this a chilled thread people! I don't want anyone hating on effiminate guys or anything! (I know some "effemophobic gay guys...)

EDIT: Forgot to add "I am NOT an "effiminophobe" to the poll list - if you wudn't mind just adding that to your comment =)

[lostinthought9]

Hmm...I agree with you about being sexually attracted to "manly" men.

However, your poll is a little off. I can't vote that I understand effiminate gay men, but I can vote that I wouldn't date them, and that I'm not an effiminophobe, all at the same time. Understand what I mean? Unless you just wanted us to post our views...

[Pseudojim]

it depends on what you mean.

i like pretty men who LOOK kinda like chicks.

i DON'T like men who act very effeminate.

[Ben]

I added the "I am not an effiminophobe" option for you.

I like effeminate men just as much as I like masculine men I think.
If anything is unattractive it's really blokey guys who I can't relate to in the slightest.

[Owen]

Originally Posted by Pseudojim

it depends on what you mean.

i like pretty men who LOOK kinda like chicks.

i DON'T like men who act very effeminate.

This. I can't really explain it, but I also like men who look effeminate, but am turned off by men who act overly flamboyant. Granted, I can often look past these kinds of things, but it certainly helps if they act masculine.

Id rather have a manlyish man than a effeminate man. Although if they have a good personality and that I couldn't careless if they were unless they are right at the very end of the scale.

[NickT]

I'm attracted to guys, not girls. As such, I'm rather turned off by really effeminate gay guys. However, that's not to say I wouldn't date a moderately effeminate guy.

Still, that's also not to say I'm into the whole "what makes a man" thing. Things like "man laws" and "machismo" really piss me off.

[partietraumatic]

im really attracted to effeminate guys. i dont find manly guys attractive atall,i prefer guys who you would say are pretty rather than handsome,not well built,less body hair etc etc.

and i have dated one,so that made choosing my option on the pole fairly easy

[Paragon]

heres my theory, dont hate!
a gay man is the result of the brain of a straight woman in a mans body forced to develop from birth

Gah. I had a nice reply all written out and accidentally closed the window. So, to sum up what I wrote before:

Neither masculinity nor femininity bother me when in moderate amounts. It's when they're in extreme amounts that I start to get turned off.

Edit: ^ Disagree, disagree, disagree! I am NOT a woman. If I were, I'd be transgendered, now wouldn't I? I may have many more similarities with straight women than a straight man, but I am still male!

[Greggers]

Originally Posted by Paragon

heres my theory, dont hate!
a gay man is the result of the brain of a straight woman in a mans body forced to develop from birth

That has been proved for many a gay man. They take x-rays of the brain and whatnot and a large number of gay men have brains that are shaped like that of a womans. However, like most things, this is not the case for all gay men. When it is the case, its not exactly a "straight women trapped in a mans body" either though, thats transgendered. I think some men just have a brain that is *like* a woman's and that leads them to be more feminine, with varying degrees.

*cough* Anyways, back to the topic shall we?

I am extremely attracted to feminine guys, and i *am* a feminine guy myself. When it comes down to it, i am sexually attracted to many MANY different types of guys. However i can only see myself with a more feminine guy when i think about myself in a relationship. Im open to a relationship with any type of guy though.

I like feminine guys because i want someone who is emotional and is not afraid to show it and talk about it. I want someone who is "pretty". I dont really know how to describe it, but alot of guys are lean, soft skin, "gay face", ect. Thats the kind of guy i see myself with.

There are a few people who are not that feminine i could see myself with, however. But none of those people are particularly "masculine" either. Most of those people fall under the "artist/musician/writer" category that i tend to swoon for...

Originally Posted by Drizzt DoUrden

Disagree, disagree, disagree! I am NOT a woman. If I were, I'd be transgendered, now wouldn't I? I may have many more similarities with straight women than a straight man, but I am still male!

Hear, Hear! I agree.

[Paragon]

Y'all missunderstood me.....

[Ben]

I wouldn't go as far as to say we have the same brains, as that might imply transgenderism, but I would agree that the sexuality of a gay man is the same sexuality as a straight women (being attracted to men).

[Camman3]

1) I'm sorry that my thread is kind of black and white in the options (thank goodness for the option to post!) - I realised that, but couldn't really phrase it much differently, otherwise there'd be 20 poll options if you know what I mean...

2) Yeah, I know about the brain part, but I still function like a male... so that begs the question how the "female" brain in us still "knows you're a dude". =) Interesting...

And thanks for the "upgrade" Invisible!

[Just Adam]

i dont care...

id rather a flex guy can be tender and and yet supportive... overly fem dont do it for it me and overly macho dont either...i would either get fed up of having to be the strong guy in charge and equally i dont think i could take beeing the lesser guy feeling lesser.

ive nothign against guys that are like that thats them ...aslong as they dont judge me its all good...even if rare..

s to the title question why would you want a fem guy well you may like teh fem attitude but not the parts.

[Paragon]

Originally Posted by Camman3

2) Yeah, I know about the brain part, but I still function like a male... so that begs the question how the "female" brain in us still "knows you're a dude"

because its there from birth, your raised male.

[olides84]

Originally Posted by Invisible

I wouldn't go as far as to say we have the same brains, as that might imply transgenderism, but I would agree that the sexuality of a gay man is the same sexuality as a straight women (being attracted to men).

But that's the whole point here. Straight women don't all like the same guys - some like tough, burly, masculine guys; others would like more sensitive, kinder, cute guys. So as straight women can be all over the spectrum, gay guys can be the same. Look, everyone has preferences, that's totally understood. What I get annoyed with are statements like "I am gay, ergo I like men, ergo I can only like masculine men." Attraction is never that simple.

People are attracted to different things. It's not different than asking "why would a MAN LIKE A MAN?!" or "Why would a person like a transsexual?!?!" People just like what they like. I haven't been attracted to a super femmy male, but who knows? I think my boyfriend is a "pretty boy". lmao.

[ethelred]

I could go either way, really. As long as there are no emotional walls in that "macho" sense, I'm good.

I consider myself a little flaming, anyway, just been strapping that part of my personality down since, like, sixth grade or so. I do have to say I could certainly have a lot of fun socially with an effeminate guy.