Until a few weeks ago I was working as an IT Analyst for a company around an hour’s drive from home. Prior to that I had worked as an R&D Engineer at the same place. I left because I was getting fed up with being on the bottom rung of corporate IT and also found the travelling and early mornings tiring. I got a new job at a very small company run by someone I had worked with previously, very close to home. I mentioned it here http://emptyclosets.com/forum/showthread.php?t=289. This seemed great, but there is one major problem. Because it is run from the owner’s home, whenever he is away on business (or pleasure) I am expected to work from home. This is not going down at all well with my partner – and I think it may be insurmountable as the boss is unmovable. I am not prepared to let any job affect my relationship with my partner. Earlier this week I was contacted by a manager at the old company, saying there was a vacancy again as an R&D Engineer (the person who took over from me has resigned). I am wondering whether or not to apply for it. Although it would solve the immediate problem, I would still have the travelling to contend with, I would still be working under the same person as when I was in that position before (who is not an effective section leader), and I would still have no career path. I don’t want to go back to doing all that travelling (and working for that section leader), but I think it is still preferable to jeopardising our relationship. Also the idea of going back to work for a company only two months after leaving seems awkward. The chances of getting another suitable job closer to home are slim (I had been looking for months previously). I have replied to the manager’s email with my concerns. He is someone I got along very well with, so I trust him and respect his opinion. What do you guys think I should do?
I think if I were in your shoes, I would first try talking to your current boss. Explain that working from home is tearing your home life apart. Tell him how if you have to continue working from home that you'll be forced to leave the job. I imagine it would be good to have some of the details about why it's difficult to be at home all the time ready in case he asks for them, but it how much you'll actually say depends on how comfortable your boss is with you being gay. Perhaps a solution can be found where you can continue to work at his house while he's gone. Or maybe the boss is considering moving out of his house into a normal office in the near future and you can wait it out. The bottom line though is that he can't do anything for you unless he knows about the problem and how serious it is. If you're doing a good job, he's probably not going to want to lose you and hopefully can find some way to accomodate your needs. Above all, I really think you shouldn't go back to your old job. There are reasons why you left (which haven't changed it sounds like) and they must have been pretty compelling or you would have continued putting up with the job. If everything else fails, I'd say put in serious effort to locating another job. Also, is it possible for you to move closer to an area where there are perhaps more jobs (like where the old job is located)?
I am wondering what types of problems you have working from home? Is your current boss gone a lot? I'm not in your shoes, but I'd definitely try working things out with this job before you go looking for another. I'd think working close by would help you be more productive and lively during your off work hours.
Yeah... I'm confused as to what is so untenable about working from home. It's a balancing act, I'm sure... but... well, what are the issues?
My partner is very much against me working at home. I think it has something to do with a previous relationship where he worked at the same place as his partner and they had problems because they were together too much of the time. He doesn't want to discuss it, and just the mention of working at home seems to upset him. There is a specific issue there which he doesn't want to discuss and seems to be distressing for him. He works afternoons and evenings, and often goes to bed fairly late and gets up late. He likes to do his own thing during the day (friends having round, watching DVDs, playing loud music, eating junk food, cleaning and cooking etc). We don't have anywhere that could be set up as a separate home office so I would be working in the lounge, bedroom, kitchen or whatever. I would be in his way, and he would be in my way. I also don't like working at home. Without a separate area it doesn't feel like I am at work and I can't really get on with things. From speaking to the boss yestertoday it seems that there is no choice there (I don't understand why I can't continue to use the office there which is in an extension to his house, but it's his home and company). I am going to try to speak to him again next week but I think that is unmovable. His home-office is new, so there won't be any plans to move to a separate office any time soon. I don't mind working in R&D at the old company again. The move to IT was a mistake as far as I am concerned - I was dealing with too much corporate crap with a management structure at different sites who I rarely met (it's a division of an American corporate). I had asked the manager (the person who contacted me) if there were any vacancies back in R&D before I left, but at the time there weren't. At least in R&D I was dealing with people and products at the local site. The main issue there is the section leader - the person who was my immediate boss in R&D. He was utterly useless, completely indecisive and incapable of organising himself (and his insulin level) let alone anyone else. I really do not want to be working under him again. This is one thing I have asked the manager about - whether mmy reporting structure could be different so that the waste-of-space was bypassed. The other issue is the travelling. The driving itself is OK - it's just the amount of time it takes out of the day, so by the end of the week I was knackered. Although in IT I was working stupidly long hours too (with no overtime pay), whereas R&D would be back to a 37 hour week. Petrol cost is an issue, which would have to be considered in salary discussions. I think the chances of anything suitable closer to home coming along soon are remote. I have been keeping an eye on the local job adverts etc for over a year and there just isn't anything. There aren't that many companies locally that would have the sort of position I want anyway.
If your partner who you live with is unwilling even to talk about the fact that your new boss is forcing you to work at home, I think you have a problem that transcends an unreasonable new boss. I can understand him not being very thrilled about it but to refuse to discuss it when it's something you have little control over--well, that's neither fair nor good co-habitating. Tell him to wise up!
I had a good chat about this with my b/f yesterday. The problem is as I thought. He worked and lived with a previous b/f and that caused problems with them being together too much of the time - and he's worried that the same thing might happen again. We also don't have anywhere to set up a home-office so we would be in each others way if I was working at home. He goes to work mid afternoon and comes home mid evening, whereas I would be trying to work 9-5. I find it difficult working at home anyway, for the same reason - I don't feel I am "at work". It would be alright if we could set up a separate area just for work but that's not possible. We both agree that working at home as a regular arrangement is not going to work for either of us.
I don't know what your job entails, but it sounds awfully computer oriented.. Perhaps you could find a place outside the home with free wifi access to work from on the days you can't get into the office? Then, when that gets tiring, spend a day or two at home working. I would think going back to your old employer after leaving would be a pretty bad idea.. Because, if you left once, why wouldn't you again if something good came along? I think it might be workable, if your current boss doesn't leave often.. Good luck!
Yes, all I need is an Internet connection - and even that's not essential as it's only for email (mobile phone GPRS connection would do). The work itself would be writing software and designing circuit boards, which is done with the info on the laptop itself. Access to a printer would be handy but again not essential. I am going to have a chat with a couple of friends during the week and see if there are any options or ideas there. From the response I received earlier today it seems that I would have to report to that section leader - so that is a major negative. There are other vacancies coming up next year though. So maybe I need to try to find a way to make things work for now and see what is available next year?
If anyone is interested, I have now managed to arrange an alternative place to work when I can't work at the office. Once it is refurbished in a couple of months, I will be able to work in the office of a local shop that I already do some website work for. They won't be charging me anything because I get on well with the shop owner, though I will probably be doing a bit of PC/network maintenance for them in return. I'm happy, my boss is happy and even more importantly my b/f is happy!
Hey that's really great! Too bad your boss is still a weirdo, though, for not letting your work in his separate "home office" in the first place.
Well his home-office is not completely separate, as we still use the kitchen and toilet in the main house, and the way the place is laid out (it's a converted old cider mill) it would be difficult to concieve a way of separating it further. I can see his position though, as it would be like us letting someone work on our house every day while we are away on holiday or whatever...
