What do you look for, in a guy? - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered people coming out

warrior · 25th Feb 2010, 08:59 AM

What type of guy do you like? What attracts you to them? Comment on aspects of both personality and appearance.

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Personality: Very warm, caring, understanding, but at the same time VERY masculine and aggressive. Feminine guys (talking about personality, not looks) don't attract me much (possibly because I myself am quite feminine).

Appearance: The face comes before the rest of the body. I like a deeply masculine faces, with a slight facial hair, piercing eyes, full and adorable lips. Then I'd prefer good pecks, and then the rest, lol.

What about you?

matty123 · 25th Feb 2010, 09:16 AM

A good personality, they should be honest and nice and have a good sense of humor. They should be happy to just get to know each other first, take things slow, and they should be ok with me being occasionally overly generous XD they should have things in common with me, and they should understand that i need space, i don't like the idea of being with someone that's too clingy and needy. And they have to like my friends and my family, and preferably be an animal lover. When it comes to looks i'm not that picky, i like nice eyes, and hair and a cute smile, and an ok body maybe?and some fashion sense and general hygiene lol. So yeh maybe i'm a bit picky but i think my boyfriend ticks all the boxes ><

**Lexington** · 25th Feb 2010, 09:25 AM

...

...

...trying not to make the easy joke...

...

...

Lex

Sylver · 25th Feb 2010, 09:28 AM

Hmmm... gotta think about this one...

Personality - Honest, high personal integrity, somewhat intellectual (you'd have to be to live with me

), a homebody who'd rather curl up in front of the fireplace than go clubbing, quiet and shy, masculine or slightly effeminate, very loving, sexually open to trying things. Someone with at least a couple of cute quirks that makes them special! Oh, and someone who likes to alternate between stints in the bedroom and nature hikes

. But I wouldn't be overly specific because I can get along with most people.

Appearance - Hmm... I'm not too fussy because compatibility means more than looks to me. I'd say "healthy looking" so not morbidly obese but not a twig, someone who looks like they take care of themselves and who knows how to work with what they've got.

My one qualification - they have to be an excellent kisser, or there's no point in applying for the job! (seriously, I don't understand those gay guys who'll do you in a heartbeat but they "don't kiss" - what's up with that?)

Steve · 25th Feb 2010, 09:44 AM

has to be as similiar as he can to me. but diffrent at bed :P

Johnnieguy · 25th Feb 2010, 09:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JamesENL

My one qualification - they have to be an excellent kisser, or there's no point in applying for the job! (seriously, I don't understand those gay guys who'll do you in a heartbeat but they "don't kiss" - what's up with that?)

Seriously!! Yeah, sex is fun, but sex without kissing is like an ice cream sundae without the hot fudge, nuts, whipped cream, cherries, and sprinkles...In other words, plain old vanilla. (Pardon me for all the ways that my analogy can be twisted into innuendos.)

Zumbro · 25th Feb 2010, 10:18 AM

Personality is important. I want to date a guy, not a guy who acts like a girl (although, I did meet a rather feminine guy I liked at the club once. he was funny). He has to be sociable enough to go on his own, since I've grown up rather independent. It kills me when someone gets real clingy, especially if they do it real fast. (Sometimes I just want to hang out with my friends for a bit, without you, ok?). Honesty is real important too, but I hold honesty above most things in any relations, and I'm an engineer, so if you love science then that's even better!!

As far as physically, ideally i want someone a bit smaller than me (which isn't hard. I'm 6'1 and not exactly fit), mainly because people bigger than me freak me out a bit. I'm already huge

Too small and they're like a child in my arms though. Athletic/smaller builds are nice, but I don't judge. I'm not fit myself. I really do love sideburns though, and a nice smile is always great (look up Joe Mauer). Personal hygiene is important too, of course. Really, everybody can look hot or cute somehow, they just have to know how :P Not a fan of the emo hair-swoops though. Sorry Matty! :P

Black Cat · 25th Feb 2010, 10:32 AM

Personality: He's got to be a nice guy. I like someone who'll be willing to do anything once, and laugh about it later if he fails. If he's funny it'd be a major plus. I like guys who are dedicated to something, so he has to have goals. I don't want someone who agrees with me on everything - the idea of that just freaks me out. I like a man I can trust, and who trusts me. Family oriented - or at least can stand my family.

And a major must have for me is willingness to show affection both publicly and when we're alone. Nothing too crazy, just hugging or hand-holding would work. Oh, how could I forget: I also loooooove a guy who can fix something. I'm mechanically challenged, so if he can fix something for me it's a major point in his favor. Other than that I don't care really. If he's himself and happy with it than that's good enough for me.

Physically: A pulse?

I don't look for anything in particular in that area. I guess I'd like him to be similar in height to me. (I'm 6'2") Oh and he has to practice bathing frequently, other than that I'm open to anything. Nice eyes are a plus, and a gorgeous smile would melt my heart.

Emberstone · 25th Feb 2010, 10:32 AM

someone who loves me unconditionally.

crystaltriforce · 25th Feb 2010, 10:37 AM

someone who's smart, funny, can put up with any crap i might give, and someone who really does care about me

ArcaneVerse · 25th Feb 2010, 11:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lexington

...

...

...trying not to make the easy joke...

...

...

Lex

What do you look for, in a guy? Me...

Zach1992 · 25th Feb 2010, 11:16 AM

Honest, funny, sensitive, a cuddler, offbeat quirkiness, & cute in my eyes (I don't have a set standard for looks, a lot of different guys really attract me.)

Connor22 · 25th Feb 2010, 11:50 AM

cute face, fit but not overly so, funny and not afraid of doing stupid stuff that's about it but I'll settle for the first two

Just Adam · 25th Feb 2010, 11:53 AM

i look for love. its rarer than a mew.

**Owen** · 25th Feb 2010, 12:55 PM

Personality:
-A geek/nerd-type will easily win me over. Even if he isn't nerdy about the kinds of things I'm nerdy about (math and video games), if he can explain his obsessions to me and let me/help me share in them, he'll have my heart.

-That said, if he likes video games, it will be a big plus, especially if we can play together. If he likes math, then my pants may as well already be off.

-Being intelligent myself, intelligence is also something I like in a mate, but not nearly as much as someone who can simply carry on a real conversation. It doesn't even need to be a conversation about intelligent topics; it just needs to be a real conversation. One where we talk with each other, rather than taking turns talking at each other; where we share ideas and debate; and where we discuss topics of mutual interest.

-Someone who is really philosophical can also win me over, even if we disagree in our philosophical beliefs, as long as he is open to philosophical discussion. Being philosophical myself, dating someone who is just as philosophical would be a dream-come-true.

-A sense of humor is good, but his type of humor is just as important. Dry, witty humor will win me over in a heartbeat, but sarcastic humor won't. I'll be the first to admit that I use occasionally sarcasm for humorous effect, but I myself have difficulty figuring out whether someone is being sarcastic or not (what with the Asperger's and all), so too much sarcastic humor can be a turn off.

-As for self-confidence, there are two types I like: someone who is a bit awkward, like myself, but still confident; and someone who is self-confident in such a way that they actually make me more self-confident just by being around them. In other words, they build me up rather than putting me down. I've known a few straight guys like this, and I loved hanging out with them.

That may seem like a lot of criteria, but of a guy fits just one or two of them, I'd date him without a second thought.

Appearance:
Resident chubby chaser here. I without a doubt prefer a guy with a few (well, more than a few) extra pounds, especially centered around his midsection and/or face; I'm not a fan of moobs or large legs. Seeing a guy like that makes me feel the same way most of you feel when you see a more slender member of the sex your are attracted to. I can't explain it, so I just embrace it. I honestly will not be attracted to a guy unless he is overweight. I can still find him cute or handsome, but a skinny guy just won't turn me on.

Aside from weight, stubble also makes me like a guy. Not the five o'clock shadow kind, but anywhere between the "I haven't shaved in a few days" look and the "not quite a beard yet, but getting there" look works for me. It's not something that can make me find a guy attractive, but it makes him more attractive to me if he is also chubby.

I also have a thing for guys with long hair, regardless of their weight. As long as it is well kept, it'll turn my head. It can be straight or wavy, brown or blond, but as long as it is shoulder length or longer, its an instant way to steel my heart, and the longer the better. Long hair is more of a thing that I find cute than a thing that I find hot, but I find it so cute that it's worth mentioning.

haelmarie · 25th Feb 2010, 01:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lexington

...

...

...trying not to make the easy joke...

...

...

Lex

A big cock. You know you were thinking it.

I don't know what I'm looking for in a guy, I really don't. When I find him I'll let you know.

**Lexington** · 25th Feb 2010, 01:12 PM

^ Close.

"What do you like in a guy?"
"MY cock."

We now return you to your regularly scheduled thread.

lex

Lex

Shevanel · 25th Feb 2010, 01:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lexington

^ Close.

"What do you like in a guy?"
"MY cock."

We now return you to your regularly scheduled thread.

lex

Lex

Jimmy Two-times? xD

+ YouTube Video

25th Feb 2010, 02:29 PM

^Your making me wanna watch that movie again xD After Donnie Darko of course

rebz · 25th Feb 2010, 04:29 PM

Personality: I'd like a guy that's not fem, generally guyish and doesn't let being gay completely define his life. He should be comfortable in his own skin, but not full of himself and totally vain. I like a guy who can hold a conversation and appreciates romance. I like to take it slow.

Lifestyle: I find it really important to keep in good shape, exercise a few times a week, and eat healthy. If he does no physical activity or he always wants to get fast food it probably won't work out. He should be motivated, determined to excel in whatever work he loves.

Looks: I don't really have a specific look that I like; I think a lot of types of guys are attractive, but he should have some muscle and a low bmi. I don't like any races more than others, and I don't care about eye and hair. I don't like a lot of hair and nice skin is awesome.

25th Feb 2010, 08:59 AM	#1
warrior Well Known Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Posts: 104 Join Date: May 2009	What do you look for, in a guy? What type of guy do you like? What attracts you to them? Comment on aspects of both personality and appearance. ---------- Personality: Very warm, caring, understanding, but at the same time VERY masculine and aggressive. Feminine guys (talking about personality, not looks) don't attract me much (possibly because I myself am quite feminine). Appearance: The face comes before the rest of the body. I like a deeply masculine faces, with a slight facial hair, piercing eyes, full and adorable lips. Then I'd prefer good pecks, and then the rest, lol. What about you?

25th Feb 2010, 09:16 AM	#2
matty123 Well Known Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: A few people Location: Lichfield, UK Age: 20 Posts: 187 Join Date: Apr 2009	Re: What do you look for, in a guy? A good personality, they should be honest and nice and have a good sense of humor. They should be happy to just get to know each other first, take things slow, and they should be ok with me being occasionally overly generous XD they should have things in common with me, and they should understand that i need space, i don't like the idea of being with someone that's too clingy and needy. And they have to like my friends and my family, and preferably be an animal lover. When it comes to looks i'm not that picky, i like nice eyes, and hair and a cute smile, and an ok body maybe?and some fashion sense and general hygiene lol. So yeh maybe i'm a bit picky but i think my boyfriend ticks all the boxes ><

25th Feb 2010, 09:25 AM	#3
Lexington The gay gargoyle EC Advisor Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Colorado Age: 42 Posts: 12,371 Join Date: Dec 2007	Re: What do you look for, in a guy? ... ... ...trying not to make the easy joke... ... ... Lex

25th Feb 2010, 09:28 AM	#4
Sylver Happily Married To Zume Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: quite gay, thank you Out Status: pretty darn out.. Location: Kenora, Ontario Posts: 1,057 Join Date: Jan 2010	Re: What do you look for, in a guy? Hmmm... gotta think about this one... Personality - Honest, high personal integrity, somewhat intellectual (you'd have to be to live with me ), a homebody who'd rather curl up in front of the fireplace than go clubbing, quiet and shy, masculine or slightly effeminate, very loving, sexually open to trying things. Someone with at least a couple of cute quirks that makes them special! Oh, and someone who likes to alternate between stints in the bedroom and nature hikes . But I wouldn't be overly specific because I can get along with most people. Appearance - Hmm... I'm not too fussy because compatibility means more than looks to me. I'd say "healthy looking" so not morbidly obese but not a twig, someone who looks like they take care of themselves and who knows how to work with what they've got. My one qualification - they have to be an excellent kisser, or there's no point in applying for the job! (seriously, I don't understand those gay guys who'll do you in a heartbeat but they "don't kiss" - what's up with that?) __________________ "A gay man's life begins the day he comes out" James ~ Gay by Nature

25th Feb 2010, 09:44 AM	#5
Steve EC's Soldier! Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Sargeant sexual Out Status: whoever asks Location: Born in australia, but now living some where else Age: 21 Posts: 2,273 Join Date: May 2008	Re: What do you look for, in a guy? has to be as similiar as he can to me. but diffrent at bed :P __________________ Soldier " there is no room for that in my pocklet" commander " if there is room in your heart then there in your pocket" Soldier " i cant fit my gf in there" -r " have you tried ? until you try you dont know"

25th Feb 2010, 10:18 AM	#7
Zumbro EC Addict Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: 5/6 on the Kinsey scale. Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Troy, NY Age: 22 Posts: 434 Join Date: Jan 2010	Re: What do you look for, in a guy? Personality is important. I want to date a guy, not a guy who acts like a girl (although, I did meet a rather feminine guy I liked at the club once. he was funny). He has to be sociable enough to go on his own, since I've grown up rather independent. It kills me when someone gets real clingy, especially if they do it real fast. (Sometimes I just want to hang out with my friends for a bit, without you, ok?). Honesty is real important too, but I hold honesty above most things in any relations, and I'm an engineer, so if you love science then that's even better!! As far as physically, ideally i want someone a bit smaller than me (which isn't hard. I'm 6'1 and not exactly fit), mainly because people bigger than me freak me out a bit. I'm already huge Too small and they're like a child in my arms though. Athletic/smaller builds are nice, but I don't judge. I'm not fit myself. I really do love sideburns though, and a nice smile is always great (look up Joe Mauer). Personal hygiene is important too, of course. Really, everybody can look hot or cute somehow, they just have to know how :P Not a fan of the emo hair-swoops though. Sorry Matty! :P __________________ If you want to love the world again, you can't just sit back and wait for it. You have to go chase it, and it will be entirely worth it when you catch up.

25th Feb 2010, 10:32 AM	#8
Black Cat As Seen On Hoarders... Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: This cat is out of the bag - I mean closet Location: Pennsylvania, with the cows Age: 21 Posts: 2,391 Join Date: Jun 2009	Re: What do you look for, in a guy? Personality: He's got to be a nice guy. I like someone who'll be willing to do anything once, and laugh about it later if he fails. If he's funny it'd be a major plus. I like guys who are dedicated to something, so he has to have goals. I don't want someone who agrees with me on everything - the idea of that just freaks me out. I like a man I can trust, and who trusts me. Family oriented - or at least can stand my family. And a major must have for me is willingness to show affection both publicly and when we're alone. Nothing too crazy, just hugging or hand-holding would work. Oh, how could I forget: I also loooooove a guy who can fix something. I'm mechanically challenged, so if he can fix something for me it's a major point in his favor. Other than that I don't care really. If he's himself and happy with it than that's good enough for me. Physically: A pulse? I don't look for anything in particular in that area. I guess I'd like him to be similar in height to me. (I'm 6'2") Oh and he has to practice bathing frequently, other than that I'm open to anything. Nice eyes are a plus, and a gorgeous smile would melt my heart. __________________ "Your life is an occasion. Rise to it." - Mr. Magorium

25th Feb 2010, 10:32 AM	#9
Emberstone Flappychap Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Oregon, USA Age: 28 Posts: 5,591 Join Date: May 2008	Re: What do you look for, in a guy? someone who loves me unconditionally.

25th Feb 2010, 10:37 AM	#10
crystaltriforce raised by nintendo and sega Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: all but extended family Location: outside of Philadelphia Age: 21 Posts: 1,825 Join Date: Dec 2008	Re: What do you look for, in a guy? someone who's smart, funny, can put up with any crap i might give, and someone who really does care about me __________________ we need masculinity....PUT ON THE "FUZZY FUZZY CUTE CUTE" SONG!!!

25th Feb 2010, 11:16 AM	#12
Zach1992 EC Addict Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Guys Out Status: Out to friends, some family, & those who ask! Location: New York (State, not city) Age: 21 Posts: 1,171 Join Date: Jan 2010	Re: What do you look for, in a guy? Honest, funny, sensitive, a cuddler, offbeat quirkiness, & cute in my eyes (I don't have a set standard for looks, a lot of different guys really attract me.) __________________ "Sex shouldn't be COMFY!!!"- Lola (Kinky Boots)

25th Feb 2010, 11:50 AM	#13
Connor22 Stopped being (as) vague Full Member Gender: yes Orientation: up the bender Out Status: burned Narnia :D Location: Norn Iron Age: 17 Posts: 1,547 Join Date: Nov 2009	Re: What do you look for, in a guy? cute face, fit but not overly so, funny and not afraid of doing stupid stuff that's about it but I'll settle for the first two __________________ Kindness is a gift. Share it.

25th Feb 2010, 11:53 AM	#14
Just Adam Just passing through Full Member Gender: Something Orientation: Dunno Out Status: If they ask i will tell them Location: Wherever Age: 23 Posts: 6,002 Join Date: Mar 2009	Re: What do you look for, in a guy? i look for love. its rarer than a mew. __________________ There Used To Be A Point Of Things.

25th Feb 2010, 12:55 PM	#15
Owen Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult EC Admin Gender: Agendered dude Orientation: Panromantic androsexual Out Status: Everyone and their mother Location: Massachusetts, USA Age: 21 Posts: 2,871 Join Date: Jul 2007	Re: What do you look for, in a guy? Personality: -A geek/nerd-type will easily win me over. Even if he isn't nerdy about the kinds of things I'm nerdy about (math and video games), if he can explain his obsessions to me and let me/help me share in them, he'll have my heart. -That said, if he likes video games, it will be a big plus, especially if we can play together. If he likes math, then my pants may as well already be off. -Being intelligent myself, intelligence is also something I like in a mate, but not nearly as much as someone who can simply carry on a real conversation. It doesn't even need to be a conversation about intelligent topics; it just needs to be a real conversation. One where we talk with each other, rather than taking turns talking at each other; where we share ideas and debate; and where we discuss topics of mutual interest. -Someone who is really philosophical can also win me over, even if we disagree in our philosophical beliefs, as long as he is open to philosophical discussion. Being philosophical myself, dating someone who is just as philosophical would be a dream-come-true. -A sense of humor is good, but his type of humor is just as important. Dry, witty humor will win me over in a heartbeat, but sarcastic humor won't. I'll be the first to admit that I use occasionally sarcasm for humorous effect, but I myself have difficulty figuring out whether someone is being sarcastic or not (what with the Asperger's and all), so too much sarcastic humor can be a turn off. -As for self-confidence, there are two types I like: someone who is a bit awkward, like myself, but still confident; and someone who is self-confident in such a way that they actually make me more self-confident just by being around them. In other words, they build me up rather than putting me down. I've known a few straight guys like this, and I loved hanging out with them. That may seem like a lot of criteria, but of a guy fits just one or two of them, I'd date him without a second thought. Appearance: Resident chubby chaser here. I without a doubt prefer a guy with a few (well, more than a few) extra pounds, especially centered around his midsection and/or face; I'm not a fan of moobs or large legs. Seeing a guy like that makes me feel the same way most of you feel when you see a more slender member of the sex your are attracted to. I can't explain it, so I just embrace it. I honestly will not be attracted to a guy unless he is overweight. I can still find him cute or handsome, but a skinny guy just won't turn me on. Aside from weight, stubble also makes me like a guy. Not the five o'clock shadow kind, but anywhere between the "I haven't shaved in a few days" look and the "not quite a beard yet, but getting there" look works for me. It's not something that can make me find a guy attractive, but it makes him more attractive to me if he is also chubby. I also have a thing for guys with long hair, regardless of their weight. As long as it is well kept, it'll turn my head. It can be straight or wavy, brown or blond, but as long as it is shoulder length or longer, its an instant way to steel my heart, and the longer the better. Long hair is more of a thing that I find cute than a thing that I find hot, but I find it so cute that it's worth mentioning. __________________ "Stand firm for what you believe in, until and unless logic and experience prove you wrong. Remember, when the emperor looks naked, the emperor is naked. The truth and a lie are not sort of the same thing. And there is no aspect, no facet, no moment of life that can't be improved with pizza." -Daria Morgendorffer

25th Feb 2010, 01:12 PM	#17
Lexington The gay gargoyle EC Advisor Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Colorado Age: 42 Posts: 12,371 Join Date: Dec 2007	Re: What do you look for, in a guy? ^ Close. "What do you like in a guy?" "MY cock." We now return you to your regularly scheduled thread. lex Lex

25th Feb 2010, 02:29 PM	#19
RiotPoofBrandon Guest Posts: n/a	Re: What do you look for, in a guy? ^Your making me wanna watch that movie again xD After Donnie Darko of course

25th Feb 2010, 04:29 PM	#20
rebz Member Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Bisexual Out Status: Some people Location: Austin, TX Age: 20 Posts: 28 Join Date: Aug 2008	Re: What do you look for, in a guy? Personality: I'd like a guy that's not fem, generally guyish and doesn't let being gay completely define his life. He should be comfortable in his own skin, but not full of himself and totally vain. I like a guy who can hold a conversation and appreciates romance. I like to take it slow. Lifestyle: I find it really important to keep in good shape, exercise a few times a week, and eat healthy. If he does no physical activity or he always wants to get fast food it probably won't work out. He should be motivated, determined to excel in whatever work he loves. Looks: I don't really have a specific look that I like; I think a lot of types of guys are attractive, but he should have some muscle and a low bmi. I don't like any races more than others, and I don't care about eye and hair. I don't like a lot of hair and nice skin is awesome.