1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

You have to come out every day.

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by starfish, Mar 30, 2010.

  1. starfish

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Nov 11, 2008
    Messages:
    3,368
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Hippie Town, Alberta of the US
    Last year at work we had this diversity training we had to go to.

    They had a speaker talk about LGBT issues. One thing stick out in my mind. He said every morning when I get up, I have to come out again.

    I was reminded of that tonight.

    I have been chatting with an old college friend via email, that I have not talked to in a while. He volunteers with the boy scouts. Last year he had over 700 hours of volunteer time.

    I also have been volunteering with a gay mens AIDS prevention group. I started to mention it, then I remember he doesn't know I gay. Crud, I'm not really worried about his response, but I really don't have the energy for the conversation right now. So i just leave it out.

    I think we need to take out an ad during the super bowl. We can list everyone that is gay. That way we don't have to worry about who knows and who doesn't.
     
  2. RaeofLite

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2009
    Messages:
    1,344
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    BC, Canada
    Yea. Sometimes it bothers me too. But lately I've figured I just work it into the conversation as if it's normal-which to me it is. I get varied responses from "not even phased/conversation continues", to "oh really? You are?" to disgust. But really in every day life the more people find out that LGBT people exist, the better off we are. That's what I believe anyway. Raise awareness that we aren't scary aliens and the stereotypes and illusions that we're bad people will fade.
     
  3. pirateninja

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Sep 26, 2007
    Messages:
    579
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Bath, England
    Every time I visit my Grandma I have to come out again. She is losing her memory, not as bad as Alzheimers but still pretty badly. When she doesn't call me by my Mom's name she asks every time "Have you got a boyfriend yet?" Kind of an amalgamation of concern over my love life and consistently forgetting I'm gay, despite the fact I told her two years ago and repeated myself every time I see her.

    Still, her reaction is always surprised yet positive, so it's not too bad, just a little frustrating.
     
  4. Mogget

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2010
    Messages:
    2,397
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    New England
    It's odd and annoying. But I'm at a place where I kinda like coming out to people, so it kinda disappoints me when someone already knows cause one of my friends told 'em (most recently with this awesome--and adorable--lesbian I met).
     
  5. dude99

    dude99 Guest

    Anyway when she was your age a vast majority of gay people were in the closet. In addition family secrets then were just secrets. Of course families did strongly suppect someone in the family was gay but that issue was not really openly discussed. Her mind is in a different time period rather than the 21st century.
     
  6. Love etc

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 28, 2010
    Messages:
    29
    Likes Received:
    0
    Yea. And maybe in her day and age gay meant the happy gay? Not the homosexual gay?
     
  7. Just Adam

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 17, 2009
    Messages:
    4,435
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    My AV room
    i actually love the idea of an add reeling off all the lgbt people out there and its like WERE EVERYWHERE! ok that would prob just scare people lol
     
  8. lol. "hey, grandma, I'm gay." "congratulations!"

    sorry. Too early. Yeah, there are lots of people at school or dance that I think know and then they end up actually not knowing so that leads to awkward conversations... And some forget after I tell them. THAT's annoying.
     
  9. Owen

    In Loving Memory Full Member

    Joined:
    Jul 20, 2007
    Messages:
    613
    Likes Received:
    13
    Location:
    Massachusetts, USA
    I find that putting my sexuality in my Facebook profile and wearing rainbow jewelry does wonders for helping me come out to people every day. It's like my closet door is an automatic one. :slight_smile:
     
  10. Geradeth

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 13, 2010
    Messages:
    110
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Victoria, BC, Canada
    Hmmm, I know this isn't what you meant, but something about always finding yourself back in the closet having to come out again reminds me of those moments in cartoons when someone is trying to escape from a room and no matter which way they go they invariably end up back in the room... Or like the infinite staircase where you never get any higher no matter how far you climb...

    I'm sorry, I'll stop being depressing now...
     
  11. Johnnieguy

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2010
    Messages:
    355
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Twin Cities, MN
    Ah, a variation on the Red Queen Hypothesis :slight_smile: