yeah, im thinking about going to a party this week. I really need to get out more and this might be a way for me to meet people! im kinda nervous and i dont have anyone to go with, so that makes it a bit more difficult. :dry: i was wondering if anyone had any tips, ideas or general stories about a couple clubs/parties they've attended! OH, dancing tips! need despertly (techno music btw)!
Dancing: find someone who's dancing you like and shamelessly copy how they do it. Seriously--it's the best way to learn. I mean don't literally mirror them as they dance because that would be creepy but yeah, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. Tips: --If someone offers to get you a drink and you want to accept the offer, go with them while they get it and make sure nobody slips anything in it. Just general caution. --While cliched, "So do you come here often?" is a decent conversation starter. Maybe disguised as "Have you been here before?" As is, "So what do you do?" --If you have a sucky time, try going back with friends or giving it a few more tries. Don't let one bad experience sour you. --Decide beforehand what your boundaries are (in terms of how much you're gonna drink, how "far" you're gonna go with someone, etc.) and stick to those. If you meet someone hot and you're both really into each other, consider exchanging contact info and meeting in the light of day, sober, rather than going home with them to his or your place. Not so much for the safety concerns (although that is definitely something to consider) but more to make sure you don't get yourself into a situation you might regret. --That being said, do not be afraid to shamelessly make out with someone hot. :lol: --Push your boundaries a bit. (Sounds like you're already doing that, so kudos!) --Nothing attracts people as much as confidence (in terms of an attitude) so if you're relatively nervous, fake being laid back and, for want of a better term, relatively "chill." Just don't fake being a totally different person. Fake being the best you you can be. *grin* --Don't be afraid to start talking to strangers... just keep it casual and see if anything goes anywhere. --Number one important thing to remember: have fun! People naturally gravitate to people who are having fun--it can be quite uncanny.
I know someone who some people think is dancing like an idiot, but all the girls were just saying "Aww, he's so awesome! " So really, so long as you have fun, all should be well. The tips already given are good.
joeyconnick: Resident EC Sociologist and Party Animal! :eusa_danc greyundrstndng, I don't have much to add, other than I really hope you go and hope you have a great time. I didn't really understand myself when I was your age (i.e. my orientation) so I never really felt like I 'fit in' with my peers. So I didn't go to parties, and didn't meet a lot of people, and didn't have any meaningful relationships until my mid 20s. So get out there and go. You must at least know the person that invited you to the party, so you'll have that in common with the other people that are there. So another ice-breaker might be to ask people how they know the person hosting the party. That first statement is the most difficult to make. You'll be amazed at how relieved the 'other person' is that you've gone to the trouble of getting the ball rolling. Oh, and dancing? Just have fun! It doesn't need to be fancy or complicated. Just enjoy the music, and the people that you are with. If you look like you're having a good time, you're more likely to attract the attention of other people on the dance floor! (!) Good luck!
Joey pretty much summed it up, but in addition to the whole drink thing. Never leave a drink unattended and hold it by the top. This is generally more of a problem for girls, but guys have to worry about it, Oh yeah, and if your drinking, give your keys to a sober friend. Have Fun!!
Well if it's a backyard kegger (the kind of party I go to) just don't be like me and end up asleep in the front yard from being too drunk. Seriously, it's not good waking up to someone dragging you out of their car at your house. If it's at a club, then just make sure you watch them make the drinks. You don't want to get raped :icon_wink.
Its not rape if you're willing! :icon_wink lol. Thanks everyone for the great advice! :eusa_clap special thanks to joey! One last question here, i think. anyway to tell if a guy is straight or gay (or bi)? i have no "gaydar" and so far have fallen for straight guys :icon_sad: any ideas?
There's a thread in here somewhere on that topic... The suggestion that I made in that thread was to make eye contact with a guy. Straight guys at a party are going to look right through you or look away as though they've never seen you. Another gay guy is likely going to be looking back, and there may be a lingering look... If you look away, and then you guys make eye contact again - he's definitely checking you out! At that point, it's REALLY tough to start up a conversation, but remember that he's interested or he wouldn't have been checking you out! But don't spend the whole time staring at all the guys! As we said above - have a good time! The gay guys are going to be attracted to the guy out on the dance floor having a good time - they won't notice the guy off in a corner trying to make eye contact with them. Have a good time!
That's exactly what I was gonna say! You're totally welcome. Start going on and on about Zac Efron in Hairspray. Straight guys will find some way to escape you (while giving you really weird looks). Gay guys will probably start looking dreamy and drooling. Well at least I would. I just say it again tonight.
The "gaydar" thing can be hard, I wish it was instinctual, but sadly it isn't. The talking about Zac Efron and eye contact sound good, but also sometimes, it is so obvious, that it isn't even funny.
I agree with all the tips I've read here so far and would add two more 1-HAVE FUN 2 - DON'T drink and drive. Tell us how it goes.
Good luck and have fun. Also, as everyone else has said, stay safe. Let us know how it goes. I wish I had the guts to walk into a gay bar, I think if I had someone to go with it would help.
That's a great advice Yeah, you should watch them make the drinks for you. And if you gonna get drunk(not too drunk) I suggest you to not dance when you had few shots...just don't. Dancing tips?? Just enjoy!! No one is watching how you dance, they are not gonna judge you...ok, some might do but not all of them.
hahaha!!! im so excited! i just got back! omg!!!! i went and was very shy and standing alone for like 45 min. then i decided to join this group that i kept checking! there was a very hot guy sitting with these girls. anyway, it was awkward introducing myself, but i met everyone there (about 5 people). anyway, im so excited!, they were all supporters of gay pride! actually most everyone in the group was gay/bi! I finally found out there is a group on campus for gay pride! anyway, i met the guy there and he liked me! and i like him! we talked a bit and later went with him and his friend to the friends house were we watched a movie and made out. we then went for a walk and talked and got to know each other. i spent the night at the house, well actually the morning/afternoon till almost 3pm. Im so excited and nervous! sry if this is realy long, but im very happy and he's so gaylicious! lol, his word!
