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| Chit Chat General discussion of topics of interest to LGBT people of all ages. |
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| EC Addict Full Member ![]() Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Location: Toronto, Canada Age: 22 Posts: 668 Join Date: Nov 2006 | Hey all, I have another questionaire about online dating. I will be very thankful if people can participate! 1. Have you tried online dating before? 2. In your opinion, what are some of the disadvantages of online dating compared to meeting people face-to-face? 3. In your opinion, what are some of the advantages of online dating? 4. If you have not tried online dating, would you? If not, why? Thanks!
__________________ ![]() "But only in their dreams can man be truly free. 'Twas always thus, and always thus will be." - John Keating, Dead Poets Society |
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| One Is Light. One Is Dark. Full Member ![]() Gender: The Dude Orientation: Bi-Winning Out Status: Everybody and Your Mom. Location: Bolivar, Ohio (From NY though) Age: 21 Posts: 7,672 Join Date: Dec 2008 | I'm going to answer all 4 questions with a simple Mrah. That's all I gotta say about that. xD When I have the patience, I'll come back and answer these questions more in depth.
__________________ ![]() If there were no rewards to reap, No loving embrace to see me through this tedious path I've chosen here, I certainly would've walked away by now. Gonna wait it out... Be patient. |
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| | #3 |
| EC's Resident Parawhore Full Member ![]() Gender: I have an outie not an innie Orientation: Gay Out Status: I have a walk in closet that I walked out of Location: Red Deer, Alberta Age: 19 Posts: 890 Join Date: May 2010 | 1. I have 2. people can say anything over the internet 3. people act differently on the internet as opposed to face to face so you can get a better sense of who they are
__________________ There's a Vulture on my shoulder and he's tellin me to give in Always hissin right in my ear like its comin from my own head ![]() Its got me mixed up tryin not to give up tell me there's a way to get out of here |
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| | #4 |
| Not Upholding the Masquerade! Full Member ![]() Gender: Male Orientation: Gay. The slippery slide of outness. Out Status: Everybody and their dogs know I'm gay Location: Missouri Age: 20 Posts: 527 Join Date: Jun 2010 | 1. Have you tried online dating before? No. 2. In your opinion, what are some of the disadvantages of online dating compared to meeting people face-to-face? Ooooh, online contact! I've been talking to people online for years. People I have never met before, even my closest real-life friends. It is not the same as a face-to-face encounter. Body language goes out the window (this is key; look up some studies), no voice in many interfaces, no... no passion. It's just wrong. Besides, my ass is staying in Missouri. 3. In your opinion, what are some of the advantages of online dating? There is safety being separated by miles, routers, servers, and clients. The Internet is also overflowing in convenience. However, these points are heavily overshadowed by my points in the previous question. 4. If you have not tried online dating, would you? If not, why? No. I do have qualms about letting some rando in the Internet gain access to my personal info (to steal from the memetic side of the Internet, "dox"), and there are so many shady sites out there that my Adblock Plus filter list is brimming with these sites. Oh, did I mention Question 2?
__________________ X__________________________________ |
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| | #5 |
| Is mise Daibhidh Full Member ![]() Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Almost out to everyone Location: Scotland Age: 25 Posts: 434 Join Date: Sep 2007 | 1. Have you tried online dating before? Yes 2. In your opinion, what are some of the disadvantages of online dating compared to meeting people face-to-face? As others said you have to take most online dating with a pinch of salt, its not the same as making human contact, there's a lot of people there interested in only one thing... sometimes you think you're having a half decent conversation with someone and then they disappear on you and you're left thinking wtf? And the obvious one is the person you're speaking to may be nothing like you think, 1) you're building an image in your head which may be completely inaccurate, and 2) chances are they're not being completely honest. You also have to be very careful about what information you give out, and bare in mind what you type could very easily be misinterpreted. 3. In your opinion, what are some of the advantages of online dating? For incredibly shy people like me, its a chance to chat to people in a comfortable setting i.e. your own home, if you're doing it by messaging it gives you time to think about your responses. In many ways if you're lucky to meet someone who is honest about what they say, you can make a real connection, personality shines through messages, you can learn a lot more about someone, often moreso than in face-to-face encounters where so much else is going on to distract you from what the person is like at the core. 4. If you have not tried online dating, would you? If not, why? Well I have tried online dating, so I don't think this question applies for me. I will also say that being a closeted, incredibly shy guy, online dating was my only option to chat to other gay people. I met my partner on a dating site, and we are soon to be moving in together. Its not an easy thing though, it tooks us a number of months of chatting online before I felt comfortable organising to meet him... but I knew instantly there was something special about him, he stuck out from the rest of the people online. |
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| | #6 |
| Cecile's sidekick EC Advisor ![]() Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: All but extended family Location: Belgium, EU Age: 28 Posts: 3,366 Join Date: Feb 2009 | I doubt I'll be giving any revolutionary insights, but here goes (I phrased it for gay male online dating, but I think it goes for most other types, if you change the pronouns): 1. Have you tried online dating before? No 2. In your opinion, what are some of the disadvantages of online dating compared to meeting people face-to-face? - There's a much higher risk of people presenting themselves as different from who they really are, whether in how they look like, how they act, or what they want out of dating - If they are truthful, you're still mostly talking when both of you are reasonably alone, more or less relaxed, and interested in conversation. In a real-life date, you might be able to get a wider range of situations. - There is such a thing as physical attraction. To some it's more important than to others, but it's hard to gauge that during online talking. 3. In your opinion, what are some of the advantages of online dating? - You go in knowing the other person is at least interested in talking, and you don't have to do the whole "is he gay or not?" angsting phase. - Looking at profiles can already narrow down the choices. If you're interested in playing computer games, discussing books and politics, you can avoid the guy who only wants to be outside, do parasailing and deep-sea-diving. - You're alone and more or less relaxed behind the screen, and have some time to converse and become comfortable with each other before jumping to any conclusions. -Wider range: you might meet guys who you would never accidentally run into otherwise 4. If you have not tried online dating, would you? If not, why? I would consider it. Just not right now. But I do think there are potential benefits enough to consider risking it. And let's face it: even on real dates you could be fooled for quite some time too, so the possible drawbacks of doing online dating first entirely unique.
__________________ To the world, you're somebody, but to somebody, you're the world... |
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| | #7 |
| Empty Closets Advisor EC Advisor Gender: Female Orientation: somewhere over the rainbow Out Status: Out to most people Posts: 782 Join Date: Jan 2010 | 1. Have you tried online dating before? Yep, I met my wonderful girlfriend online. 2. In your opinion, what are some of the disadvantages of online dating compared to meeting people face-to-face? You may have to sift through a lot of creepazoids to find someone genuine, and, as others have mentioned, a lot can be lost in terms of body language, etc. 3. In your opinion, what are some of the advantages of online dating? Way bigger pool of potential dates. Also, I think it can sometimes be easier to get to know someone online first, because the nervousness of face-to-face isn't there. Totally depends on the person. |
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| | #8 |
| Ec's ADD Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gayish Out Status: My Twin Location: England, Manchester Posts: 3,080 Join Date: Oct 2008 | 1. Have you tried online dating before? Nope, but I want to 2. In your opinion, what are some of the disadvantages of online dating compared to meeting people face-to-face? A lot of people aren't what they say they are 3. In your opinion, what are some of the advantages of online dating? Wide variety, you get to know them before knowing them, if you get what I mean :P 4. If you have not tried online dating, would you? If not, why? Ofc!!! but.. I can't see myself doing it.. Besides, theres too much competition, I can't see anyone like.. get interested in me
__________________ Through pain, lies success. |
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| | #9 |
| The gay gargoyle EC Advisor Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Colorado Age: 42 Posts: 12,371 Join Date: Dec 2007 | Hard to answer any of these. I MET a guy online. But we were playing online video games, not looking for a boyfriend. We met, we chatted, we exchanged phone numbers, we talked a lot, and we started growing close. We finally decided to meet in the flesh soon afterwards. Was that "online dating"? Lex |
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| | #10 |
| the great cheese danish Full Member ![]() Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Buffalo, NY Age: 21 Posts: 2,874 Join Date: Jun 2008 | 1. I have. 2. Online dating makes things kind of impersonal. And people can lie so easily. Misrepresenting themselves and people over look facts on profiles. For example-I will have people contact me who are far above the age limit I feel comfortable with. I don't have issues with other people dating younger/older. But for me I have personal limits that I feel comfortable with. A 67 year old man sent me a message and I politely responded that I wasn't interested. He went off on a tirade about how I was immature. I pointed out that on my profile it said 'Interested in 18-25'. And asked him why he thought he was an exception? I don't want to date my grandfather. 3. If anything online dating gives you the advantage of a person being open about their sexuality. It's pretty straight forward in that department. Or "gay" forward. And communication can be easier to establish. So long as you read the whole profile the sites can be helpful. And they do match up interests and whatnot. So I for example-am never lined up with people who hate animals. Seeing as I own several varieties and love all my pets, I couldn't date a non-animal person.
__________________ "Nobody can teach me who I am, who can describe parts of me, but who I am and what I need, these are things I have to find out myself." - Chunua Achebe |
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| | #11 |
| EC Addict Regular Member ![]() Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out Online Location: Southeast of Atlanta, Georgia Age: 26 Posts: 343 Join Date: Oct 2007 | 1. I have, but not seriously. More as a way to keep my options open. I have chatted with a couple of nice guys though. 2. The biggest one is, you're not getting the complete picture of a person online. What you're getting is the person inside their head which may be a stark contrast to how they act in real life. I mean I'm a pretty self aware, bright, thoughtful, intellegent person, and it comes out online, but in real life, I get so nervous and flustered around people that I seem stupid, slow, and dull. Even if you think you know someone pretty well from talking to them online, there are always real life variables you can't account for. 3. For me, the biggest advantage is availability. I live in an area where it's almost impossible to meet other gay people. It's also nice to be able to filter out a few of the things that would normally be a deal breaker that you may not find out about until later on in a face to face. For instance I hate smoking. I grew up around people who did it and it has given me chronic breathing problems. Online I can just filter out anyone who smokes and work from there. So I guess for me it just really comes down to the convenience of it. |
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