How do you pass on people's Gaydar - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered people coming out

ardere · 22nd Oct 2010, 07:25 AM

I so happen to be a stealth bomber on almost everyones gaydar whether they are gay, bisexual or straight which sort of gets annoying and I have no idea how to change it. Every new person i meet assumes I'm straight even after they get to know me and when i tell them i'm not?

they end up not believing me

So how do you beep on peoples gaydar and how can you make yourself "visible"

22nd Oct 2010, 07:52 AM

a tattoo saying "I'm gay".

GoinStag · 22nd Oct 2010, 08:10 AM

I think people would be pretty shocked lol.

**lostinthought9** · 22nd Oct 2010, 08:53 AM

I'm not quite sure what you're asking...
Are you wanting advice on how to act gayer?

Don't worry about people who don't believe you're gay. Don't act a different way to prove anything to anyone. Just be yourself.

malachite · 22nd Oct 2010, 09:17 AM

I'm not even blip. Most people didn't believe me when I came out, and some still say that can't believe it. Probably why I was in that damn closet so long.

Usually people know i'm gay when a cute guy walks by and my jaw drops or I say something stupid like, "DAMN!"

GoinStag · 22nd Oct 2010, 09:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by malachite

I'm not even blip. Most people didn't believe me when I came out, and some still say that can't believe it. Probably why I was in that damn closet so long.

Usually people know i'm gay when a cute guy walks by and my jaw drops or I say something stupid like, "DAMN!"

Yeah that'll do it lol.

British Lad · 22nd Oct 2010, 10:22 AM

try wearing a pride wristband, you will defenatly show up than.

Leon481 · 22nd Oct 2010, 11:01 AM

I don't think I register one way or another. Anyone who knows me knows I don't have a life, so they don't really seem to wonder.

**Eric** · 22nd Oct 2010, 12:19 PM

People would really need to pay close attention to even have the thought that I might be gay. I just don't give off that vibe. And I don't act very strangely either unless I'm around close friends. Someone might eventually catch me checking a guy out, but apparently I'm doing it right, because no one's ever seemed to notice.

The best way to actually get people to think you're gay if you're barely a blip is probably to wear some sort of pride bracelet or something.

x2x2x2x2y2 · 22nd Oct 2010, 12:36 PM

All the people I came out to(except one) said they had no clue. I don't make a beep on gaydars apparently.

**Owen** · 22nd Oct 2010, 12:56 PM

As someone else who isn't in the spectrum the gaydar can pick up on, I'm going to give another plug for rainbow paraphernalia; it certainly helps me be more visible on people's gaydars. I have a rainbow ribbon pinned on my book bag and I wear a rainbow hemp necklace from time to time. Those two things together let people know that all is not as it seems with me.

AlyssWonderland · 22nd Oct 2010, 01:37 PM

Pretty much everyone assumes for me. Its weird, because how exactly does one act like a bisexual? There's all the stereotypes that gay men are flamboyant and lesbians are manly, but people just assume that bisexuals are sluts from what I've seen. I'm far from a slut... I don't understand people but whatever

xCrazyInsanity · 22nd Oct 2010, 03:14 PM

people easily clock me.

I think my biggest give away is my speech

Cheria · 22nd Oct 2010, 03:43 PM

Girls say I do, not so sure with the guys.

MusicIsLife · 22nd Oct 2010, 05:27 PM

I have a wristband i sometimes wear, but it makes my wrist itchy, so i dont wear it often. But if im not wearing anything girls usually figure it out. I asked one of my straight friends once, and she said i'm "very comfortable with girls". hehe. Most guys dont believe me, or think i'm bi but don't know it or something :P

EDIT: I just realised how pervy that sounds xD

If im not wearing any rainbow pride jewelry.

K44N 06 · 24th Oct 2010, 05:57 AM

My gaydar is 96%accurate btu when it comes to people guessing if im bisexual.....its hard for some of them, my gay friends pick it up straight away.
all my straight friends didnt believe me when i told them.

Miss Bubbles · 24th Oct 2010, 06:52 AM

well i generally break them people can't get within twenty feet of me with them. lol but im just a social butterfly and am not affraid to be myself.

stad90 · 24th Oct 2010, 08:08 AM

I'm the exact same way -- most people assume I'm straight. The rainbow bracelet has helped a little bit, but otherwise, guys don't look my way.

A while back I thought I should try dressing the stereotypical "gay" fashion--ie V-necks, stylish hair, and speak with the "gay" tone of voice. I quickly found (a) it didn't work out for me at all, and (b) it's always better to just be the way you are.

**Lexington** · 24th Oct 2010, 08:28 AM

Get your eyes done. You apparently are in the 1% who don't have "gay eyes".

Lex

Miss Modular · 24th Oct 2010, 11:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leon481

I don't think I register one way or another. Anyone who knows me knows I don't have a life, so they don't really seem to wonder.

This. And you don't have to change your appearance or habit to make other people see that you're not straight, because even if you do, there might still be people who won't believe you, so you would have done all that work for nothing. In short, you can't make others think what you want them to.

22nd Oct 2010, 07:25 AM	#1
ardere Newbie Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Anything goes! Out Status: Obvious to those that bother Location: Melbourne, Australia Age: 20 Posts: 9 Join Date: Oct 2010	How do you pass on people's Gaydar I so happen to be a stealth bomber on almost everyones gaydar whether they are gay, bisexual or straight which sort of gets annoying and I have no idea how to change it. Every new person i meet assumes I'm straight even after they get to know me and when i tell them i'm not? they end up not believing me So how do you beep on peoples gaydar and how can you make yourself "visible"

22nd Oct 2010, 07:52 AM	#2
LostandFound Guest Posts: n/a	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar a tattoo saying "I'm gay".

22nd Oct 2010, 08:10 AM	#3
GoinStag I'm straight now............sikeeee Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Guy fetish Out Status: Parents, siblings, and therapist Location: Metro Detroit, Michigan Age: 18 Posts: 1,485 Join Date: May 2010	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar I think people would be pretty shocked lol. __________________ *I've been thinking 'bout this all day long, Never felt a feeling quite this strong...I can't believe how much it turns me on, Just to be your man...*

22nd Oct 2010, 08:53 AM	#4
lostinthought9 EC's Biggest Xena Fan EC Moderator Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: A few people Location: Louisiana Age: 21 Posts: 2,059 Join Date: Jan 2008	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar I'm not quite sure what you're asking... Are you wanting advice on how to act gayer? Don't worry about people who don't believe you're gay. Don't act a different way to prove anything to anyone. Just be yourself. __________________

22nd Oct 2010, 09:17 AM	#5
malachite EC's realist Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Orlando Posts: 6,480 Join Date: Apr 2009	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar I'm not even blip. Most people didn't believe me when I came out, and some still say that can't believe it. Probably why I was in that damn closet so long. Usually people know i'm gay when a cute guy walks by and my jaw drops or I say something stupid like, "DAMN!" __________________ It's the 21st century, your bigotry is outdated. Either upgrade or go away.

22nd Oct 2010, 10:22 AM	#7
British Lad EC Biggest Tarantino fan Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: As bent as a roundabout Out Status: What Closet Location: West Midlands Posts: 1,275 Join Date: Apr 2010	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar try wearing a pride wristband, you will defenatly show up than. __________________ Who ever sayed "Ignorance is bliss" was a moron.

22nd Oct 2010, 11:01 AM	#8
Leon481 EC Addict Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out Online Location: Southeast of Atlanta, Georgia Age: 26 Posts: 343 Join Date: Oct 2007	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar I don't think I register one way or another. Anyone who knows me knows I don't have a life, so they don't really seem to wonder.

22nd Oct 2010, 12:19 PM	#9
Eric EC Chat Room Mod EC Chat Mod Gender: Male Orientation: Gayyy Out Status: Open about it. Location: Ontario Age: 18 Posts: 1,374 Join Date: Jun 2010	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar People would really need to pay close attention to even have the thought that I might be gay. I just don't give off that vibe. And I don't act very strangely either unless I'm around close friends. Someone might eventually catch me checking a guy out, but apparently I'm doing it right, because no one's ever seemed to notice. The best way to actually get people to think you're gay if you're barely a blip is probably to wear some sort of pride bracelet or something.

22nd Oct 2010, 12:36 PM	#10
x2x2x2x2y2 PARAWHORE!!!!!! Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: ~I like guys~ Out Status: Everyone, pretty much. Location: Wonderland (and California, USA) Age: 18 Posts: 3,971 Join Date: Oct 2009	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar All the people I came out to(except one) said they had no clue. I don't make a beep on gaydars apparently. __________________ "THINGS ARE LOOKING UP, OH FINALLY!!" "I believe that there's hope buried beneath it all and...Hiding beneath it all and... GROWING beneath it all!!" -Paramore ...and the lesbians

22nd Oct 2010, 12:56 PM	#11
Owen Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult EC Admin Gender: Agendered dude Orientation: Panromantic androsexual Out Status: Everyone and their mother Location: Massachusetts, USA Age: 21 Posts: 2,872 Join Date: Jul 2007	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar As someone else who isn't in the spectrum the gaydar can pick up on, I'm going to give another plug for rainbow paraphernalia; it certainly helps me be more visible on people's gaydars. I have a rainbow ribbon pinned on my book bag and I wear a rainbow hemp necklace from time to time. Those two things together let people know that all is not as it seems with me. __________________ "Stand firm for what you believe in, until and unless logic and experience prove you wrong. Remember, when the emperor looks naked, the emperor is naked. The truth and a lie are not sort of the same thing. And there is no aspect, no facet, no moment of life that can't be improved with pizza." -Daria Morgendorffer

22nd Oct 2010, 01:37 PM	#12
AlyssWonderland ninja. Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Bisexual Out Status: Everyone but extended family. Location: New Hampshire Age: 17 Posts: 670 Join Date: Mar 2010	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar Pretty much everyone assumes for me. Its weird, because how exactly does one act like a bisexual? There's all the stereotypes that gay men are flamboyant and lesbians are manly, but people just assume that bisexuals are sluts from what I've seen. I'm far from a slut... I don't understand people but whatever __________________ welcome to the sound of pretty. odd.

22nd Oct 2010, 03:14 PM	#13
xCrazyInsanity Gay, no. Fabulous, totally. Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Pansexual Out Status: All BUT family Location: South-East Pennsylvania Age: 17 Posts: 750 Join Date: Dec 2009	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar people easily clock me. I think my biggest give away is my speech __________________ This is love, this is not treason.

22nd Oct 2010, 03:43 PM	#14
Cheria にひひっ♪ Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Almost everyone Location: Illinois Age: 20 Posts: 636 Join Date: Mar 2009	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar Girls say I do, not so sure with the guys. __________________

22nd Oct 2010, 05:27 PM	#15
MusicIsLife EC Addict Full Member Gender: Not even sure anymore. Something in between. Orientation: I like girls :) Out Status: Everyone on orientation 7 people on trans issue. Location: Montréal, QC Age: 23 Posts: 1,595 Join Date: Dec 2007	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar I have a wristband i sometimes wear, but it makes my wrist itchy, so i dont wear it often. But if im not wearing anything girls usually figure it out. I asked one of my straight friends once, and she said i'm "very comfortable with girls". hehe. Most guys dont believe me, or think i'm bi but don't know it or something :P EDIT: I just realised how pervy that sounds xD If im not wearing any rainbow pride jewelry.

24th Oct 2010, 05:57 AM	#16
K44N 06 Member Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Bisexual Out Status: Some people Location: Sydney, Australia Age: 19 Posts: 22 Join Date: Oct 2010	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar My gaydar is 96%accurate btu when it comes to people guessing if im bisexual.....its hard for some of them, my gay friends pick it up straight away. all my straight friends didnt believe me when i told them. __________________ God’s in his heaven all is right with the world. 何ですあか？あんたばか！

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24th Oct 2010, 06:52 AM	#17
Miss Bubbles EC Addict Full Member Gender: confused on some levels Orientation: of the homosexual persuation. Out Status: So out im in Location: Indiana Age: 19 Posts: 1,037 Join Date: Nov 2009	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar well i generally break them people can't get within twenty feet of me with them. lol but im just a social butterfly and am not affraid to be myself. __________________ A Dialogue my besty made up in first period: Oh this reminds me of the time joan rivers made that fatal mistake: Oh apples how I hunger for youuuuu. "Joan Don't Touch those!" -bite- -hiss- 'Joan you and adam are cast out of heaven!!!!'-- Ashley D.

24th Oct 2010, 08:08 AM	#18
stad90 Your neighbourly nutball. Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: All but family Location: Los Angeles, CA Age: 20 Posts: 101 Join Date: Oct 2010	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar I'm the exact same way -- most people assume I'm straight. The rainbow bracelet has helped a little bit, but otherwise, guys don't look my way. A while back I thought I should try dressing the stereotypical "gay" fashion--ie V-necks, stylish hair, and speak with the "gay" tone of voice. I quickly found (a) it didn't work out for me at all, and (b) it's always better to just be the way you are.

24th Oct 2010, 08:28 AM	#19
Lexington The gay gargoyle EC Advisor Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Out to everyone Location: Colorado Age: 42 Posts: 12,371 Join Date: Dec 2007	Re: How do you pass on people's Gaydar Get your eyes done. You apparently are in the 1% who don't have "gay eyes". Lex