I feel like lesbians are more accepted then gays

[LumpyPrince]

At my school all the lesbians are super cool and everyone loves them and their like the cheerleaders and never get made fun of ever and guys always beg for them to make out with each other in front of them but gays are made fun of and no one really likes them. But that's just my school it could be different somewhere else.

[thedreamwatch]

If by "accepted" you mean, the ones that are cheerleaders and feed the weird straight guy's lesbian fantasy, then yes, we are "accepted".

But getting harassed about making out with girls by assholes doesn't feel very awesome. Or having guys literally ask to go home with me and whatever female I happen to be out with. It's just different.

I guess I'd say lesbians MIGHT in some places face less outright hate, but we are not always respected the way that people should be either.

And believe me, not all girls are happy to find out that there's a lesbian in their midst. Like they could somehow get infected with the gay or something...ugh.

Anyway, everyone's got it bad, it's just different.

[GhostDog]

^^ Yeah, I kinda doubt a pair of bulldyke lesbians would elicit the same kind of "acceptance" as their femme counterparts. Besides, "guys always beg for them to make out with each other in front of them" isn't the kind of acceptance we're after. It's like, great, I like women, so theoretically I get to escape men treating me as a sex object but LOL, NO.

Granted, that does mean hot femme lesbians probably don't face the threat of men beating them up. So, those kinds of girls do really luck out in that respect. A lot of violence against LGBT people is directed at MTFs (sweet Jesus they get a lot of shit), followed by FTMs and and gay men. Violence against gay women isn't so prevalent, though that's not to say it's nonexistent.

But I wouldn't take it to mean that men liking lesbians who serve as good fetish fuel reflects any kind of greater respect for gay women than they have for gay men.

[Daryn]

Yeah, I disagree with that lesbians are more accepted. Yes, a lot of guys think it's hot when a couple of feminine girls start making out, but I've noticed that a lot of straight guys really resent the more butch girls. Plus, a lot of lesbians face rejection from their female friends because, although lots of girls are comfortable around gay men, many aren't around gay girls. And you have no idea how many times I've heard boys at my school say that they could "turn any lesbian straight". It gets really old after a while.

[Holliepop]

and guys always beg for them to make out with each other in front of them

I wouldn't really call that acceptance.

Like others have stated, it sounds more like the fantasy of two girls making out, and yeah, the 'non-butch' type. Imagine if you're a girl, and just casually having a few drinks at a bar with your girlfriend, and a group of drunk guys come up to you and ask you to make out for them? I mean, you're not a show.

Guys also like to ask lesbians if they're willing to have a threesome. I don't understand how guys can even think that they would say yes; they're LESBIANS. >.< So, being treated like you're a live, interactive porn show doesn't really sound like acceptance.

But I can understand how someone may prefer that tto being beaten up and physically/mentally hurt.

[Lexington]

>>>I wouldn't really call that acceptance.

Ditto. Imagine the cheerleaders begging you to make out with another gay guy you don't have any interest in. That's not acceptance - that's annoyance.

Lex

[malachite]

guy (straight) all have a fantasy that two girls will let them join, so yeah more accepted.
Plus High School isn't really a place for acceptance because no one there knows who they really are yet.

[Vinny]

Not always, some girls don't like lesbians but have no problem with gays... not that I understand how that even works though :/

[Holliepop]

^ I had a friend like that. She told me it was because with gay guys, it won't ever be uncomfortable because they will never hit on her. Whereas with lesbians, they may do, which would make her feel awkward. But I don't see it (obvs cause I'm bi), but I'd just politely say "Sorry, I'm straight." Simples.

[The Dudeh]

All I can say on the matter is if a gay guy and a lesbian came out at my school, the gay guy would get so much more bullying.

[Vinny]

Originally Posted by The Dudeh

All I can say on the matter is if a gay guy and a lesbian came out at my school, the gay guy would get so much more bullying.

Same with my school.

[suninthesky]

At my school, I've never heard of anyone getting bullied because I think we have a very strict set of rules. I only know one gay guy (at least I'm pretty sure he is,) and he actually made prom court and he's a really nice kid so a lot of people like him. There's quite a few lesbians at my school, but they have a bad rep and people think they just do it for attention. Which honestly, it seems like they do. I don't know who would get more crap at my school though. It's sort of an avoided subject. (one of my friends didn't even know what the Don't Ask Don't Tell Repeal was. >.<)

[Cathulu]

I agree with the earlier posters. While it may not be physical bullying, or even considered bullying by some people, how is being pressured to perform sexual acts with your partner and some creepy pervert, or being propositioned to make out with some other girl just because you both happen to be lesbians, really considered being more accepted? It's demeaning, and unsettling, and puts you in a very uncomfortable position. It's kind of like dealing with sexual harassment that you only encounter just because you happen to be a lesbian. There's some girls who play up to it to get boys. They are not really the norm. Other times, it's unwanted pressure and attention.

It's true that males get most of the physical torment, but the verbal stuff comes in many forms. Homosexual females get degenerated to a sexual object and treated as such by the people who are supposedly "accepting." And yes, it's true that a lot of girls are okay with guys who like guys more than girls who like girls, primarily for the same reasons some guys are more okay with the flip-side. They feel less threatened.

Psychologically, though, it can be just as unsettling as being called names and teased. You're still nothing more than an object.

...of course, in the school I went to, it didn't matter. I'm from a very rural area, so anyone who displayed an inkling of being different was the target of cruel, and sometimes violent, bullying. This I know from personal experience, and that was even before I was out.

[IsItSo]

Lesbians aren't really accepted - they're objectified.

[kwyjibo]

Originally Posted by IsItSo

Lesbians aren't really accepted - they're objectified.

This

[Meropspusillus]

Originally Posted by The Dudeh

All I can say on the matter is if a gay guy and a lesbian came out at my school, the gay guy would get so much more bullying.

Bullying in high school is very different than acceptance in the rest of the world.

[rangerfan]

Now at my school for some reason its the opposite if a gay guy came out everybody is kind of fine with it, I really don't know why, but if a girl came out as a lesbian there would be so much backlash. One of my good friends just came out as lesbian, and for the past month girls at my school have been so mean to her, her once good friends have turned on her because they think she only got close to them because she liked them. Now all these girls rumors have started spreading rumors and she is so heartbroken over it. Also another reason its bad at my school is because there are about 7 girls who are transgendered FtM. They wear boys clothes, have their hair very short, and most of the girls are wearing binders. Let's just say my school is very screwed up.

[mnguy]

My quick take on this is that generally speaking, anti-gay people feel less threatened by lesbians and thus there is less anger directed toward them. One reason for my opinion is that when I read comments on gay-related news articles, more of the anti-gay comments mention gay men and or their sexual activities and how horrible they are and that's why they oppose equality. The opposition to equality focuses on sex between men and rarely mentions lesbians.

It's really sad that all GLBT people aren't accepted

[Aya McCabre]

Originally Posted by GhostDog

Granted, that does mean hot femme lesbians probably don't face the threat of men beating them up.

Less about being beaten up, more about being raped. I don't associate with many straight guys IRL but some of the comments I've had online would have had me calling the police if they'd said it in person. And it does get said in person. "Corrective rape" has happened to people I know. It doesn't tend to get reported as that since the people who do it always say she was asking for it, but it happens.

[Sheyceli]

For some reason I find that in general, there is less hate directed towards lesbians than gay men, but that doesn't really mean that they're accepted. With other guys, gays are really mistreated, mostly physically and also verbally. With other girls, lesbians are attacked verbally in a vicious manner. Gay men are mainly targeted in a physical way, because guys like to use their strength to beat the crap out of others, while lesbians go through a lot of mental and emotional issues because women tend to run their mouths too much and like to be manipulative and obnoxious, as seen in many 'chick flicks' about high school with stereotypical popular girls. They're equal in that aspect.

In general, anti-gay guys are more comfortable around lesbians for the 'fantasy' thing, as stated before. They feel disgusted and threatened around gay men because they're afraid they'll 'catch' something or for the fact that they don't want to be 'involved' with them. The same goes with girls. I do wonder though, why exactly is it that when homophobia comes up they always refer to the horror of gay men? They rarely mention lesbians. It's hard to say.