Is it wrong to have a preference?

[EndlessMusic]

I was having a chat the other day, and the topic of boy preference came up
where i would only date an asian guy, then it got into an argument about how i'm racist
won't give any other "race" a chance etc.
and then went on about how because i'm asian, that i'm being single minded
and being stereotypical (clinging onto one race)
so like, what do you think? am i really being single minded judgemental? etc.
it's nothing personal, it's just that i prefer just asian guys
sorry if i offend anyone by saying this...

[Filip]

Well, if you have a boyfriend, you'll probably prefer him over all other guys in the world!!! How's that for discrimination? 99,99999% of people in the world should be outraged at such rampant sexism, racism and many other -isms!

Meanwhile, seriously, I don't think you're single-minded here. You just like the people you like. Some people like blond hair over black, others like smaller people over larger, and just like that, some people just like different tones in skin or facial structure.
And you can't force yourself to fall in love with the occasional caucasian and black guy just for political correctness

Then again, I have so far only crushed on caucasian guys, so maybe I'm just horribly single-minded too

[Ben]

Is it sexist not to be attracted to women?
Is it ageist not to be attracted to people over 95?
Is it sizeist not to be attracted to people over/under a certain weight?
Is it speciesist to not be attracted to goldfish?

etc.

YES!

I mean… no

Attraction varies from person to person.

[Idonteven]

Originally Posted by Ben

Is it sexist not to be attracted to women?
Is it ageist not to be attracted to people over 95?
Is it sizeist not to be attracted to people over/under a certain weight?
Is it speciesist to not be attracted to goldfish?

etc.

YES!

I mean… no

Attraction varies from person to person.

exactly, what one person finds attractive, another may not. I don't see anything wrong in preference and wouldn't find offence in it. Every likes different things, each to their own I say If you would only date asians, you'd only date asians. That doesn't make you racist.

[Nazo]

It is not wrong to have a preference.
It is wrong if you only date within a certain race because you are legitimately racist towards all other races.

[Rikudo]

Nope everybody has their own preferences.

[malachite]

sounds like that person is over sensative and needs to get over themself.

No nothing is wrong with liking a certain race, you crave what you crave, you're not burning a cross on anyone's lawn.

[Totoro]

Everyone has preferences :P It's just a matter of how picky you are. But it's natural. And also, naturally you think your boyfriend is the greatest of them all xP

[silverhalo]

I think the difference lies in the fact that you are saying you are generally mainly attracted to other asian guys, just like someone that says I like my men tall, dark and handsome. Where the problem would come in is if you said I point blank wouldnt date a guy unless he was asian or I wouldnt date an English man because I dont like them.

[AtmaWeapon]

I don't think it's racist. Date who you want to date and don't date who you don't want to date. Sure, open-mindedness is very good, but preferences are fine, as well, especially when it's just a preference. It's the same as saying "I'm not really attracted to super skinny people, blonds, etc."

[Flyers2011]

It's not racist. I have my preferences, you have yours. As long as you're not rejecting people by saying, "You're black so you're not good enough to date me. You suck," you're not being racist. You like what you like.

No. You can have preferences for food so why not people? As long as you are not saying another race is inferior or superior then it's not racist.

[Raeil]

I'll add to the chorus of no's! What type of person you are attracted to and discriminatory behavior/thinking are totally different things!

I'll use me as an example (non-PC example approaching). I'm attracted to white guys. Why? I don't know, I just am. I don't treat my non-white friends any differently because of their skin tone, so... yeah, not racist. I suppose I'm also open to the idea that I could be attracted to a non-white guy, but only marginally more so than I'm open to the idea that I could be attracted to a women

(Although, I do ascribe to the belief of our friends on Avenue Q that "Everyone's a Little Bit Racist" sometimes)

[Markio]

Originally Posted by silverhalo

I think the difference lies in the fact that you are saying you are generally mainly attracted to other asian guys, just like someone that says I like my men tall, dark and handsome. Where the problem would come in is if you said I point blank wouldnt date a guy unless he was asian or I wouldnt date an English man because I dont like them.

I agree with the above statement. On a related note, here's a video with one perspective on the distinction between preference and prejudice:

+ YouTube Video

Also, I don't like when others assume that my "type" is a choice. This one girl thought it was so "nice" of me to be attracted to heavier men, whom are typically portrayed as unattractive. I'm not trying to do anyone a favor, it's just how I naturally feel!

[Revan]

Originally Posted by EndlessMusic

I was having a chat the other day, and the topic of boy preference came up
where i would only date an asian guy, then it got into an argument about how i'm racist
won't give any other "race" a chance etc.
and then went on about how because i'm asian, that i'm being single minded
and being stereotypical (clinging onto one race)
so like, what do you think? am i really being single minded judgemental? etc.
it's nothing personal, it's just that i prefer just asian guys
sorry if i offend anyone by saying this...

Just....wow....your friend.....ugh. Personally I think anyone who actually THINKS that someone not preferring a different race means you're racist kind of has no brains. I'm just saying, just because you don't get butterflies for a white guy as you would an Asian, doesn't mean you're racist, it just means you know what you like. I mean hmmm if you look around the world, while yes there are many interracial couples, why yes, the majority are couples together with the same or at least similar races. (By this I mean someone who is say white and they're with someone who's Hispanic. (Please don't take this as me being racist ))

[x2x2x2x2y2]

Honestly, most of the guys I like are white or mainly white. I've never been attracted to an asian person or a black person. I just don't find them attractive, and I can't change this.

I'm usually not attracted to mexican people either, yet I myself am mexican. >__< lol

So no, I don't think it's racist or anything.

[507bro]

lol i'm on the same boat, i'm attracted to Asian and i'm Asian myself.

[Enaithor]

I don't think it's racist per se, but say a really sexy black man comes along what do you do

Personally, I'm most attracted to whites and Orientals, but I really don't rule out others e.g. blacks and Asians, it's just that I don't find as many of them attractive

[Holliepop]

I feel awful when I say that I'm not really into black guys. It's usually white guys and girls, and black girls and latina girls. But I think it's because I've never met/seen an attractive black guy before, but if I do I'm not going to say "Yeah, he's black. Not interested." I'd be more "Oh awesome! " Haha.

Same with my friend, she doesn't really find white guys attractive, and she prefers black guys, doesn't make her racist towards her own race.

[Owen]

What it comes down to for me is that there are certain body types and facial features that I find more sexy that others, and they are much less common in certain races than others. Among my least preferred race, I have seen a few people who made me say, "Hot damn, hello!", and they were people with those facial features or body types.