Do you ever go through periods where you condemn yourself for being LGBT? I always do. I have a thing for rocker/emo guys and ALWAYS check them out and picture myself in bed with them. But I always call myself names and hate myself and feel disgusted.
Well seeing your orientation as unsure it's understandable. I think many of us when we begin to learn our sexuality go through a bit of stages hating yourself being one of them. Although not everybody does some people come to terms with themselves better than others. I was in the same boat as in I didn't like the idea of being gay. However nowadays I've come to terms with my sexuality.
Its something that I think everyone goes through when they first start coming out to themselves, but it does go away with time and the more comfortable you get with yourself. It takes time, but it definitely goes away the more you try. Some people take months and some people, like me, take years.
I hate myself for so many reasons, and I did even before I came out to myself. In all of my self-hatred though, I've never felt that I resented myself for being gay. But that's just me. Some people can't accept it right away, some can never accept it in fact. Fortunately I never experienced that problem firsthand. Like Gus said above: It goes away the more you try. Some people take longer than others to accept it. Just give yourself time. And try not to be so hard on yourself.
Well...when I first admitted it to myself I did I must confess...because I had to give up a lot of future possibilities from a professional standpoint. But there is a vast difference between admitting it to yourself and accepting it. How often I wished there was an instruction manual for this...I looked everywhere, but there was not one. It took me a while..a long while..and a lot of drugs and booze...to finally accept it. It is what it is, and I have finally come to terms with it...and I have no regrets It is important not to blame yourself in this circumstance...because the cards were already dealt when you came into the world, there was nothing you could do to change that. Come to accept it on your own terms (as we all have done) and you will be ok.
I did when I was younger, not any more. I'm proud of eing gay, of being different, I've come to terms with it and anyone else doesn't like well then they can go fuck off
