Why do gay guys talk in that funny voice?

That is indeed an interesting question, but it doesn't apply to all gay men. I know people who have been out of the closet for a long time and don't speak any differently than your regular straight men.

 

Because that's my natural voice.....? I've never seen anyone faking a voice to sound more gay or something/

Or maybe I'm not sure exactly which type of "funny voice" you're referring to

 

I can't answer that one, but I can tell you that I don't use 'the voice' when I talk to people. Thats one of the things that stops some people coming out in my opinion, admittedly it was one of the things that bothered me when I was more ignorant and before I came out. Gotta love the fear of being stereotyped. Some people are naturally like that though.

 

A lot of it is because gay males exist in a subculture, and a feature of subcultures is that they adopt distinct mannerisms and vocal patterns. People who exist in the gay male subculture will tend over time to adopt the traits of other men in that culture. A lot of this will dissipate considerably as gays are integrated more fully into society.

 

Wait, you think that's deliberate? I've always thought it were natural and intrinsic, but I don't really do it myself, so I don't know.

 

I don't. I'm a firm believer that the majority of us don't either. The one's who do are just the ones you notice. My guess is the one's who do are naturally like that. I haven't met anyone who does it on purpose. Sure they could imitate a normal voice in the same way that you or I could imitate a gay voice. In fact, there's not really any reason this high voice should be specifically attributed to gay people. I know straight people who talk like that. This is so arbitrary. It's a voice. Certain types of voices aren't handed out to certain types of people so we can tell them apart.

 

Some people just have very high and feminine voices. It's definitely not deliberate for many.

 

I'm not a fan of the high pitched stereotypical gay guy either (I felt threatened to admit I was gay, because I thought I would be unfairly compared to what some people expected), but there are several, if not a lot of gay guys who behave that way and it isn't to annoy people, it is usually their personality.

I don't talk like it though, my voice is pretty deep.

 

i dont exactly think its just their natural voice, come on do you ever hear a straight guy talk like that. i sort of agree with Liam, its something thats aquired from being around other gay men who talk similarly. i know personally that i spent a little too much time in boston last year and i talked with a mild boston accent for a while (pahk the cah in Hahvahd Yahd). thats the only explaination i can think of, it really doesnt bother me though

 

I have wondered this myself. Most of the gay men I've met talk like that, but I have also met men who insisted they were straight and talked like that as well. No one believed them to be straight, even when they insisted they loved women.

There is a study out there though on this. The findings are on the internet. I remember it saying that people can tell if a man is gay by listening to his voice, but that in some cases the "straightest" voice came from a gay man and a gay voice came from a straight guy. Also it says something about how people cannot tell a lesbian from a straight women by listening to her voice. It was really interesting actually. Maybe try to google it?

 

You're asking the wrong question.

What IF a straight guy talked even a little bit like that? What would happen?

His friends would laugh at him and call him "gay" until he stopped (which he would do almost instantly).

We have people on this forum, who, once they came out, have started acting like they actually WANT to act. They have changed the way they sit, talk, walk etc not because they are gay but because that is who they are. Before they came out they suppressed their true self.

The fact is, out gay men are more likely to be more comfortable with their sexuality than straight men. Thats why some gay guys act 'feminine' while straights generally dont. Gender roles are not set by 'nature' they are set by peoples perceptions of what male and female means.

 

You totally beat me to it. Nicely put

 

Well said.

 

Well, none of my gay friends, and I certain don't either, speak what that quirky gay voice. I do know some gay guys who do, however I don't think they do it on purpose - it's just their natural voice

 

I'm the only gay guy I know of that doesn't talk in the very stereotypical voice. Perhaps it's just because of my lack of exposure to a wider variety of gay guys, but it seems to me like a defense mechanism. It's like they're embracing the stereotypes before the stereotypes get thrown at them, if that makes sense.

 

Well, one of my best friends is straight, and he has a higher pitched voice than most guys, but does that make him gay? I didn't think so. I'm gay though, and i have a relatively deep voice for guys my age, so people don't generally associate me with being gay

 

Ira Glass and another reporter from NPR whose name I can't remember both talk in very high "gay voices". Considering Ira is a rather famous radio producer, I don't think it's a voice he "puts on". I felt like I should add that

 

I have a fairly "straight" voice - deep, measured, masculine. But I do have some "gay" mannerisms that slip in every once in awhile. Sometimes my voice takes on a bit of a "lilt". Sometimes it starts getting a bit more rushed and high-pitched. And sometimes when I laugh, the laugh ramps up into giggle territory. And nearly every time one of these things happens...

...I try to stop it.

Why? It's not because I don't want people to know I'm gay. I'm out. Everybody knows. When I filmed my "It Gets Better" video, I watched one of my scenes, and decided to refilm it...because I thought my voice sounded too gay. Think about how fucking stupid that is.

The reason I suppress this is because at some point in my life, I decided that these things were undesirable. That having a high-pitched, feminine voice wasn't as good as having a deep masculine voice. That even though it was OK to be gay, it wasn't OK to APPEAR gay. I'm assuming there were external as well as internal forces at play here - I probably saw how somebody with a high-pitched voice was treated, and decided to play it down. But the fact remains that, to this day, without meaning to, I keep my voice as straight as possible. Were I more relaxed about these things, I'm betting I'd sound a lot gayer.

...but I'm supposed to believe that it's the GAY-sounding ones that are "faking it"?

Lex