Porn?

[LowestVocal017]

I assume that such a topic is okay to discuss, for I found from the search that several similar topics has been discussed before. (Moderators are more than welcome to decide any appropriate action for this thread if deemed inappropriate after all).

I have always wondered these things of other gay people but don't know where to ask it.

1 - (For those who view it or have viewed it) At what age did you start looking at porn?

2 - Do you think that porn is healthy or unhealthy? Why?

2b - Why are so many teenagers guilty of viewing it but yet, at the same time, continue to look at it?

[chrisb]

I feel almost embarassed admitting it but i never saw gay porn till after i was 20 years old! I know it's unbelievable but it's true! I of course saw images of nude men, and had once recorded every nude scene featuring men on various movies that played on digital cable and that was during middle school....

[Mogget]

1. Nineteen. I was a late bloomer.

2. Neither. I think it can be used in healthy ways (to aid in sexual release) or unhealthy ways (as an obsession). Then there's the whole question of the moral implications, which I'm still puzzling over myself.

2b. I used to believe masturbation was a sin. I would try desperately to not masturbate, all while being terribly horny. Every few days I'd give in, and then feel terrible, but I'd still be horny, so I'd still do it. People look at porn and feel guilty about it for the same reasons.

[LowestVocal017]

Originally Posted by chrisb

I feel almost embarassed admitting it but i never saw gay porn till after i was 20 years old! I know it's unbelievable but it's true! I of course saw images of nude men, and had once recorded every nude scene featuring men on various movies that played on digital cable and that was during middle school....

Haha Can you explain why you would be embarassed of admitting that you haven't looked at it until 20? something wrong with not viewing it as a teen/pubescent? :P

Other than that, can you also please answer my number 2's? Thanks lol

[Flyers2011]

1. Never, at least not yet. It doesn't peak my interest. And I share a computer with my mom soooo yeah.

2. I'll say both. Some people view it out of curiosity and for a thrill. If they can keep it from controlling their life then it's fine. In fact, it's proven that masturbation has some health benefits.

However, if you become addicted to porn and/or masturbation it will have negative effects on your life like any other addiction.

2b. Teens are young, have a lot of hormones, and are curious. As long as it doesn't affect their lives and the porn isn't illegal (i.e. child porn) I don't see a problem.

[chrisb]

I have never felt guilty about masturbation nor have i about being gay, i feel like i have gone through different stages of life where the frequency is less or more, or none at all. Never been to obsessive even when i recorded the images it was not as often as some...

[LowestVocal017]

Originally Posted by Liam

I used to believe masturbation was a sin. I would try desperately to not masturbate, all while being terribly horny. Every few days I'd give in, and then feel terrible, but I'd still be horny, so I'd still do it. People look at porn and feel guilty about it for the same reasons.

Thanks. Liam! I like your answer especially.

I think it's interesting that you mention "sin." What exactly, though, cause these kids to think of it as a sin? (Is it because of the guilt instilled by parents? Does human biology help dictate this? etc.)

[Mogget]

Guilt instilled by parents, the church/synagogue/mosque/temple, or by society in general. We live in a fairly sex-negative society (though sexualization-positive) and it's easy to pick up anti-sex stigmas.

[crazyhead]

teenage years I guess.
there's really no black and white answer to if it's healthy. It's whether or not you let it become unhealthy I think. If it doesn't dictate your sex life, and you don't put off important things just to watch it (including sleep), you should be fine.
I would also say not to do it too much, but too much is kind of vague. I'd say to use your best judgement with how much is too much. But if you over think that, you'll overcompensate one way or another.

[LowestVocal017]

Originally Posted by Liam

Guilt instilled by parents, the church/synagogue/mosque/temple, or by society in general. We live in a fairly sex-negative society (though sexualization-positive) and it's easy to pick up anti-sex stigmas.

That's a very good point! (It's interesting to note that, so far, non of the (late) teenagers have replied in this thread so far, even though I'm sure many of them had started looking at an age as young as 15 or perhaps younger...)

[Zontar]

I didn't regularly look at "normal" porn until I was almost seventeen, but around fourteen I did dabble in reading fiction centered around a sort of fetish I've had all my life.

Is it harmful? I really don't know either way. I try to keep it as a context-sensitive nighttime activity ala drinking. It's definitely one of those things with addictive potential. I'll give you one thing though, nobody "needs" porn like it's a fucking vitamin.

I only felt guilty looking at porn because my parents had told me all my life that they didn't want me looking at porn on the Internet. Also, my socially-moderate parents didn't have a hand in this but rather my catholic school, would tell me that even masturbating to begin with was a sin, so I went an entire year in my teens trying not to masturbate. It took me a bit before I could discern what would be considered an age-appropriate introduction to it and dump the guilt once and for all.

[Owen]

1 - (For those who view it or have viewed it) At what age did you start looking at porn?

The first time I did any searching on the internet for images that would end up turning me on happened while I was in middle school, though I haven't the foggiest what grade or age it was. Being that it was middle school, that puts it somewhere around 11-14. I'm not sure when I actually started masturbating to them, though; I have some memories of just staring at certain pictures but not actually doing anything other than that, so I know I didn't start "utilizing" porn as soon as I found it.

2 - Do you think that porn is healthy or unhealthy? Why?

It all depends on how you use it. If it desensitizes you to the finer things in sexual experiences, that makes it unhealthy. If it causes you to view your sexual partners only as means to an end (that end being your orgasm), that makes it unhealthy. If it becomes an addiction, that makes it unhealthy. If you become so dependent on it that you can't masturbate and orgasm to your own fantasies, that makes it unhealthy.

As for being healthy? I don't know if I'd go that far. In the sense that it assists in the release of sexual energies, I'd say it's more healthy than not, but I think it's the release of those sexual energies that's the healthy activity, and the porn is only assisting it. That said, porn can open you up to fantasies that you never might have considered otherwise, expanding your knowledge of your sexuality. I know that it had the inverse effect on me: a few months ago, I was extremely fetishistic, unable to orgasm to any material or fantasy that didn't somehow feed into my fetish. Yet with the assistance of the wide world of erotic artwork on the internet, I was able to find pictures of attractive men that didn't feed into my fetish, and I found myself being able to orgasm to those pictures by imagining typical sexual activities with those guys. So either I taught myself how to being aroused by more typical sexual things thanks to porn, or that shift in my sexuality happened naturally and porn helped me discover it or flesh it out. In the end, I'd say that's a healthy effect, because it increases my chances of having a satisfying sex life, what with not needing to find someone who shares my fetish in order to make it happen (my fetish isn't the kind of thing you can do casually to please your partner; it takes dedication).

[addyction]

1 - i've been watching porn since i was like 11. lol. gay porn, too.

2 - i think porn's very healthy! it helps masturbation, which is healthy, too. besides, it's the only reason i knew what to do during sex my first time[:

2b - i've never felt guilty about looking at porn, so i can't really answer this question. . .

[Blakqsh33p]

I think I was about 15 or 16 when I first started watching porn. It all started with pretty much Hentai and then migrated to regular straight porn. I started watching lesbian porn I believe when I was around 19 or 20.

I think that some porn can be damaging like maybe beastiality for instance or maybe S&M but it depends on how sensitive you are to those things I guess. Two girls one cup pretty much scarred me for life lol. Um and I have never really felt guilty for watching porn, except for maybe if my dad found out or something. I think some people feel guilty for watching it because they were raised to believe that it's wrong and immoral when sometimes it's really not, I have learned a lot from watching porn, learned stuff I have tried in bed and was glad I learned it. And I guess they continue to watch it because well, it's hard not to! lol

[FJ Cruiser]

I regrettably started looking at it as young as 13. It's not for me to say weather it's healthy or unhealthy for someone else, but for me, I wish hadn't. Prudish as it may sound, it doesn't really jive with my beliefs, and I never had a good feeling after looking at it. That said, I didn't really feel guilty after I masturbated without it. Porn is all about lust, and I believe sex should be about love. It has the tendency to distort one's view of sex, and it confused me just as much as it helped me sort out my feelings.

For me, I kept on coming back to it because it filled a psychological need. It allowed me to compartmentalize my homosexuality. I was "straight" the rest of the time. It was my one sexual release, and it only served to help me bury my feelings until they were released in other unhealthy ways.

[Enaithor]

1. I was probably about 13-14
2. I think it's ok as long as the viewer is aware that it isn't particularly close to real life
2b. Genuinely no idea, I've never really felt guilty for watching porn...

[Mad Man L]

1. At around age 14, although from what I gather, I was one of the later people to start 'watching it'. And yes, I <3 straight, bi and gay porn :P

2. Healthy-ish. Helps keep one's hormones under control, yet if it turns into an addiction, it can be baaaaaad. Most teenagers need a 'sexual release' once every few days at the least in my opinion.

Morally? Both people in the act have given consent, so unless your one of those conservatives who believe 'sex is for reproduction only', there really shouldn't be concern imo.

2b. Because it's hot. I mean, it's the same reason why people keep masturbating. Because it feels awesome. Sometimes I just feel the need to see some women screwing. Sometimes I want to see some men screwing. You might feel a bit guilty afterwards, but the good feeling outweighs the bad feeling.

[Chip]

I see porn as a mixed bag.

On the one hand, Internet porn has done a lot to "pull back the curtain" about sexual practices and, on the whole, make it more OK for people to talk about sex, orgasms, masturbation, and the like. And I think that is a really good thing, because as several in this thread have said, a lot of our ideas about sex or masturbation as shameful, wrong, or sinful have their origin in religious beliefs and Victorian-era values that most would agree don't contribute to a healthy viewpoint. So by creating an environment where everyone can admit that they masturbate, and that it's not a bad thing, and everyone can have the opportunity (if they choose to) to talk about sex openly and without embarrassment, I think there's been a really positive benefit to the wide availability of porn on the internet.

On the flip side, porn can be really problematic. One issue is the message it sends. There's pretty much no question that the rise in barebacking (have anal sex without condoms) among gay men under 21 is correlated to (and probably caused by) the constant, unrelenting increase in the production of gay bareback porn, particularly in the twink sector. Prior to 2001, nearly 100% of gay porn produced was condom porn. Now, it's approaching 100% (particularly in twink porn) of new porn is bareback. I think that sends a terrible message to youth watching the porn, it puts the models who are shooting the porn at risk, and is just generally a bad idea.

I also have very mixed feelings about the people portrayed in porn. With few exceptions, the guys are muscular, well proportioned, with unusually large penises... and that contributes to severe self consciousness because the average guy does *not* have even a 6 inch dick; the average is more like 4.5 inches... but you'd never know that from watching porn. But if you think about it... the guys that have the big dicks are going to be the ones who want to show them off, while the guys with more average endowments are going to be less comfortable doing so. And that, in turn, perpetuates the idea that you have to have a perfect body, a big penis, or, if you're a female, perfect proportions and enormous breasts.

Another concern is how porn is affecting sexual performance among those who watch it. That perfect porn scene where everyone is into it and the models move seamlessly from one position to the next, always rock hard are completely unrealistic. (it also probably took 2 to 4 hours to film that 15 minute scene, but you'd never know it the way it's edited.) That creates unrealistic expectations among those just starting to have sex.

The last concern is addiction or habituation. Addiction to porn isn't actually very common; the number of people who get stuck in a place where they actually have clinical signs of addiction to porn is pretty small. But there are an awful lot of people, particularly people under 25, who simply can't masturbate without watching porn. And that's really unfortunate, because I think it prevents people from developing their own fantasies and healthy attitudes about sex that come from simply dreaming and imagining past sexual experiences or fantasy partners or what have you.

Sex and masturbation are things that are healthy, normal, and should be enjoyable, without any trace of guilt, shame, or embarrassment. People should be comfortable talking about it and participating in it, and to some extent, as I said above, widespread availability of porn has helped make that more common than it was 20 years ago, and as several have said, porn can be helpful in providing, uh, technical knowledge about what to do and so forth, and in helping one to identify his or her own sexual orientation. But it's a double edged sword, and can have some really negative effects too.

I think it's necessary, and even if we wanted to stamp it out, it would never happen. But I do wish that more porn producers would think about the negative aspects and at least take some steps to send positive messages and model healthy behaviors.

[malachite]

1. 12 I think
2. Health, nothing wrong with exploring yourself sexuality.
3. We're taught the sex is a private thing, so when its made public its embarrassing

[Hitchhiker]

1 - I tried once when I was like 14; I went to like 'porn.com' or something and I was terrified and disgusted and never went back LOL.

2 - Healthy in moderation.

2b - The one time I looked at it I was like ;_; what would their mothers think? type of thing. So I felt guilty about that.