any virgins in here that never been in a relationship or anything related to love??

[needshelp]

i'm in my mid 20s and i'm still a virgin. never been on a date, never been in a relationship, never kissed before. it annoys me like hell. it doesn't help that i'm confused about my sexuality too. there's something in me that says just throw in the towel, come out the closet, start going out on dates with guys, start living the love life i never had some i'm some years from hitting 30. honestly, i want to have sex with a woman first even though i haven't been lucky with getting women and the ones that are interested in me, i'm not attracted to.

[Mellowish]

Ugh that's practically me -___-
I'd rather wait to come out to everyone then date than just find some random person and give my virginity up to them so i can say i'm not a virgin anymore. I feel cheesy saying this but i want it to be special and with someone i truly love.haha

[kylegf2011]

Im 19, and the most Ive ever done is kiss a girl, and I doubt it counts cause I didnt even like it :S

[Raeil]

Hi, 19 year old here (turning 20 in a few months).

Dating history? Before puberty, I had two "girlfriends" which were really just good friends who I could see myself living with (because my attractions to guys hadn't been horribly apparent to me). After puberty, I "dated" one girl for 3 days in an attempt to keep my straight image up, and I asked another girl out in an attempt to prove to myself that I wasn't gay. Other than that, nada...

No sex, no feeling up, no kissing, no dates, no hand holding, no "I love you's," ... no nothing. And you know what? It's not too bad. I mean, sure, it's upsetting that I'm talking with my straight friends who have dated a few to several people, some of whom have gone across the sex line with their significant other, while I'm sitting here and have absolutely no relationship experience. However, life goes on, and I'm moving with it. I'm currently searching for a relationship, but I'm not lowering my standards based on my lack of experience at my age, and I have no intention to ever do that. If that means I don't have a relationship for another 19 years, then so be it. As long as I am open to relationships, the time it takes is irrelevant.

I understand that you're taking things a little differently, but I'd like to offer this advice. Don't worry too much about getting into a relationship before a time limit expires. Life has a multitude of experiences to offer, and while romantic/sexual relationships are one class of the major experiences, there are many other relationships and opportunities that are available to you. Sure, it kind of sucks if it takes a while, but if you actively and desperately search for a date/sex, it's tough to find a meaningful relationship. Search, but don't race the clock. Life holds many things, and you will find what you are looking for.

[Noah27]

well I just turned 20 and Iam a virgin...becuase like mellowish said I want it to be special too iam not just going to give it up to anyone cuz then I would feel all dirty. I dont know how most guys can just have one night stands and not fell guilty. Well just dont give up hope dude it will all be ok just dont close yourself up because thats how I was I was all like "I dont think I will ever find the right guy...maby Iam not gay" or "UHHHHHHH why cant I find a nice guy thats cute...is it cuz iam not cute" and with those lil things you close the door to alot of great things. Just give dont get worked up about it you dont have to label yourself if you dont want to who knows you might be bi.

[Brightsky]

I know how you feel, I just turned 21 today and I'm still a virgin. I've only had 1 girlfriend in the 11th grade. We made out a lot and when i went to put my hand down there it freaked me out and i quickly retracted my hand. Thats about as far as i've ever gone with a girl. I ended the relationship after a month because i didn't want it to go any further. I've never been with a guy but thats all i can think about now. Maybe one day, hopefully soon.

[Mad Man L]

Yep, that's me, but I'm just 16 and look like I'm only 14.

[Gay Boi]

I am twenty five and still in a virgin. I have been in relationships before but I haven't gone all the way. The guys I have dated were not guys I have wanted to lose my virginity to. You're not alone

[Artemicion]

22...23 soon...no date, no relationship, no kiss, ...yep...you're not alone

[Allegro molto]

~21 years old
~Never been kissed
~Never been on a date
~Never have been in a relationship, not even a small one

[Messed Up]

22...was this close (squeezes fingers together in a pinching motion) this summer to having my first relationship and he bailed on me. I think about him endlessly but I don’t know if I can/should forgive him...this was his second chance. I WANT to give him another...I want to kiss him, I want to hold him, I want to celebrate Christmas with him, massage him after a hard day’s work/schoolday, I want to shock my friends at my sister’s wedding by sitting him with them and telling them “Take care of my baby while I make my speech" and then kiss him on the lips and smile back at them, dance with him at the wedding, take him on a romantic stroll in the park, walk the Harbour with him, everything...sex is nothing but an afterthought... I want to hate him but I can’t, no matter how hard I try...

</3

[needshelp]

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ ^^

sounds so romantic. i'm jealous of him.

any of you guys in here that never had sex with a man or a woman, do you ever question yourselves?

[Raeil]

I can only answer for myself, but I do not. Ever since my hormones kicked in, I've been exclusively attracted to guys. I fought my attractions for 7 years, but nothing else ever clicked and I realized that I might hurt myself/girls-who-I-would-use-as-beards-without-telling-them-they-were-beards. However, I will say that if I ever become attracted to a woman, I'll pursue it if I feel it is necessary to do so. It's just that I've never had that attraction.

Just so you know, it's ok to not be "gay" and it's ok to not be "straight" and it's ok to not be "bi." Those are only labels that attempt to describe a hugely complex sexual identity. For me, the first label works pretty well, which is why I happily identify as gay. It's easy for people to understand "Oh, so he likes guys exclusively." If I had general attractions to women and many attractions to men, I don't know if I'd take on the "bi" label, because it tends to be seen as a 50-50 thing (even though it most certainly is NOT exclusively that). If you want to have sex with a woman, and it's because you are attracted to women more than in specific cases, then don't attempt to come out as "gay" because that label doesn't describe who you truly are. If you want to have sex with a woman, and it's because you're attempting to run from an exclusive attraction to males, then examine yourself and figure out whether it's worth it to attempt a relationship with people you aren't attracted to.

Bottom line: Even if you're confused, the question is not "Am I Gay, Bisexual, Straight, etc?" The question is "Who do I like and should I pursue it?" Don't get caught up in the labels, as they can't ever really tell the full story.

[Messed Up]

Originally Posted by needshelp

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ ^^

sounds so romantic. i'm jealous of him.

any of you guys in here that never had sex with a man or a woman, do you ever question yourselves?

Jealous? Why? LOL! He never got the chance. Bastard that he is. LOL

[needshelp]

Originally Posted by Raeil

I can only answer for myself, but I do not. Ever since my hormones kicked in, I've been exclusively attracted to guys. I fought my attractions for 7 years, but nothing else ever clicked and I realized that I might hurt myself/girls-who-I-would-use-as-beards-without-telling-them-they-were-beards. However, I will say that if I ever become attracted to a woman, I'll pursue it if I feel it is necessary to do so. It's just that I've never had that attraction.

Just so you know, it's ok to not be "gay" and it's ok to not be "straight" and it's ok to not be "bi." Those are only labels that attempt to describe a hugely complex sexual identity. For me, the first label works pretty well, which is why I happily identify as gay. It's easy for people to understand "Oh, so he likes guys exclusively." If I had general attractions to women and many attractions to men, I don't know if I'd take on the "bi" label, because it tends to be seen as a 50-50 thing (even though it most certainly is NOT exclusively that). If you want to have sex with a woman, and it's because you are attracted to women more than in specific cases, then don't attempt to come out as "gay" because that label doesn't describe who you truly are. If you want to have sex with a woman, and it's because you're attempting to run from an exclusive attraction to males, then examine yourself and figure out whether it's worth it to attempt a relationship with people you aren't attracted to.

Bottom line: Even if you're confused, the question is not "Am I Gay, Bisexual, Straight, etc?" The question is "Who do I like and should I pursue it?" Don't get caught up in the labels, as they can't ever really tell the full story.

that's my problem. i don't want to come out of the closet and say "yeah, i like guys" when i'm not entirely sure but then again, as i get older (i'm turning 25 in 11 days) i'm starting to realize that even if i do get with a woman that i think is attractive, has a matching personality or whatever, i don't think i can truly be happy with her with an ongoing attraction to guys. honestly, i think i'd feel more happier and satisified with a man more so than a woman. the fantasies i've had where i'm with a guy where we're cuddling, touching each other feels makes me much more excited than that with a woman. hell, if i hooked up with a woman that i really liked, i was contemplating of telling her that i'm attracted to guys and i don't know how to deal with it or i might be bisexual or something like that. i feel that this conflict with myself where i have an attraction to guys makes it kind of hard to even get with a woman. my fear of being in a relationship with a woman i think says something about me as a person. maybe i'm so much in denial of my sexuality that it gets to the point where i'm afraid that i can't geniunely show the same feelings of geniune love and affection for a woman that i probably would have no problem showing towards a man.

yeah but you know.. i don't want to do something that i'll regret in the long run but then again, i think getting with a woman that i really don't want to be with may be as big of a mistake as not getting with a guy i want to be with. you know? i actually wouldn't mind going to a gay bar sometime down the road, you know.

[Gay Boi]

^^^^

I also used to question myself when I was younger. I am attracted to men mostly but there have been girls that I have liked. Your post describes how I feel.

[PerfectInsanity]

Turning 25 next week and don't have any viable dating prospects yet. In my life I've only had three crushes, including a current one on a friend of mine. I'm pretty sure he is not 100% straight based on the way he acts around me, but he is in a relationship with a girl and is one of those people that are obviously pretending to be "macho" all the time (overcompetitive jock, kind of "redneck-ish"). I haven't come out to him yet, but he always acts weird (nervous/ackward) around me which is why I've suspected him of being at least bisexual. The problem is, after suspecting this about him and being generally attracted to him physically, I developed a crush on him and basically obsessed the whole summer about him (not knowing any other potentially gay guys, he was all I really had to think about). However, upon seeing him again once the new semester began and starting to go to our school's GLBT org.'s meetings, I think I'm starting to get over him (not wasting as much time thinking about him). I need to find someone else to think about... Dammit!

[Maddy]

21. Up until last year I hadn't kissed anyone that I felt counted. I've had semi-dating things, but no real relationship, and virginity is still intact.

[silverhalo]

Hey dont worry you are definately not alone.

I am not a virgin anymore but I was up until I was 26, I had never had a date or a kiss with a male or female or anything at all, I totally understand that its difficult to come out with the nagging doubt in the back of your mind, but I think you have to at least start the coming out process, even if you just say you like guys as well as girls or that you are interested, whatever you feel comfortable with, you dont have to tell everyone you meet but just a friend or 2 or family and then maybe do some online dating or go to a LGBT group or something and it will all fall into place.

I know you are now thinking that it wont fall into place, I never used to believe people either but it does.

[Just Passing]

This is pretty much me at age nineteen to be twenty in March next year. Oh well, still time.