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Rooni321 · 3rd Oct 2011, 10:55 PM

Does anyone else get kind of turned of when a girl (or guy) is super obvious that they want you that it comes of desperate-ish?

For example;
There's this girl at my school who keeps looking at me and smiling and stuff and I'm okay with that because she's really hot. But then every time she's near me she starts getting loud with her friends and starts booty jiggling and booby poppin everywhere and it seems like she's doing it for attention. But its slightly negative attention.
Idk I hate seeming so judgemental! Maybe that's just how she is but its really a turn off.
Ugggh
What do y'all think?

Lenny · 5th Oct 2011, 04:34 AM

Well you know that saying 'Love is blind'? Peeps tend to become a bit erratic when they are overwhelmed with a strong emotion...from her perspective she probably thinks she looks awesome! If you ever have a quiet moment with her just point it out...but in a funny relaxed sort of way..it will break any awkwardness and she'll be more aware of it in the future...

maverick · 5th Oct 2011, 04:39 AM

Desperation is a turn-off to me, yes. I like it when people are relaxed and self-confident, because a) I'm attracted to laid-back personalities, and b) being around calm people helps me to be calm.

Rooni321 · 5th Oct 2011, 09:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lenny

Well you know that saying 'Love is blind'? Peeps tend to become a bit erratic when they are overwhelmed with a strong emotion...from her perspective she probably thinks she looks awesome! If you ever have a quiet moment with her just point it out...but in a funny relaxed sort of way..it will break any awkwardness and she'll be more aware of it in the future...

That's true, I remember doing that when I was younger. But that's definately a good idea!

---------- Post added 5th Oct 2011 at 09:35 AM ----------

Quote:

Originally Posted by maverick

Desperation is a turn-off to me, yes. I like it when people are relaxed and self-confident, because a) I'm attracted to laid-back personalities, and b) being around calm people helps me to be calm.

Yeah me too, I usually tend to like the people that are more in the backround than people who are all over the place!

Sharkattack2222 · 5th Oct 2011, 09:41 AM

To me, it seems like people are attracted to the things they can't have, or the things they need to work for. There's something about "the chase" that keeps us excited and wanting more. When people throw themselves on me and act desperate, it really affects how I feel about them and it isn't very attractive. The only time it doesn't bother me, is if it's someone who I was already interested in before I found out they were interested. Although on the other hand, when "we" are the ones being chased, the person who is into us will want us even more if we don't act interested because "they want what they can't have". Does that make sense? It's a vicious cycle.

So yes , desperation is a turnoff for me . If I was attracted to the person beforehandthough it might change how I feel about it

Rooni321 · 5th Oct 2011, 10:07 AM

Actually that makes a lot of sense!
I went through a lot to chase this girl only to find out that she was straight and a bitch.
But I just wish there was a way of letting her know that I'm into her so she wouldn't come off that way and we could just talk and not act crazy lol(b/c I'm super shy).

Bosco · 5th Oct 2011, 10:30 AM

It really depends on the situation.
I can definitely understand the 'chase' theory and I've had that happen to me too many time to count.
But I also feel like I'd could be won over by someone who was really clingy and expressive of their emotions towards me. I mean, what's not to love about someone who's truly in love with you and isn't afraid to show it?

IsItSo · 6th Oct 2011, 05:19 PM

Never experienced this so... no.

sanguine · 6th Oct 2011, 08:49 PM

ive experienced this and its not attractive, all because its the wrong sex DAMMIT! ive only gone crazy for one guy who sent a heck of alot of message my way if you know what i mean, but that's all over now, i think chasing someone who you are strongly attracted to on an emotional level is real romantic, up until the point where it just becomes pathetic, suicidal and stalkerish

then it just becomes sad

3rd Oct 2011, 10:55 PM	#1
Rooni321 EC's Hopeless Romantic Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: gay, str8, bi Out Status: Out to everyone Location: San Francisco, California <3 Age: 17 Posts: 1,321 Join Date: Oct 2011	not exactly important but... Does anyone else get kind of turned of when a girl (or guy) is super obvious that they want you that it comes of desperate-ish? For example; There's this girl at my school who keeps looking at me and smiling and stuff and I'm okay with that because she's really hot. But then every time she's near me she starts getting loud with her friends and starts booty jiggling and booby poppin everywhere and it seems like she's doing it for attention. But its slightly negative attention. Idk I hate seeming so judgemental! Maybe that's just how she is but its really a turn off. Ugggh What do y'all think? __________________ "The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places. But those that will not break it kills. It kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially." Ernest Hemingway

5th Oct 2011, 04:34 AM	#2
Lenny Newbie Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Some people Location: Harare Posts: 5 Join Date: Oct 2011	Re: not exactly important but... Well you know that saying 'Love is blind'? Peeps tend to become a bit erratic when they are overwhelmed with a strong emotion...from her perspective she probably thinks she looks awesome! If you ever have a quiet moment with her just point it out...but in a funny relaxed sort of way..it will break any awkwardness and she'll be more aware of it in the future... __________________ "There is no guarantee that the universe will conform to our predispositions." -Carl Sagan

5th Oct 2011, 04:39 AM	#3
maverick let watchers become warriors Full Member Gender: You tell me. Orientation: Hey good lookin'. wink Out Status: It's pretty obvious. Location: Alabama cue banjos Age: 26 Posts: 2,118 Join Date: Nov 2010	Re: not exactly important but... Desperation is a turn-off to me, yes. I like it when people are relaxed and self-confident, because a) I'm attracted to laid-back personalities, and b) being around calm people helps me to be calm. __________________ Shelter me oh genius words, just give me strength / to pen these things, and give me peace to well her wings / and oh, oh carry on, all you minstrels of the world, we will catch our lady's ear, we will win for us the girl.

5th Oct 2011, 09:41 AM	#5
Sharkattack2222 Member Regular Member Gender: Male Posts: 43 Join Date: Aug 2011	Re: not exactly important but... To me, it seems like people are attracted to the things they can't have, or the things they need to work for. There's something about "the chase" that keeps us excited and wanting more. When people throw themselves on me and act desperate, it really affects how I feel about them and it isn't very attractive. The only time it doesn't bother me, is if it's someone who I was already interested in before I found out they were interested. Although on the other hand, when "we" are the ones being chased, the person who is into us will want us even more if we don't act interested because "they want what they can't have". Does that make sense? It's a vicious cycle. So yes , desperation is a turnoff for me . If I was attracted to the person beforehandthough it might change how I feel about it

5th Oct 2011, 10:07 AM	#6
Rooni321 EC's Hopeless Romantic Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: gay, str8, bi Out Status: Out to everyone Location: San Francisco, California <3 Age: 17 Posts: 1,321 Join Date: Oct 2011	Re: not exactly important but... Actually that makes a lot of sense! I went through a lot to chase this girl only to find out that she was straight and a bitch. But I just wish there was a way of letting her know that I'm into her so she wouldn't come off that way and we could just talk and not act crazy lol(b/c I'm super shy). __________________ "The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places. But those that will not break it kills. It kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially." Ernest Hemingway

5th Oct 2011, 10:30 AM	#7
Bosco kukukuku Full Member Gender: Male 男 Orientation: Boys make my knees weak Out Status: A few people Location: eh? Age: 19 Posts: 269 Join Date: Jul 2011	Re: not exactly important but... It really depends on the situation. I can definitely understand the 'chase' theory and I've had that happen to me too many time to count. But I also feel like I'd could be won over by someone who was really clingy and expressive of their emotions towards me. I mean, what's not to love about someone who's truly in love with you and isn't afraid to show it? __________________ .: ♪ :. I tried to be 'perfect'... it just wasn't worth it

6th Oct 2011, 05:19 PM	#8
IsItSo EC Addict Regular Member Gender: Male Orientation: 同志 Out Status: A few people Location: New York-ish Age: 18 Posts: 771 Join Date: Apr 2010	Re: not exactly important but... Never experienced this so... no.

6th Oct 2011, 08:49 PM	#9
sanguine a cow Full Member Gender: cow Orientation: cows Out Status: i dont care Location: Sydney Australia Age: 18 Posts: 447 Join Date: Sep 2011	Re: not exactly important but... ive experienced this and its not attractive, all because its the wrong sex DAMMIT! ive only gone crazy for one guy who sent a heck of alot of message my way if you know what i mean, but that's all over now, i think chasing someone who you are strongly attracted to on an emotional level is real romantic, up until the point where it just becomes pathetic, suicidal and stalkerish then it just becomes sad __________________ The most pathetic person in the world is someone who has sight but has no vision. Value yourself. The only people who appreciate a doormat are people with dirty shoes Last edited by sanguine; 6th Oct 2011 at 08:51 PM..

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