How do you make friends? - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered people coming out

SammieG16 · 17th Oct 2011, 05:59 AM

In really life, i wouldnt say i'm hard to get along with, though i'm totally not blessed with many friends, but on EC its hard to make friends it seems since regular members can't PM it's hard to actually get to know someone at all, just from a couple opinions they post on a couple forums.

**Rosina** · 17th Oct 2011, 06:23 AM

What I do to make friends and get to know people was this: I just read around threads that are interesting to me, finding a post that a member wrote and if they sounded interesting, or had an unusual picture or whatever, I go to their profile, read up any bio that they've written and strike up a conversation on their walls. I still do this as a Full Member and Mod. It's a nice bonus if the chat room's active to meet people in real-time but other than that, it's still the same process of initially getting to know people.

I've never really found that any members on here that don't wish to talk; everyone's friendly and feels the same way as you, they just want to chat and make friends, but it takes one person to initiate that contact

SammieG16 · 17th Oct 2011, 06:47 AM

it's always been hard for me to just strike up a random conversation. Dont get me wrong, i love voicing my opinion, i just cant start it of some reason it seems.

Rinto · 17th Oct 2011, 06:57 AM

I never found myself too comfortable with EC myself, to tell you frankly. But I try my best to stay enjoyable and in touch with others even if I still don't get that much attention. ^_^

Nazo · 17th Oct 2011, 08:30 AM

It takes a while.
Just keep posting, maybe once in a while go to somebody's profile and comment on something they said in a thread, or talk about a common interest they have labeled on their profile.
And I don't know about anybody else, but I rarely use the PM service.

adam88 · 18th Oct 2011, 06:15 AM

I prefer to lurk a bit and just answer threads when I feel I have something to add to help the OP or further a discussion. I've never really seen forums as a place to make friends, though there have been exceptions in the past.

Danielle · 19th Oct 2011, 04:07 AM

DarkClarity · 19th Oct 2011, 08:32 AM

I wish I knew how.

Davo · 19th Oct 2011, 11:26 AM

Just keep reading topics and replying to posts. Once you've done enough of this you can apply to be a full member and then make PMs if you want, or you'll have made enough of a mark on these forums that people will recognise you, can respond to things that you have said in your posts and friendships can start from there.

I hope that helps. Don't really know why I'm offering advice - 1. I don't post often, I've been around for a few years and do read a lot of the threads but don't often say things because usually someone has said it before, 2. I appreciate others form friendships through these boards but thats not happened to me and it doesn't bother me, i'm just here to give advice where I can and 3. I'm not very good at making friends in real life, far too shy for that.

17th Oct 2011, 05:59 AM	#1
SammieG16 ClosetCreeper Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Bisexual Out Status: Whoever I chose to tell Location: Michigan Age: 19 Posts: 78 Join Date: Sep 2011	How do you make friends? In really life, i wouldnt say i'm hard to get along with, though i'm totally not blessed with many friends, but on EC its hard to make friends it seems since regular members can't PM it's hard to actually get to know someone at all, just from a couple opinions they post on a couple forums. __________________ I Love. I Love who I fall in Love with, and I Love them truly and completely. If God has a problem with that, then he's no God of mine.

17th Oct 2011, 06:23 AM	#2
Rosina An Abnormal Default EC Moderator Gender: Female Orientation: Straight Out Status: As out as the next straight kid Location: Surrey, UK Age: 19 Posts: 4,103 Join Date: Sep 2008	Re: How do you make friends? What I do to make friends and get to know people was this: I just read around threads that are interesting to me, finding a post that a member wrote and if they sounded interesting, or had an unusual picture or whatever, I go to their profile, read up any bio that they've written and strike up a conversation on their walls. I still do this as a Full Member and Mod. It's a nice bonus if the chat room's active to meet people in real-time but other than that, it's still the same process of initially getting to know people. I've never really found that any members on here that don't wish to talk; everyone's friendly and feels the same way as you, they just want to chat and make friends, but it takes one person to initiate that contact __________________ Hang in there, because things have always and will always change - It Gets Better Rebecca Drysdale

17th Oct 2011, 06:47 AM	#3
SammieG16 ClosetCreeper Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Bisexual Out Status: Whoever I chose to tell Location: Michigan Age: 19 Posts: 78 Join Date: Sep 2011	Re: How do you make friends? it's always been hard for me to just strike up a random conversation. Dont get me wrong, i love voicing my opinion, i just cant start it of some reason it seems. __________________ I Love. I Love who I fall in Love with, and I Love them truly and completely. If God has a problem with that, then he's no God of mine.

17th Oct 2011, 06:57 AM	#4
Rinto Balance Freak-ish Full Member Gender: Monsieur Orientation: Bisexual Out Status: My chosen people Location: Philippines Age: 16 Posts: 480 Join Date: Jul 2011	Re: How do you make friends? I never found myself too comfortable with EC myself, to tell you frankly. But I try my best to stay enjoyable and in touch with others even if I still don't get that much attention. ^_^ __________________ Be happy with who you are. When all else abandon you, at least, it's the being who'll love you the most more than yourself. So, never lose your smile.

17th Oct 2011, 08:30 AM	#5
Nazo Janis Ian's Lesbian Crush Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Facebook, not hiding at college Location: Michigan Age: 19 Posts: 2,071 Join Date: Dec 2010	Re: How do you make friends? It takes a while. Just keep posting, maybe once in a while go to somebody's profile and comment on something they said in a thread, or talk about a common interest they have labeled on their profile. And I don't know about anybody else, but I rarely use the PM service. __________________ are you feeling like a prisoner are you living life the way you want giving time to ones you love are you giving time to who you are

18th Oct 2011, 06:15 AM	#6
adam88 EC Addict Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Pansexual. Or bi. Same thing. Out Status: Yes. Location: Toronto, Canada Age: 30 Posts: 797 Join Date: Nov 2009	Re: How do you make friends? I prefer to lurk a bit and just answer threads when I feel I have something to add to help the OP or further a discussion. I've never really seen forums as a place to make friends, though there have been exceptions in the past. __________________ --Brendan A coming out is never late, Frodo Baggins. Nor is it early. You come out precisely when you mean to. -not Gandalf

19th Oct 2011, 04:07 AM	#7
Danielle EC Addict Full Member Gender: Transgender - MtF Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: Most people Location: NSW, Australia Age: 19 Posts: 525 Join Date: Aug 2008	Re: How do you make friends? __________________ Homophobia is gay.

19th Oct 2011, 08:32 AM	#8
DarkClarity Just a miserable pile of secrets. Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Kinsey 4 Bisexual. Out Status: Not out at all Location: England, UK Age: 17 Posts: 1,025 Join Date: May 2011	Re: How do you make friends? I wish I knew how. __________________ I'm not a human being. I am merely a product of capital. I solely exist to carry out the will of capital. I will work, comsume and die all in order to preserve the status quo, to preserve inequality, famine, poverty and injustice, to preserve individualism and materialism, to preserve Capitalism.

19th Oct 2011, 11:26 AM	#9
Davo Is mise Daibhidh Full Member Gender: Male Orientation: Gay Out Status: Almost out to everyone Location: Scotland Age: 25 Posts: 434 Join Date: Sep 2007	Re: How do you make friends? Just keep reading topics and replying to posts. Once you've done enough of this you can apply to be a full member and then make PMs if you want, or you'll have made enough of a mark on these forums that people will recognise you, can respond to things that you have said in your posts and friendships can start from there. I hope that helps. Don't really know why I'm offering advice - 1. I don't post often, I've been around for a few years and do read a lot of the threads but don't often say things because usually someone has said it before, 2. I appreciate others form friendships through these boards but thats not happened to me and it doesn't bother me, i'm just here to give advice where I can and 3. I'm not very good at making friends in real life, far too shy for that.

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