I have another accepting and supportive person in my life besides my parents an family.I have an older brother Jacob the fully accepts I am lesbian and he is fully supportive.He did hear from my parents that I came out and came into my room to see me and we talked.He told me this:I am your brother and I still love you as my sister.He had a friend and co worker at work at my parents place,this was a year ago and I tackled him because he said something offensive to me.My brother did warn him and told him do not ever mess with me at first.I held him so tight that he said "truce" finally.But his friend friend and co worker knows not to mess with me and watches what he says now.
I've found in the last 19 years of my life (almost 20 now), that the best way to overcome offenses is giving them the cold shoulder. They can't stand that what they say to you doesn't affect you. And furthermore, if you are a little critic, and quick to find other people's flaws, you can use them as weapons, so in addition to not being affected by what they say, you can have a nice comeback to let them know that you are not stupid... btw, brothers are extremely important, perhaps even more important that parents themselves... they will always be there, so make sure your relationship with him is strong. And just hang in there, there will always be people who judge you and who aggravate you, the best way of getting revenge is having a great life and being happy.
I let this get to me at first too. I am an activist, very out-spoken and will be first to stand up for me many cause, but when I first came out to a few girls a couple weeks ago...there was too much ignorance, Some of the lighter comments were: "Michael, stop lying to yourself." "Boo, we're gonna fix you." "You are too cute a man to be wasted on some f$%#" It only got harsher and crueler from then. So much ignorance, that I took it all in, swallowed it, and ran away from it all. I ran back to my dorm parent's apartment, who fortunately is gay, a God-send, and the first person I came out to. He made me realize this was so unlike to take all this in. Me, the so-called "Divine Voice" at my school, was just spoon fed so much ignorance and I just swallowed. He helped me realize a lot and that I need to confront this ignorance just as I have gracefully confronted all other ignorance on campus. In fact, I wish he could be my brother so I could have his guidance more often. Just imagine a gay, chubby, ultra-flamboyant Harvard grad with glasses, someone I'll never be attracted too, but has been great guidance. I agree with goratrix, but also say that you should confront just as you would confront any insult or attack on your family/race/gender/religion. The only difference when you are just coming out, as I felt, it is still a relatively new piece of identity, and you don't so much as have that pride or long-term acceptance of it as you do any other part of your identity.
My bro is very important to me mainly because he is one of the main reasons i am gay because he was the first guy i had sexual relations with. And he excepts me for who i am and has always supported me.
Again brit, read my post in the poll about brothers. I have 5 brothers who all support me, as i am the youngest out of all my brothers AND sisters.
Hey, NicholeAG! I wanted to post here when this thread was new, but I forgot to do so. I'm glad for you that you have so many supportive people in your family! Family members, for people like me, are definitely not the first ones to come out to. And even in a liberal society, my homosexuality is not always acceptable. But sticking to the family, I know my parents would have a REALLY difficult time if they ever knew about my homosexuality. I'm only out to my brother and older sister, and they themsevles had trouble accepting my homosexuality a year back. They're better with it now, but my little brother especially has trouble talking about it still. I agree with Goratrix, keep your relationship strong amoung your family members, because besides from homosexuality, that's what really matter and is the most important. *hugs to NicoleAG* ~~LowestVocal017~~
