I was wondering if anyone else has been in this sort of situation. My friends make plans in front of me all the time and I just stand there awkwardly like "Okay, I'm right here..." It's not like I'm dying to go with them, it's not that. It just hurts to feel invisible around your own friends. If they want to make plans that don't include me, why don't they wait until I'm gone? Why must they do it in front of me? Anyone else been there? How do you cope?
Yap, it happends over here all the time, as you Im not really into going with them but it doesnt feel that nice to be left out either.
I still haven't found a way to cope with that but it happens a lot on my end as well. Its so degrading, like why are they friends with me? ---------- Post added 22nd Dec 2011 at 11:33 PM ---------- I still haven't found a way to cope with that but it happens a lot on my end as well. Its so degrading, like why are they friends with me?
It only happens to me when my friends know that they'd be doing something I wouldn't be interested in anyway...
I used to have a friend like that in the past everytime i hang out i would invite him to come out and on the flip side he would never ask me to hang out with him. And when i confronted him he said i was being needy. You know who your friends are, If they are doing it often they maybe u stop being their friends. Thankfully the friends i have always ask me if i want to come even if it doesn't interest me its still nice to hear them ask me.
Sometimes, people think that you must know you are invited, since you are standing there listening to them talk about it. They may not think a direct invitation is necessary. Next time, try assuming that you are invited along. The either won't mind, or they will stop making plans in front of you when they don't mean for you to come along.
I haven't had that problem. When they make plans I am included. They don't make other plans in front of me.
Most of the time I've had friends make plans when I'm not around, but sometimes they'll mention events in front of me (seemed more prevalent in high school though) where I wasn't explicitly included. When you get older though, there are new friend dynamics that evolve where you still get left out (e.g. your friends spend ALL their spare time with a significant other, or friends that are partnered up/married only hang out with other couples). However, there are some that I know are true friends who don't fall into these categories and will make time to hang out with me regardless of their other relationship statuses.
