Boys >.<

[caughtbywitness]

It had never bothered me until more recently, but I'm getting fed up of the fact that I can't talk to guys easily. I know it's pretty natural, as straight guys find it impossible with girls (something I can do without a moments hesitation and was very useful when I was younger). But now, I can't even talk easily to guys I'm seriously not interested in either, and it annoys the hell out of me, because I come across boring. Everyone says I have great social skills; I have spoken to quite a few famous people (or at least people who are in the public eye) and it comes naturally; I get away with taking the absolute piss out of quite a few of my teachers too, but boys of my own age, wtf.

WHAT DO I DO GUIZ?

[summersforecast]

It's pretty generic advice but the only way you can get better at talking to guys, is by talking to the. All the awkward moments you endure won't make a difference later on, so think of this as just another skill you're supposed to work on.

[BudderMC]

Could it be an issue of being comfortable with your sexuality kinda thing? I mean, I've got the same thing going and for me personally I feel like it's because I'm not completely comfortable with my sexuality (nor am I completely out). Then again, I have more difficulty speaking with guys I'm not out to either (which isn't your case) so...

Maybe it's an issue of feeling like you have something to prove, by being gay. Or you're secretly interested in them.

I echo the above though, there's nothing really to do besides practice. Work your way into it by talking in groups of guys and girls, so you're more comfortable, and then whittle your way down to just guys?

[Mad Man L]

You could feel uncomfortable due to 'sexual tension' or the fact that you just feel awkward about the whole thing.

[J Snow]

Hmmm, what's interesting is I used to be really shy around girls until I came out about my sexual orientation. Now I'm just like, "by the way I like penis!" and I just chat chat chat with them and I love it.

Honestly I've been dating the same guy since I came out, so I guess I really haven't had to deal with the kind of shyness you are talking about. I do not feel very comfortable opening up to guys though. With girls I'm an open book for some reason.

I completely understand what you're going through as I'm sort of like that as well. I can talk to any girl without hesitation but talking to a guy that I'm somewhat interested in is sort of difficult. However, talking to guys that I'm not interested in is easier but I don't normally talk to a lot of guys since most are very uninteresting in my opinion. If you really want to talk to guys, just be yourself and if they don't like it, then they're not good enough to be a friend of yours.

[nerdvain]

It seems like a pretty normal teenage quandary: getting tongue-tied talking to men/women.

I'm the same way. Teachers? Absolutely. Any other peers? Any damn day.
A guy a find attractive?
"Ermraafkeakoeapslkfpkjf."
Nooooooooope. Can't do it.

It's really what Summersforecast said. One only need buck up the courage to talk to these men. Dealing with the issue directly is the most...well, direct way to eliminate the problem. The most that can happen is he turns out not to be a nice person.
But I know, it's a lot easier said than done.
;_________;

[caughtbywitness]

Originally Posted by BudderMC

Could it be an issue of being comfortable with your sexuality kinda thing? I mean, I've got the same thing going and for me personally I feel like it's because I'm not completely comfortable with my sexuality (nor am I completely out). Then again, I have more difficulty speaking with guys I'm not out to either (which isn't your case) so...

Maybe it's an issue of feeling like you have something to prove, by being gay. Or you're secretly interested in them.

Interesting, could easily be right there. I'm not really out but if anyone asks seriously I tell them without pause. I guess I'm probably interested in them slightly, but to myself I'm happy just conversing anyway; and I can't do that. Still, I am fine with my sexuality, but I don't want to be that camp stereotype, I'm constantly checking what I'm doing.

Originally Posted by J Snow

Hmmm, what's interesting is I used to be really shy around girls until I came out about my sexual orientation. Now I'm just like, "by the way I like penis!" and I just chat chat chat with them and I love it.

Honestly I've been dating the same guy since I came out, so I guess I really haven't had to deal with the kind of shyness you are talking about. I do not feel very comfortable opening up to guys though. With girls I'm an open book for some reason.

Ah, I don't open up to anyone. I'm always the one there left standing when things go wrong. I'm not sure why, but i find it impossible to tell people things they could use against me, I don't trust anyone fully :S

Originally Posted by Suracis

I completely understand what you're going through as I'm sort of like that as well. I can talk to any girl without hesitation but talking to a guy that I'm somewhat interested in is sort of difficult. However, talking to guys that I'm not interested in is easier but I don't normally talk to a lot of guys since most are very uninteresting in my opinion. If you really want to talk to guys, just be yourself and if they don't like it, then they're not good enough to be a friend of yours.

Hmmm yeah, exactly, most of them are boring creatures :P. Copied by the fact I don't enjoy any of the common grounds; xBox, CoD etc. Kinda leaves me with little to say if they're the chavvy guys that got to my state school. End up talking about school stuff >.<

Originally Posted by nerdvain

It seems like a pretty normal teenage quandary: getting tongue-tied talking to men/women.

I'm the same way. Teachers? Absolutely. Any other peers? Any damn day.
A guy a find attractive?
"Ermraafkeakoeapslkfpkjf."
Nooooooooope. Can't do it.

It's really what Summersforecast said. One only need buck up the courage to talk to these men. Dealing with the issue directly is the most...well, direct way to eliminate the problem. The most that can happen is he turns out not to be a nice person.
But I know, it's a lot easier said than done.
;_________;

Sounds pretty much what I'm trying, but like I said, I don't really share many of the same interests with them >.<

[Elven]

I remember someone saying you should imagine everyone else is naked if you feel in a tense or nervous situation, personally, I would probably feel even more awkward but hey, it might work for some people.

[Azza]

Talking to a guy I fancy always makes me feel really boring because all the random stuff I usually spew out completely goes out of my head and I'm like "How's about that weather!"

I have a few guy friends and find it really easy to talk to them but I was friends with them before the whole puberty sex thing so I see them in a more "brotherly" way. I don't usually talk to a lot of guys though they usually act like t**ts when there in groups

Originally Posted by Azza

Talking to a guy I fancy always makes me feel really boring because all the random stuff I usually spew out completely goes out of my head and I'm like "How's about that weather!"

I have a few guy friends and find it really easy to talk to them but I was friends with them before the whole puberty sex thing so I see them in a more "brotherly" way. I don't usually talk to a lot of guys though they usually act like t**ts when there in groups

Well, that's to be expected the more people there are in a group such as in a riot. It's very similar to the bystander effect if you know what that is. People are more likely to take risks when they're in a group when individually, they wouldn't do such things.

[IanGallagher]

I'm shy. I don't really get the uncomfortable about talking to guys part. For me, that is what happens with girls. I lean more towards girls. What I thought I'd add however is that I worked within a top film studio where I saw celebrities a lot - I even carried on conversations with them without a problem while the rest shied away. I guess internally there may just be a difference. People your age, you feel like they're judging you and you want to be seen in a proper light by them. While authorities or those older than you (such as these celebrities I'm mentioning) it's a lot more... there's no real pressure there due to the age difference.

[DoctorWho]

I sorta have that problem. The guy I like I used to be able to have conversations with him but now I find I am talking less to him. I really wish I could because he is a really great guy and I used to have excellent conversations with him

[LivingLife]

This would sound mean but Suck it up! When you want to talk to someone do it, even if u make an absolute fool of yourself it doesn't matter atleast you tried and learn from your mistakes and do better next time, Live your life to it's fullest Goodluck
And don't worry i was same as you, I used to go walk in and say Hi and he goes hi back and the conversation completely crashes but now I'm getting better :P

[JoshB]

I seem to kind of the same. I can get in front of a group of people are present a project I've been working on for a year with out a problem or even a lesson for a class (which I have to do on Tuesday), but, kaboom, all of a sudden there's a guy I want/need to talk to, I get shy. However, the best thing you can do is push yourself to talk to these people, these guys, and it'll eventually get better, at least I feel like I have gotten better.