How has coming out improved your life?

[IanGallagher]

Improvements:

- More confidence, which led into being:
-- Happier.
-- Better luck with girls somehow than before.
-- More healthy, I used to have a waist line - now I'm more fit and becoming muscular.

I basically look nothing like I was a year ago emotionally or physically. The confidence it gave me has increased a lot of things. I wouldn't go to the gym before, partly due to being hesitant about being around that many guys, so I became an ectomorph hiding my true mesomorph form - now I go all the time and oddly enough... girls catch my eye and guys rarely do in there, despite what I thought would happen in there before.

Basically just - CONFIDENCE.

I'm a much stronger, better me. How has it improved your life?

(Just thought a forum like this may aid those questioning about coming out, to also see the positives it can have and bring)

[summersforecast]

More sex. Also I can now rock a corset and skirt when I feel like it,

[unrareod]

Coming out gave me the power to realize all of my hopes and dreams could still come true even if it wouldn't be the husband, wife, 2.5 kids scenario. 2 women can be in a committed relationship, buy a house, raise children, and be a happy healthy family.

It also made me realize I shouldn't care so much about what other people think. Obviously I care about my family and friend's opinions and want them to be happy and proud of me but as for people I don't know....I don't let their judgments affect me AT ALL.

[AngelicDemonic]

Originally Posted by summersforecast

More sex. Also I can now rock a corset and skirt when I feel like it,

you don't have to be gay to be a queen, fyi

Uh. Honestly Im happier.
Yeah I know the whole "you're too young to know your sexuality" argument. But honestly, if 13 isn't too young to know you're straight, it's not too young to know you're gay.

Miigghhhtt have a girlfriend..

Honestly tho the "big" thing for me is just having some understanding/knowledge of who&what I am.

[Jessica816]

Originally Posted by unrareod

Coming out gave me the power to realize all of my hopes and dreams could still come true even if it wouldn't be the husband, wife, 2.5 kids scenario. 2 women can be in a committed relationship, buy a house, raise children, and be a happy healthy family.

It also made me realize I shouldn't care so much about what other people think. Obviously I care about my family and friend's opinions and want them to be happy and proud of me but as for people I don't know....I don't let their judgments affect me AT ALL.

I so very much agree with everything you just said!

[Hollowsoul]

Coming out made me less pissed off all the time other then that I had more negatives then anything

[biisme]

Coming out to others hasn't really done anything for me, besides I say whatever it on my mind now. But, coming out to one's self can open up opportunities never dreamed of.

[Ianthe]

Originally Posted by AngelicDemonic

you don't have to be gay to be a queen, fyi

This is true--but people come out about gender and gender expression too, so, for a guy, wearing a corset and skirt in public is still something that requires being out.

Like IanGallagher, I am vastly more confident since coming out. And, similarly, this has also led to me being more attractive to men--I get hit on by men more than I ever have in my life, which is not necessarily a good thing in itself as I'm a lesbian, but I think it's because I'm more confident and open. (I was kind of closed-off before.)

Most importantly, I feel a lot more connected to everyone in my life, because they know me for who I really am. All of my relationships are a lot more rewarding and satisfying.

[AngelicDemonic]

Originally Posted by Ianthe

This is true--but people come out about gender and gender expression too, so, for a guy, wearing a corset and skirt in public is still something that requires being out.

...dur. I forgot about that.

[midwestgirl89]

Coming out to my friends in the Gay-Straight Alliance has improved my life a lot. I'm more confident with my sexuality and I know now that it's totally okay to be gay. And coming out to my friends in the GSA has given me the courage to talk to my mom about being gay. I came out to her like 7 years ago but I never wanted to discuss it further. Now, I can talk to my mom somewhat without freaking out.

This year I started feeling proud of who I am and I stopped hiding as much. I even went to a gay bar and danced! I Before this year I had never danced unless it was a slow dance at a high school thing with a guy I didn't like. I let my guards down and enjoyed life more.

---------- Post added 31st Dec 2011 at 02:16 AM ----------

To be honest, the summer and early fall was the happiest and free-est I have ever felt.

[jargon]

Confidence is the big one! As with ianthe and iangallagher. (weird, two ians?)

Anywho, its a lot easier to act the way I feel like acting now. I had no idea how restrictive it was trying to act like the stereotypical man, trying to impress the girls all the time, etc. until I stopped bothering with that. I think I'd be claustrophobic going back in now (and not that many people even know yet!).

Aside from that, so far its made me a lot closer with everyone I've told. Granted, everyone I've told so far has been very accepting. If one of them had turned out to be a complete homophobe, it might be different. But I wasn't sure how all of them would react before I told them, and so far, I've been overwhelmingly happy with the results.

[BudderMC]

Definitely confidence. I'm not completely out, but I can tell to the people I am out to I'm more confident in my interactions, since I'm not hiding to them anymore. It's also definitely brought my friendships closer (so far).

I think just having people I can share with has also allowed me to stop stressing quite so much as when I couldn't talk with anyone about it. This new found time and energy now goes into my schoolwork (or more likely, chilling with friends and playing games).

It is literally just the feeling of having one less proverbial weight on your shoulders. It's hard to describe, but you all know what I mean.

[solarcat]

Less stress, for one.

Now that I'm getting to know myself, I feel like there's nothing I need to hide, so i can be myself. Which also means I don't need to put on some other persona; I can be myself. it's a lot easier to talk to people if I don't have to monitor what I'm saying or how it might sound.

[andersonh09]

I've been a lot happier, I haven't told everyone, but I've become a lot more confident and care a lot less about what others think of me.

[pronua]

I've only come out to one person so far but when i'm with her, now I can point out cute boys like I never could before

[Random Dent]

I'm happier (with myself) and feel like I can be myself.

I'm also starting to love myself again.

[catcherinrye2]

I can be more open to those who know, and I don't have to hide that part of me anymore.

[Bedroom Hymns]

Well, I haven't fully come out... I'm kind of annoyed by people's LACK of responses when I tell them. NO ONE ASKS ME ANYTHING.

[jargon]

Originally Posted by pronua

I've only come out to one person so far but when i'm with her, now I can point out cute boys like I never could before

This happened to me too! After I told my best friend (a straight girl) we got into the habit of comparing our tastes in guys by checking out all the good lucking ones we bump into on campus. Lots of fun! I still like girls, but I've never really felt inclined to caht with straight guys about how attractiv random girls are. Somehow its a lot funner with boys!

[JamesD]

Coming out certainly (eventually) made me a happier, much more complete person. I'm no longer trying to split my "real" identity from me "public" identity. Its so much easier when I don't have to even pretend about a whole host of issues!