Obviously not equally bi, but like the gay side of bi. I think I FINALLY figured out my actual sexuality, but now I have this question that's been bugging me. When people ask me if I'm lesbian (I'm partially out to my school, and it's been going around, so people ask me for confirmation), I don't know whether or not to say, "Yeah," or, "No, I'm bi." "Sort of both, I'm biromantically homosexual," is a bit of a mouthful. And plus, my school would have no clue what that is. I'm guessing it's considered gay, but I just need to be sure. And I don't know whether or not to say bi or gay, because technically I don't think it's bi, but if I say gay then people will think I can't legitimately go out with a guy. So, what do you guys think?
I think that it'd be safest to go with bi. It's much easier to tell any particular guy who would get to that point that you're not interested in guys, than the whole school. I consider myself biromantic, and I came out as bi to most of my school, and to anyone I felt like explaining as biromantic. If you want to go to the effort of explaining it to every single person who asks, I'd come out as biromantic homosexual. If you just wanted everyone to see that you like girls too, and not be confused, I'd just go with bisexual.
I think I'd say "bi and leaning towards girls/guys." That's what I've heard for your identification before, but it's kinda even more of a mouthfull, isn't it?
When you say "biromantically homosexual", I'm going to assume you mean that you're physically attracted only to females (in other words, you wouldn't have sex with a guy), but you can fall in love with both males and females. I'm in the same boat as you, in that I would only have sex with a man, but I can fall in love with anyone regardless of gender, so I don't have to begin this with, "In your shoes..." In my shoes, I just tell people I'm gay. Gay and bisexual generally carry the connotation of "Has sex with people of the same sex" and "has sex with people of both sexes", respectively, so since the latter isn't true for me, I use the former. I wouldn't want to say I'm bi and potentially fall in love with a woman and get her hopes up, only to disappoint her when I don't want to have sex with her; that would probably result in her saying, "But you said you were bi!" For that reason, I don't date women. I guess the most practical way to answer your question is, would you have a relationship with a man? If yes, maybe bi is the label for you; if no, maybe lesbian is the label for you. I say "maybe" because the only person qualified to choose your label is you, because you're the one who's going to have to comfortable with it and wear it with pride.
Bi cuz explaining that might get people asking for a re-explanation or like me, will feel dumbfounded.
Very good point. I just hope if I went with bi, guys who ask me out (and I know 2 that have crushes on me) won't be confused when I say "I'm not really interested in guys." I could really expect a "But you said you were bi!" answer. But you do have a good point. Each part has it's pros and cons, I suppose. :3 It's true that if I came out as lesbian, it would confuse others in a different way. Doubtful. I don't like guys physically in any way. seems legit. exactly. :/ Correct. I see what you're saying (and glad I'm not alone, lol). I suppose I never really thought about that before -- I've just came to realize that the heterosexual relationships I've been in have never really turned out great, lol. but why not gay? is my question :3 Thanks for all the advice guys. If only labels were easier. D:
homosexual has a defined meaning, and that is someone attracted only to people of the same gender. bisexual means someone attracted to both genders. if your only attracted to your own gender, you are homosexual. if you are attracted to both, you are bisexaul. people try to create all these strange areas inbetween, but the reality is that it truly is clear cut. people can choose to not go under a label, but the words dont mean the opposate of what they mean.
Honestly, it doesn't matter at all what you call yourself. The only thing that matters is that you know who you like and that the other person knows you like them. Technically, I guess I would be homoromantic bisexual, but I just simply choose to say "gay" because its ten times easier and I honestly don't have time to explain to everyone exactly who I like and exactly what are the exceptions. All they need to know is that they just have to accept whoever I'm with So, choose the label that you feel most comfortable with. This is what YOU will call yourself so only YOU have to like it. If someone goes "well, technically that makes you blah, blah and not blah" then you can just be like "thanks for the info" and move on
That's really a good way of putting it. Romantic orientation is a completely different axis of the of identity spectrum. Your sexual orientation only determines which sexes turn you on. People who aren't familiar with the existence of romantic orientation often assume it matches someone's sexual orientation, which is where confusion can arise when they don't. But it doesn't change the definitions, which Emberstone summed up very succinctly. So from what you've described, if I had to choose between gay and bi, I'd call you gay. But again, if you told me, "I identity as bi," I'd call you bi, because it's your label, and it's your choice.
You don't sound bi at all. Bisexual would have at least some sexual interest in members of the opposite sex, whereas here as you've said you have no sexual interest in the opposite sex therefore gay.
