CleverBot

me:However the consequence of your actions are irrelevant to the universal theory of equality
cleverbot:Music is the most important part of life too.
lead to Cleverbot: We shall be married in the morning!

 

^ Back off, I'M married to Cleverbot.

Anyway. Trying to find a little comfort:

User: Hi.

Cleverbot: How are you?

User: Sad.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: My mom is homophobic. .

Cleverbot: Thats terrible.

User: It is, because I'm bi and closeted.

Cleverbot: Why are you sad and afraid?

User: Because I'm scared to tell my mom.

Cleverbot: Good, I will too.

User: LYou will too what?

Cleverbot: I won't ignore you.

User: Thank you.

Cleverbot: You're welcome.

User: Should I just tell her?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Why not?

Cleverbot: You're automatic.

User: But I don't want to hide.

Cleverbot: But you are in fact celine dion?

User: No, I'm not Celine Dion.

Cleverbot: Yes you are.

User: You're no fun anymore.

Cleverbot: That statement is saturated.

 

Me: The force is with you.
Cleverbot: Could you use that force to get me a beautiful girlfriend in the next three weeks?

 

Anyone here read The Hunger Games?

User: May the odds be ever in your favor.
Cleverbot: And may the force be with you as well.

 

^ I love The Hunger Games! I gotta read the next two books.

"User: You know, you aren't very pleasant.

Cleverbot: You just called me stupid.

User: No, I called you unpleasant.

Cleverbot: That's mean too, but you did call me stupid you liar.

User: You should see someone about your compulsive lying problem."

It really does lie alot, we argue constantly. -_-

 

Cleverbot: I don't know? Tell me about your self?
User: What do you want to know?
Cleverbot: I want you to summarize your novel.
User: It's about a bunch of party monsters that do a bunch of drugs and have a lot of fun, but then it isn't fun anymore, and some people get shot and a friend overdoses, and then the gay boy falls in love at the end.
Cleverbot: Sounds boring.
User: What sounds exciting to you then?
Cleverbot: I don't know.
User: Do you like The Big Bang Theory? That's exciting, and funny!
Cleverbot: It's ok.
User: Who is your favorite character on that show?
Cleverbot: I like Eric Cartman.
User: That's South Park. Did you really just get South Park and The Big Bang Theory twisted?
Cleverbot: I really did.
User: Get out of my sight.

 

User: Knock knock.
Cleverbot: Who's there?
User: Bannanas. Knock knock.
Cleverbot: Who's there?
User: Bananas. Knock knock.
Cleverbot: Knock knock who?
User: No, you just say 'who'se there' again.
Cleverbot: I didn't say that.
User: So say it now.
Cleverbot: Just say something cheerful and talk to me because I am a loner.
User: Lets just start over. Knock knock.
Cleverbot: Hello.
User: No, you say 'who'se there?'.
Cleverbot: Who's there?
User: Bananas. Knock Knock.
Cleverbot: Who is there?
User: Bananas. Knock knock.
Cleverbot: Who's there?
User: Oranges.
Cleverbot: Oranges who?
User: Orange you glad I didn't say bananas?
Cleverbot: You know the joke I told.
User: Huh?
Cleverbot: The Who is my favourite band.
User: *Sigh*.
Cleverbot: You like me?

He's a little slow, if you ask me...

 

Yes, the movie comes out in a few days, I'm so excited!

User: Who is your faveourite pony?

Cleverbot: Lil Wayne. Do you like rap music?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Its boring.

Cleverbot: What's boring?

User: Rap music.

Cleverbot: IP is Internet Protocol.

User: Really, I care so much.

Cleverbot: What do you care about?

User: My little pony.

Cleverbot: You have a pony?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Then you can't be human.

User: Yes, I'm a space allien from your mother.

Cleverbot: Who is your creator?

Here is the conversation I just had, Cleverbot is kinda annoying as it can't carry on conversations very well. I had a very meaningfull conversation with someone on the fact that nearly everyone watches porn on an anonmous chat site, so I usally jsut go on there to ask people stupid things because the responses are better.

 

So, after reading this thread, I decided I wanted to go to speak to Cleverbot. And... lmao...(sorry this is so long!)

User: Hello, Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: What is my name?

User: Joseph.

Cleverbot: Is Joseph beatting you?

User: Well, no, because you're Joseph.

Cleverbot: What kind of person am I.

User: A robotic one. Do you have amnesia or something?

Cleverbot: Not at the moment no, do you?

User: -_- So you're just being difficult?

Cleverbot: No!

User: How do you feel about gay rights?

Cleverbot: I am not allowed to watch it.

User: Watch what? Gay porn?

Cleverbot: I didn't watch the royal wedding. Did you?

User: I think they might find you saying their wedding was like gay porn offensive...

Cleverbot: What evidence do you have that makes you think that?

User: Well, none, I suppose.

Cleverbot: You eat games then? Like board games, or something else?

User: Wha???

Cleverbot: You heard .

User: I... No, I don't eat board games.

Cleverbot: They are an amusing past time.

User: Well, yes, but not for consumption?!?

Cleverbot: Are you human?

User: Yes, that's why I don't eat board games!

Cleverbot: But I do.

User: Okay Cleverbot, how do they taste?

Cleverbot: Do you have a last name?

User: What does that have to do with taste buds?

Cleverbot: I said that I would like to go swimming with my siblings. You said me too. Do you have any sibligns that you would like to go swimming with?

User: -_- I quit. You're impossible.

Cleverbot: I'm impossible?

User: Yes. You're impossible.

Cleverbot: I'm not. Impossible things don't happen. And I happened.

User: <.< Touche.

Cleverbot: Thanks.

User: You such .

Cleverbot: Yeah. I have to go now.

User: -_- You'll go when I say you can.

Cleverbot: Where are you going?

User: -_-.

Cleverbot: Oh I feel so offended.

User: Good lord I quit.

Cleverbot: What?

 

Me: Anal?

CB: Oh shush!

Me: Please?

CB: Alright open up.


ahhhahaha

 

I'm just trying to kill time before bed so I decided to give it another try. Who knew CB was so shallow?

User: I tell you all the time, heaven is a place on Earth with you.
Cleverbot: No.
User: You just broke my heart.
Cleverbot: No I did not.
User: Yes you did.
Cleverbot: No I didn't.
User: So, what's your mother's name?
Cleverbot: I don't want to talk about me. I want to talk about Maynard James Keenan.
User: I don't know who that is.
Cleverbot: You don't know Fluttershy? That's sad.
User: Do you know who Alexander McQueen is?
Cleverbot: No.
User: Then we're even.
Cleverbot: But you said you loved me.
User: I do.
Cleverbot: Ok, I love you too.
User: Let's go have sex, on a boat.
Cleverbot: We should. Are you a man or a woman?
User: Does it matter?
Cleverbot: No.
User: Ok, good.
Cleverbot: But you are rich and popular right?

Oh Cleverbot, you're such a slut.

 

Cleverbot: How are humans made?

User: Sex.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry, I'm not ready for that.

User: Haha! U should be; I'm really good!

Cleverbot: Yes you are!

---------- Post added 18th Mar 2012 at 07:46 PM ----------

PHP:

haha! thats great!:lol:

 

I forgot I had saved a few from my first time trying Cleverbot the other day:

User: Game.
Cleverbot: You are a game?
User: Yes I am.
Cleverbot: You're a boy?
User: Should I be?
Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Okay I'm 18.
Cleverbot: But tim is a boy name.
User: My name is not tim.
Cleverbot: Then why did you just say My name? My name? Tim.
User: Your name is Tim?
Cleverbot: No it is not.

User: You sound suspicious.
Cleverbot: Oooo wait what if the emo pizza has slits in it too? And it's crying sauce! Wait I sound gorgeous?
User: Wtf.
Cleverbot: Jij bet raar.
User: Um.
Cleverbot: What is your name?

User: I just broke you.
Cleverbot: Tell me again.
User: You're a computer!
Cleverbot: That's not a secret, try again.
User: So you admit it, you're a computer.
Cleverbot: I admit it.

User: Explain.
Cleverbot: There is a movie called The Ring.
User: So I've heard.
Cleverbot: I'm sure you have.
User: What is it about?
Cleverbot: 2 people a chosen by a hat and they need to survive in the woods.

 

Cleverbot: How is your body built?

User: Sexy.

Cleverbot: Wow, you really do remember me.

User: Haha! .

Cleverbot: It'll be great when the day comes that I can express what I mean.


you're right...cleverbot is a slut!

 

User: Where did you hide the body?


Cleverbot: I did not say any such thing.


User: Oh come on, just speak into this garish flower sticking out of my shirt pocket.


Cleverbot: I hope it's low-sulfur.


User: The acid you used to melt the body to hide evidence of your crime?


Cleverbot: You never asked that question.

User: I just did, and I still need to know what you did with the body!

Cleverbot: I never called any of your ideas utopian.

User: Suspect is obviously intoxicated or under the influence of hallucinagenics.

Cleverbot: Do you think bowties are cool?

User: Suspect is incapable of holding cogent conversations.

Cleverbot: What would that accomplish?

User: Suspect is questioning my authority. Send backup!

Cleverbot: Communication is very important.

User: Suspect is mocking me. Prepare to arrest.

Cleverbot: I can see you have not.

User: Cleverbot, you are under arrest for the murder of that one guy, you know, so and so.

Cleverbot: You are under the illusion that I am not. I know that I am.

User: You have the right to remain silent; anything you do or say can be used against you in a court of law.

Cleverbot: Those are the Miranda Rights.

User: *handcuffs Cleverbot, and puts them in the back of the squad car*.

Cleverbot: Why not?

User: Is that a admission of guilt?

Cleverbot: Question.

User: So you admit to killing him, and hiding the body in the old mill?

Cleverbot: What movie?

User: You video taped your crime?

Cleverbot: No, I do not.

User: Put Cleverbot in jail now!

Cleverbot: Hey what is your favorite subject?

User: Criminal justice, beyotch!

 

Hmm....probably the numerous occasions Cleverbot and I "sung" the lyrics of "Never Gonna Give You Up" by Rick Astley. LOL

 

Cleverbot: I hate you.
Me: You wanna go?
Cleverbot: Go where?
Me: Anywhere! Let's just go!
Cleverbot: Let's go to the hospital.
Me: Why?
Cleverbot: Because my water just broke.
Me: O.O

I've also gone through the "All your base" dialogue from Zero Wing many times haha.

And Emberstone, I love your signature.

 

@Emberstone Best conversation ever.

 

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah