"straight acting gay" should be replaced...

I dunno. I mean, I see 'straight acting' as indicative of him not standing out in a crowd (for most cases, not being particularly feminine or flamboyant). To me, someone who was 'manly acting' would also stand out.

I think it fits because if I were to say 'straight acting', I'd mean someone who's pretty run-of-the-mill, boy-next-door kinda guy. Which, since 90% of the population is straight, and the majority of them are average, is rather fitting.

 

I think the term "straight-acting gay man" is stupid. Not least of all because it is a contradiction in terms. If he's/she's "acting straight" then he'd/she'd be hitting on a woman/man respectively to cover up the fact that he or she is gay or lesbian.

 

I'm conflicted about the term "straight acting". I agree that it is a stupid contradiction and plays into stereotypes and, when I see it used, my mind immediately labels that person as being at least a little bit self-loathing. Or divisive. As if to say, "Oh, but I'm not like one of those queeny bitches who swish and limp their wrists and wear Prada." As if there were anything inherently wrong about the latter (well...being a bitch is a problem).

On the other hand, my assumption of self-loathingness is probably just that in most cases. Most people probably just use it as a short-hand so that they don't have to list all of their characteristics. I mean, why say you like to watch football, drink beer, go out with the guys, see action movies, and play sports, when you have the opportunity to say it all in just 2 words? Most people in the world simply don't bother to think about the implications of the words they choose.

Not sure I'd go for "manly acting gay" either. What does "manly" even mean?

 

I guess I would be straight-acting technical terms lol. I love women, I want to fuck girls, lean more that way. Yet I also like some guys, sadly it seems most of the guys are straight - although there was a really cute one at the theater a couple years younger than me that was similarly masculine or more so than a lot of gay guys I've seen here (think he was gay, effeminate glow sorta and kind of stumbled when he saw me lol, that was cute - usually only seen that stumbling from some girls).

 

I see the ease of having a simple term to describe the characteristics commonly associated with straight men, really it does make more sense. When used in that connotation it irritates me significantly less.

 

I don't get the "acting" part. I mean, it's how I really am!

 

acting just means mannerisms or behavior. ANOTHER definition of it is the field. But the more common every day one example is "you're acting awfully peculiar today" for example. The person is in fact acting peculiar. There is no professional acting to make it seem that way. Sorta drunk. Unsure if that made sense. But, yeah - two definitions.

 

On the one hand, "straight-acting" generally refers to gay men that are masculine. By calling masculine gay men "straight-acting," people are reinforcing the stereotype that straight men "are" masculine and gay men "are" feminine.

Because of the "-acting," the phrase suggests that masculine gay men are being disingenuous, or playing a role. "Manly-acting" suffers from the same shortcoming: it implies that the gay man is putting on an act if he is masculine.

"Masculine gay man" is more accurate, because it describes one's gender expression (masculine) and one's sexuality (gay) in two separate words, without any confusing connotations.

 

I dislike the term - it makes assumptions about gay and straight behaviour that aren't at all justified.

Maybe a better term is "not cliche gay"

 

I agree. Maybe there should just be no term for it? Orientation doesn't define gender, does it? If someones gay, they're gay - whether it's a man, woman, 'tomboy' or 'straight-acting gay'.

Ditch the detailed labels I say. We all may as well literally wear labels with huge paragraphs explaining our personalities and the way we act.

 

For me it doesn't matter that much. I know what is meant by straight acting, it is just a way to describe someone. But I can see how it can cause issues.

 

agreed, the term acting is synonymous to pretending, like how an 'actor' plays a role in a movie.

some people are just naturally effeminate, and some not.

and also even though you might agree that flamboyant guys should be treated equally, its another thing to actually act upon treating them equally. Like when you say its personality that matters, but you still chase after athletic straight guys who are probably out of your league, and over look someone whos probably over weight or very very thin

---------- Post added 8th Apr 2012 at 08:08 PM ----------

woops someone else has beat me to the punch oh well

 

When you think about it "gay acting" straight men have the term metro-sexual and no one is really offended by that, maybe we need a term like that for us "straight acting" gay men.
-just a thought

 

yeah your right, but people get hung up on labels so I thought it could be an idea

 

I thought being a metrosexual (gay or straight) just implied that you were someone who really cared about their personal appearance? Hygiene, fashion, etc.

Maybe I'm wrong though.