Bisexuals: do you ever...

My sexuality is a bit unclear, however one thing I experience (which is not exactly the same as you're describing but similar) is a feeling of longing for some kind of clarity. In all honesty I have days where I wish I was completely 100% lesbian because it would make my life so much easier than having to give long explanations to people about what I really am.

I do have days where I feel like I want to be slightly gayer - for instance, I will always dress very slightly more androgynous on a gay night out than a straight one. This partly ties into the feeling that if I go dressed femininely I'll be automatically stereotyped as straight, which bugs me like crazy.

 

I'm still not that convinced of what I am but yes, I do feel like acting/feeling a bit more "gay". I actually am on these kind of days, drowning myself in fictional romantic fantasies with one of my imaginary crushes. *sigh* I guess being loveless for quite some time has its side effects, eh? Haha

 

Sometimes I want to go clothes shopping for hours with a grand in my pocket.

I can act slightly camp under the guise of being 'funny' or a bit theatrical.

I too wish for clarity sometimes, I have a life history of always taking the awkward route (e.g. playing guitar left handed when my dad has a vintage guitar from the 80's...right handed) in many aspects, so it'd be nice to have a this-or-that sexuality.

 

Not really, no.
I do have moments were I wished people were not so focussed on strict gender stereotypes and stereotypical behaviour.

 

all the time. I am bisexual and identify as such, but I often have those "gay" moments and will lean more to girls. lol

 

This would fall under the "Bisexuality is just a stepping stone to homosexuality" argument that so many people make.

If you are truly bisexual (as in you are interested both physically/emotionally in both sexes), why not just embrace your bisexuality?

 

^This^, though I understand people struggle with accepting themselves.

 

I've felt the same way many times. Some days, I'm only attracted to girls, and others, I'm mostly attracted to guys. On the days where I'm leaning more towards gay, I sometimes feel the urge to act more gay and have people know and such. That's probably just because my sexuality is very fluid.

 

in a word, yep

 

Here's my analysis of why you might feel this way:

You are only out to a few people. So, your "gay side" doesn't get to be expressed as much as your "straight side."

I expect that if you lived as a lesbian for a while, you would find yourself "longing to express and embrace your straight side."

My point is, you probably don't feel you have to hide or suppress aspects of yourself that people will think of as straight. So of course, you express them when you feel like it, and don't build up a longing to express them.

If you were expressing all aspects of your sexuality freely, I don't think you would feel this way.

But that's just my guess.

 

definitely.
im more leaning towards women because i have dated men in the past and i now want a relationship with a girl.

 

I'd rather date girls than boys, but most of my crushes are male... go figure. LOL. I do wish for more clarity because it veers horribly from one side to the other. I'm interested in both sexes but the level of my interest varies.

 

Yes, I am expressing my gay side increasingly because I get read as straight too much.