Boys Don't Cry?

many of the differences in sexuality are based on the society stereotypes imo.. as far as how they should act.. Me being FTM, I feel what makes me know I am male, is that I look at myself and feel things missing.. parts missing.. and am always looking.. forgetting I don't have those parts.. But imo, the rest is more stereotypical.. there are very emotional males and very rock solid females.. We are all different and all special in our own way.

 

This is exactly what I do. I haven't cried in front of anybody in YEARS. I don't think this makes me "tougher," I think it makes me emotionally weaker. I get along with my parents, but neither of them are the type of people who show their emotions, so I guess that's rubbed off onto me. And since I'm only out to one friend, the issues that I do cry about aren't exactly the sort of things that I can openly discuss with people I know.

I must appear as an unemotional rock on the outside, but there's always something going on on the inside.

 

meh, you'll get over it.

 

i think it has to do with masculinity and how being masculine means showing no signs of weakness. crying is a sign of weakness. when men show signs of weakness, their manhoods are questioned which means that others will look down on them. sometimes, we care too much about what other people think of us and it shapes us to do certain things that we're not naturally inclined to do such as showing emotion.

 

I wouldn't say that I'm afraid of emotion itself, but more afraid of how it controls how I behave and react to certain things. It causes a smile, a frown and tears, depending on which ones you're experiencing.

I used to cry a lot when I was a child. Yeah, that didn't last long, because nothing really came of it. So "training" yourself not to express your emotions openly can work, sure, but keeping all of it locked up won't do you any good. Your emotions need an outlet through expression. For 15 years, growing up, I've not cried a single tear, then at the beginning of this year I had my emotional breakdown for holding on to WAY too much hurt and suffering. All you need is ONE trigger, and all those walls you've built come crashing down. Luckily, I had a brother to help me through it, so it wasn't a worst-case scenario.

Today - I don't turn my head or suck those tears back through the ducts by sheer force of will, I let them roll - I don't give a damn who sees those escaping drops of emotion, and anyone who has a problem with it can fuck right off.

 

well the last time I cried in front of my dad he told me to shut up and that my problems weren't as bad as everyone else's. So I never cry anymore because I know that if I show signs of weakness, then people will take advantage of me. I lived in an emotionally repressed home, whenever you show emotion in my house, my parents will tell you to act normal :/

 

Lol I'm like a dog I feed off peoples emotions and react with em.. don't believe me? we have a home video of my dad holding me and purposely making sad faces just to make me ball. and after about 30 seconds of doing that he would have a huge smile on his face and I would immediately stop crying and start giggling. so ya I don't really care when or where I cry.

 

Personally, I haven't cried in over a decade. Not because I don't want others to see me cry, or I think it is a sign of weakness, a sign that a lack masculinity (I couldn't care less about that), but because I don't see any reason to. There may be times when I'm watching a sad movie with friends; they're all crying, but I am not, because I don't find any rational reason to cry. That example extends to anything: from being hurt physically or emotionally to finding out someone I knew died.

To be honest, I wish I could cry. I think that it is a great to express yourself, but I just can't trick my body to do it.

 

Okay,so...I'm a woman and so I may be out of place here, but i've been pondering this about myself recently and, honestly, i've discovered that i'm terrified of being vunerable and showing emotions to anyone, even the people i'm close to. I absolutley hate crying in front of people even in the movies and such. So, yeah, i hold it all in. Or at least until I'm alone in my room.. kind of depressing. Now, when I was a kid, I balled quite a lot.

 

For me, it's more than when I cry, I usually want to be left alone, but if people see you cry they immediatly want to console you. Which is a great sentiment of course, but 9 out 10 times I'd prefer it if they waited until I've stopped crying.

 

I'm exactly the same way. I don't know if it was my upbringing or just what I learned from the culture growing up.

Either way, if I am confronted with an emotional issue that could prompt me to tears, I freeze up. I push it down. Sometimes, this is incredibly difficult and hard. There are times when I've failed, and for me - it's a deep sense of shame. I feel exposed and vulnerable.

I was bullied horribly growing up. It wasn't just name calling and threats, at times it was intensely physical - I was pushed down a flight of stairs, for example, and experienced things worse than that. I never cried. It was the only thing that I could control, and I knew that by crying I'd seem weaker and make it worse.

I remember when my grandmother died. I loved her as if she were a second mother to me. I actually got physically sick from holding in my emotions, but no one saw me cry. I bawled my eyes out when I knew I was alone and had time to do it. For two straight weeks. But at the funeral and around other people, I had to remain "strong" - I supported and comforted others, but suffered my own grief silently.

If you want to toss a bit of cruel irony in there, if I were being true to my emotions I'd definitely be a cry-er. I can feel the urge to cry if I watch a sad movie for example, and if I see someone else crying I want to cry along with them. I guess it's because I'm intensely empathetic - when someone else is suffering and in pain I can "feel" it. So, rather than crying along with someone, I try to make them feel better. That way I can feel "gratitude", "love", and "compassion" instead of the emotional pain.

You know, I can actually count the number of times I've seen my dad cry. Twice. Both times was at a funeral - the deaths of his parents. I remember when I saw him cry the first time, with the death of my grandfather, it actually frightened me. I didn't know what to do or how to react. I think I was about eleven years old.

So, I don't know if I learned it from my dad or culture in general. But I do think it's a problem. I don't think it is healthy emotionally, physically, or psychologically.

 

When I was little, I used to cry about EVERYTHING! Until people started making fun of me and I stopped completely. I have since started crying again, but always on my own. The last time I cried in front of others was 5 years ago at a friends funeral. I think society plays a part in this. When we cry others make fun us or tell us "don't cry" (even when they care). Crying has been associated with weakness and we can't afford to be seen as weak. But crying is essential as an emotional outlet in my opinion.

 

Since i was about 12 i made it one of my main aims not to cry in the presence of others because i dislike showing emotion but i certainly do not think crying makes you any less of a man. I have cried a few times recently watching emotional parts in anime and cried a couple of times when i felt a bit down but apart from that i haven't been confident enough to let my emotions show.