Sooo... I'm new.

Well, as the title says, I'm new. My name is Ellie. I'm recently out. And now most of the people I know know that I'm lesbian. I was originally brought to this site looking for a way to come out to my sisters. But I couldn't find anything that helped me in my situation so just blurted it out. So now I'm out to all my immediate family and some extended family. Most of my friends know. But anyway, I'm here to meet new people. so.... HEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! love you all!(*hug*) (im a hugger)

 

So I have requests for my story.. Okay, but remember, when you're reading a long rambling post you asked for it ;P So I started questioning my sexuality in the seventh grade when I developed a crush on my best friend. That was four years ago. I hadn't really thought about it much until two years ago, when I had moved back to my old school and met some new people. My friends were coming out left and right and I thought, 'Okay, if they can do it, so can I' And I came out as bisexual. I started keeping a journal with me all the time and I had become completely infatuated with one of my closest friends. That summer I hadn't come out to any of my family yet and I went on vacation with my grandparents. My pocketbook was laying in the living room and I had my journal in it and my grandma read what was written in it (me talking all about my crush and how I would do absolutely anything for her) to find out who the purse belongs to (because none of the kids there other than me would have had any form of ID in their wallet) and so I was outed to her and her husband. Oh, did I mention that my grandfather is a pastor? Well, they're the very traditional kind of people. And they thought that something was wrong with me so they talked to my dad who told his wife (a therapist) and they put me in therapy on my grandmother's request. I only got out of therapy because I started dating a guy and they thought I was "cured". I knew I wasn't cured because there isn't anything to cure. I was only dating him to try and convince myself that I'm not lesbian. I mean, I had the five year old dream of growing up to be just like my mom and marry someone just like my dad. My mom had found out about me before this whole escapade by reading another of my journals. Now that I think of it, I was outed to my dad that way too..
I, very recently, came out to them as a lesbian. I was stressing about how I was going to come out to my little sisters because they tend to agree with my dad and his parents. (the pastor and his wife) My dad continues to think that I am believing a lie about myself. And he hasn't been very kind about the way he says so. But I finally got a chance to tell them both (my two sisters that are old enough to understand [I actually have three younger sisters, I'm the oldest and the youngest of us is 15 months old]) at the same time when we were cleaning our shared bathroom. I said to them "I have something to tell you but I need to know that you'll still love me for me" and they both started trying to guess what I had to say.. I got frusturated with saying "it isn't that" over and over again so while the older of the two was in the middle of her sentence I said "I'm gay." and the youngest misunderstood me thinking I meant gay as in happy, or overjoyed. So she said "I am too" and I gave her a look that said 'you've got to be kidding me' and I just said "you know what I mean" and she goes "Oh! You mean lesbian?? Then why've you had five hundred boyfriends??" (Remember, she's twelve and twelve year olds tend to overexaggerate things quite often.) Then I explained the part about trying to convince myself I was straight and she just says "oh" and walked away. My other sister claimed she already knew.. I don't know how she found out.. But as long as she didn't freak out I was fine with it. I later told my closest gay friend and he said "My little girl is growing up!!" I busted out laughing. And that is my coming out story as of now.