Teenagers getting hitched

Yeah I see your point there. You'd think they'd wait until they're at least 21, for obvious reasons. Lol- they won't get to drink at their own weddings... xD

 

Well, sometimes I think that it's completely stupid and silly to get married so young.

But then again...for some people, they were meant to be together. So age doesn't matter.

I'm not really sure, to be honest. Only if they've *really* thought hard about it can it be justified. If it's just for fun or spur-of-the-moment, then it's wrong.

 

I agree that it not the best idea... I live in a county where it's really common though. Most of the people my age are married around here because they had kids. There were a lot of girls that got pregnant during high school.

Don't feel bad... I have never really been on a date either. (I don't count the one that I did go on because I walked out in the middle of it because I realized that he was not for me.. freshman year of high school..) I've never kissed anybody either.

Your not hopeless, your just more mature then they are. Most likely, these people cannot even support themselves yet.. but they are getting married. They have that whole "we're gonna love each other for ever" type thing. Most of these marriages don't last...

 

I agree, and I take an extremely negative attitude about anyone getting married before 30. Right now, our economic and educational realities are such that adulthood doesn't even really begin until 22 or 23, and new adults sometimes have yet to learn who they are and what they want. Also, they often times do not have the savings to contemplate a long-term commitment like marriage and especially kids.

 

I'm going to have to respectfully disagree. I think if some people are ready then they're ready. I don't think anyone can determine if someone else is ready. Some people are ready earlier than others. I was always happy for my friends that were 18/19/20 when they got married. The same way I'm happy for people that get married when they're older.

Don't plenty of people live together when they're 18/19/20? Perhaps it was just my group of friends but many people lived with their bf or gf at that age. Sure, they couldn't afford a house but they rented an apartment.

Also, there are cultural differences that may come into account. In some cultures, if you're 25 and not married it is not looked upon favorably (to say the least). I have a friend that is currently searching for a husband. She is 19

I agree that you're not hopeless. There are many people at 19 that haven't been kissed or gone on a date. That doesn't mean it'll never happen. You're going to meet an awesome person one day

 

I would like to know where do you live. Because in most places yesterday, at least outside of eastern countries, people marrying so young has become very uncommon. I'm not very fond of marriage, I do not think its crucial in life, but I understand your frustration of living in a place that's repressive against your sexuality, and therefore not being able to find anybody. When I find a guy whos attracted to me as much as I am attracted to him, maybe we would marry if he really wanted to, if it was legal AND if there was something we wouldn't have be able to do while unmarried, but otherwise I would be really happy living together with someone else without being officially married. Many straight people do that nowadays, so I don't see why not.

 

I have to agree with most of you, it doesn't make sense or appeal to me. Personally, my parents were high school sweethearts and they're still married. I think they're pushing their 35th wedding anniversary. But when I was growing up my mom always told me that getting married right out of high school was the biggest mistake of her life, because she said she never got a chance to do what she wanted with her own life (like go to college) or explore, because she was so wrapped up in my Dad at the time. Maybe I just have an overly idealistic idea of parenthood and love, but once either one of those things enter your life, you have to stop living for yourself and start living for someone else, and I don't see any reason to saddle myself with that kind of responsibility when I have the rest of my life for it. Youth is fleeting.

 

Just because it is 2012 and they're in America doesn't mean people will not do what is traditional in their culture.

Marriage is really important to some people. I see it as a personal preference. They prefer to get married young and others do not. I honestly don't see the big issue. I guess the way I see it is what other people do with their lives is their business. They're adults so they can make their own decisions.

The whole no gay marriage in California thing does suck but that could change in the near future. It looks like we've got a good chance

 

if they really want to do it, then go for it. and i agree w/ castle walls.

but personally, (try not to be offended) i sort of have a indifferent attitude towards the idea of marriage for me. i know for many it's super important & special, but subscribing to the institutionalization of relationships, seems like an utter farce. and i suspect the reason i think this is that, by watching others, it looks like lots of people try to see the world in one person, then if the person ends up hurting the other, or they feel deadlocked in an unhappy situation, their world feels like it caves.

but i realize that for many, it's something that they've wanted for a long time.

 

I see where you're coming from.

I'm on the fence about it honestly. Now, if they were planning on having a baby at that age, yeah no.

 

I also forgot to mention that there are still many people with very traditional values. By that I mean that there are many people that believe that sex should be saved for marriage. That can be a strong motivator to get married young

 

I don't really agree with it. I'm guessing these people are the partyers and slacked off most of the school year. They really have no clue what's going to happen later in life, and getting married will just complicate things. They're obviously not going to college, so I really wonder what they'll be doing to get money.

But don't feel bad. I technically had a girlfriend, but we never had any real dates. It's not terribly uncommon for a high schooler not to date. They're just rushing into things blindly. You still have LOTS of time to find someone. Don't stress, just go with what life brings you!

 

Wow, that is a pretty broad paintbrush you are using there.

I think once you finish high school and want to get married, then go for it. Experience is a fickle thing, you don't get it until after you need it. No one knows what the future hold. 10 years ago I would have no clue I am where I am at today. I am on the verge of making a significant change that 2 years ago I would said no way.

So we have to make the best decisions that we can and hope for the best. If you keep waiting until you are old enough to know better, you'll die never doing a thing.

 

I hope you don't think that I'm attacking you, your opinion, or anything of the sort, musikk021. Like I said, I'm just respectfully disagreeing with a lot of the posts in this thread.

I only mentioned the culture and tradition thing because I was thinking of reasons why people in general may get married young. I wasn't referring to the people that you know. I've been talking about the people that marry young in general.

It is true that people that get married young are more likely to divorce. I just don't agree with people calling others or their decisions stupid because the odds are against them, especially if the outcome hasn't become clear yet. You never know how things can turn out.

Also, out of curiosity, have you ever considered asking them what made them decide to get married young?

 

Don't be jealous. Your marriage will last far beyond their second divorces.

 

Good! It is really easy to misunderstand people when talking online so I'm glad that we can respectfully disagree on this issue.

I don't think you've fallen pathetically behind at all. Like I said earlier, I'm sure you're going to find an amazing person in the future! Having to be patient can suck but that person will totally be worth the wait