Are you submissive or dominant?

In every aspect of life, I'm submissive. I'm quite the doormat, and people always walk all over me to get what they want. I don't like making decisions for other people; even when going out with friends and they ask me where we should go to eat or what movie we should see, I never call the shots. I don't want to be responsible for picking something and having my friends not like it. Then it's my fault.

This actually worries me though. If in the future I actually get into a relationship, I think my submissiveness will get old fast. You know, in the beginning, it just seems like I'm very chill and laid back and just like to go with the flow. Then as time goes on and I never ever pick what we should do or pick where we should go and I make my girlfriend make all the decisions...I don't think that'll work well. It'll become very one-sided, and it can be tiring for someone else to always call every shot. I'm just not comfortable deciding things for other people; I'm okay making decisions for myself, but not when it comes to others.

 

I want equality in the day-to-day, but I'm submissive verging on masochistic sexually.

Yeah, I think that submissiveness in a relationship is boring. It drives me crazy in friendships, because then I feel like the person doesn't trust me enough to state their own opinion. It has the opposite effect of what the person intends, because I feel divided.

 

I'm not a fan of D/S roles outside of the bedroom and I feel uncomfortable with the idea of giving orders or submission outside of a relationship that's meant to fit under the BDSM umbrella, anyway.

I don't mind doing the courting and I do kind of have a protective nature, but generally I'll listen to what my partner needs and structure the relationship around that.

 

As long as you understand why the other person is being submissive, then you can try not to feel so "divided." I know for me, my submissiveness is all with good intention. I want my friends to be happy and to have a good time when we hang out, so I try not to make decisions that could potentially not be fun for them. Part of it is that I really don't mind what we do; I really do just go with the flow. But I just can't bring myself to say, "We should go here or we should do that." I don't want to sound directive and demanding. If you have friends who don't like to state their opinion or who don't want to make decisions for the group, just be understanding and see where they're coming from. Some people are just not comfortable being the leader.

 

I think I am a bit of an odd mix because in most aspects of my life I think that I am certainly dominant, I like to be in charge of things and to have things done my way. When it comes to a relationship though I like the idea of being more submissive, not it the every day interactions, but just in a sexual way. I think it might have something to do with just being able to let go and hand the control over to someone else.

 

I'm naturally just a very assertive person. However, I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone who was completely submissive. It would get annoying making all of the decisions, and I would never want to feel like I'm controlling someone. I need someone to that will push me and tell me when I'm wrong.

Definitely dominant sexually. I'm also the decision maker amongst my friends, which pisses me off sometimes.

 

Can't really say about being in a relationship but with regards to my friendships, I would often be more assertive/put in more effort but I wouldn't really call that being dominating.

With regards to a romantic relationship, I can't imagine being dominant or submissive.

Thing is I'm pretty laid back/care free. I don't think I'd feel that need to be "protected" or the need to feel like my partner was looking after me.

Make any sense? :/

 

I've never been in a relationship, but if I were, I'd want it to be as equal as possible. Outside of the bedroom, being controlled doesn't appeal to me. Sure, if my partner really wanted to go see a movie or something that I wasn't interested in, we could make a compromise. However, I would expect the gesture to be returned if the roles were reversed. In the BDSM sense, I consider myself a switch, although leaning toward the submissive side. That said, sexually dominating a person occasionally sounds hot.

 

I'd say equal... we both have very outgoing personalities in certain situations, and can be very quiet in others- so I'd say we each make up for what the other lacks, and complete eachother well because of this fact.

 

Im not dominant as nobody listens to me. Im a doormat as they treat me like crap.

 

I am kind of a follower, so I guess I'd say submissive. I am not sure the dichotomy makes all that much sense though.

 

I want to say submissive, because I'm a massive introvert, but at the same time, although I can't see myself making the first move, etc, I can't see myself letting someone take full charge after the first few steps. So... submissive yet equal? XD

In general social situations, I'm like, the biggest submissive person ever. Like. EVER. xD

 

social situations im submissive if i dont know the person well/people.
if its someone i know well then its a bit of both.
if its flipped around and the other person is super shy e.t.c then i become the one who is like 'blah blah blah lets do this'.


relationships i honestly dont know. i would say submissive but yet.... ive always been the first one to kiss her lol. no girl has ever kissed me first.... hmm. but in other areas im submissive id say, but then again it all depends. lol.

bit of both overall though id say.
if you asked me when i was 15 i would of been submissive for everything lol.

 

This. Almost exactly.

Also, pretty similar to flyinhernikes. If I'm around people I don't know, I'm, like, really submissive. If I'm around people I do know, it's usually the a bit of both. And when I say know, I mean, like, really know, for a year or two. If I've only known them for a few months, then I'm still fairly submissive.

 

i'm the dominant i guess because i usually am the one in the friendship or relationship to take the initiative. not that i like to give orders, i'm not mean. just usually the first to do something or suggest something. as far as sexually i don't know because i am 15 lol

 

I'm an odd mixture of both dominant and submissive I believe. Back when I was in High School, I was incredibly submissive and quiet - always letting other people tell me what I should do. Now that I've moved out on my own/been to college/done my own thing for almost two years now, I'm way less submissive than I used to be. I'm not a dominant by any means, but I'm totally comfortable making a suggestion to someone I'm spending time with about what we should do.

I guess a good way to describe it is probably a wolf pack structure lol. I wouldn't be the alpha, but there's a good chance I'd be right behind the alpha in terms of hierarchy, if that makes sense.

 

I like to be the dominant one in the relationship. When it comes to sex, I can be either one but I prefer to be submissive.

 

In social situations I'm more of a dom. I like to get my way and me and my friends usually end up doing what I want to do. I don't like to be told what to do, I fight back.
When it comes to relationships I'm the biggest sub there is. I want to be taken care of and I want someone else to take the initiative. Also sexually I'm a sub too. I'm a bottom, I like humiliation, name-calling, and I like to make my partner feel needed. I'm willing to please.

 

In a realtionship I like feeling part of a team. Something a long the lines of helping each other out where the other person is weaker or knows less. I would hate to have a relationship where either person would be submissive or dominant ALL the time. I need someone to tell me to stfu and I need someone to let me have my way at the same time haha xD

In a social situation, I'm naturally more submissive I think, but I have learn to take initiative and take control of a situation when I need to. If there isn't someone clearly leading a situation or the leader sucks, then I step in an take over. I have no problem following and helping a good leader though, and I would actually prefer to do that than straight up leading something.

But then again that is not really sumission and domination. Those terms are rather weird to use when it comes to situations that are not sex related since I don't think anyone here is either completely submissive or dominant in social situation.