School started 4 days ago and yesterday we were making plans for maturation trip. I don’t know is that is a legitimate word in English however my translator couldn’t find a match. Also I don’t know if you have anything similar so I will explain. At end of 3rd grade in high school, every class of the generation (of that school) goes for a trip around Europe. This year we are the ones going and we are heated for a trip with cruiser. Now to the point, after making plans we asked around our class to see who is going. I asked my friend to whom I’m out to if he is going and he asked me whether or not I was. I told him that I am on which he replied “In that case I am not”. I got confused by that and asked why on what his answer was “There’s no way I’m going to feel safe being drunk, on a ship with you”. So, after I trusted you enough to come out to you label me a rapist and can’t trust me. I’m gay, that doesn’t mean that I would fuck every man I see or use anyone drunk enough. But he isn’t the only one who did that. My whole class comments on other gay guy’s from school that way. It’s rather frustrating. Yes I like and prefer man over woman and I am able to love them. No, that doesn’t mean that I like EVERY man or that I find the thought of having sex with one irresistible/uncontrollable urge! In fact I could enter and function in relationship without it. Also, I got offers in the past which I refused because they were from people I barely knew and felt nothing for. SO why the fuck do they feel so threatened about my presence?! I told them everything I just wrote. I’m just so pissed and hate to be looked at from that way, its lonesome, completely incorrect and based on nothing but ignorance towards the matter. Anyone else experienced this type of behavior?
At the risk of sounding, erm, slightly patronising (which absolutely isn't my intention), are you completely 100% certain he was being serious? He genuinely wasn't going to go if you were? That sounds exactly like the kind of banter that goes on between friends of mine all the time, including banter from straight friends directed at gay ones! Maybe it was just meant in that way?
Hi hun. Your friend sounds like a dillweed. For the most pat, high school friends aren't real friends (hehe unless you're me). But your friend doesn't sound like a caring type at all. Better to cut your losses now and get over it. Not only that, but kids are often homophobic at that age. It would be imprudent to open up to others about your sexuality, because odds are they'll react in a similar fashion to your friend. Also hun, since you live in Croatia, bound to be littered with homophobes. Just keep the hope, please. Don't let the bastards get to you.
You get some guys that think they're gods gift to the world and that everybody must be attracted to them and little do they know that is not the case. Just because I'm gay doesn't mean I want to fuck any guy in sight, the same as how a straight guy doesn't want to fuck every girl - they're just very closed-minded and lack the intelligence to process that gay guys are some kind of predators. Just forget about it, they're not worth the thought process. Don't worry though, you will no doubt meet friends that aren't like that. My friends love having bromos.
Outside of school i have many supportive and understanding friends, those iare the one i consider Best/true friends anyway. I was just angry on the way other think of me because before they had doubts about my sexuality i seem as a rather nice kid and no one would ever see me as rapist (is there a better word?). Now, just because im gay they (those who doubt and that 1 i am out to) look at me like im nothing like before. Luckly my true friends saw that I stood the same ^^. Anyways guys thank you for helping me you did awesome job.
People who say stuff like that are simply evil, and you have to write them off as such and just find supportive people to be around. Hopefully, as enough people's perspectives change, the threat of ostracism will make behavior like that impossible.
I wouldn't go so far as to say they are evil; they are just ignorant and lost in the stereotype. And anyway, I doubt he thinks of you as a "rapist". If he is serious at all, it probably just means he doesn't trust himself to not follow your possible lead. Curiosity is a funny thing. So have you spoken since?
Typically when people don't understand someone they try to crush/repress him (may be you're facing it ) . When it doesn't succeed, fear overcome them and they keep away. Whatever happens, as I see it, they are not likely to be good friends after all, if they're really close minded, you'd lose nothing. You've got true friends ^ great! :icon_bigg
That's what I thought he meant! That he didn't trust himself around a gay person. That is upsetting, though! I wish people understood that gay people are not predatory, and that we seek the same commitment (or lack thereof) as straight people do.
I have never actually gotten the "As long as you don't hit on me" response before, but then again... Now that I think about it I have only told one guy not counting my dad (not counting gay guys who I was outed to by friends). I think my response to that would be something along the lines of "I will hit on you as much as a girl would, so you are safe with me."
i'd tell them "wow i find it cute that you actually think i would be at all interested in someone like you, trust me your not even close to my standards and the fact that you think any gay guy in this school would actually be interested in someone like you is a joke at best." but thats just me
