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What is a flirt?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Alexander69, Sep 23, 2012.

  1. Alexander69

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    What is a flirt like I understand what it is but if you sweet talk random people and get personal and make jokes and play around is that flirting? See I guess I have a problem I don't try to be a flirt but some how I come off as one, people at my high school would call me "man slut" write it on my locker call me "slut" cause i would "hit" on people but I wasn't even trying to. That didn't bother me because I was friends with so many people that what people said didn't matter to me at the time because they were just jealous of me but what was a problem was who ever i was talking to (flirting) who ever they were dating would always get mad and jealous at me, *people even went as far as to say I had sex with people when I didn't! So can some one tell me what a flirt is in detail so I know what I shouldn't do! Because now that im out of high school I don't want to do this in real life! Please help!*(!):lol::eusa_doh:
     
  2. Mirko

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    Dude, I think you really need to stop creating all these threads, seriously. You know, usually I have a lot patience with people, and I have an understanding for people who want and need some attention, but you are something else.

    You need to stop trying to get everybody to like you and to tell you that you are good looking, and complementing you on who knows what. It is clear to me that you have some serious underlying issues that you need to deal with.
     
  3. Alexander69

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    Omg why is everyone out to get me some how! Like everyone is being so mean to me! Do you want me to lie about who I am to make you happy at the end of the day? Seriously! I like posting threads I guess you just havnt seen someone who isn't scared to be themself and REALLY themselves on here.... :frowning2: thanks for hurting me :frowning2: in emotionally unstable now and a wreck.
     
  4. Night Rain

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    That was harsh.:eusa_naug

    To Alexander69: Please use punctuation correctly. Long sentences tire me (and many other people).
     
  5. Alexander69

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    I'm sorry haha an I k now that was so mean :frowning2: I'm so hurt literally
     
  6. Fiddledeedee

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    Alex...

    Yes, it was harsh, and maybe it should have been worded more gently. However, seeing as several people have posted similar messages and it hasn't got through to you yet, I reckon Mirko was right to say it again. Your attention-seeking behaviour is a problem -- we don't want you to be dishonest and pretend you don't like attention, since most people do enjoy being pampered now and again, we want you to be honest with yourself and not just us. You need to admit to yourself that it is an issue, and after that we can begin to work on it together. :slight_smile:

    Three of the threads you created, two of which have now been removed, were redundant to each other (as in, they covered the same topic). Making too many threads like this is a problem -- if you made one for general discussion relating to Marco Dapper, Colton Haynes, etc. then that would get more responses and last longer. For now, though, I wouldn't recommend making any threads, because that might help you reduce your urge to. Spend some time looking through this forum about media and see what interests you. If you can get into the habit of contributing to other people's threads -- without making yourself the center or derailing them into a topic of your choice -- then that will help you seem less shallow to other people here.

    Attention should be something you earn, not something you seek; if someone cares about you they may give you attention because they feel you deserve it, and that's a lot more meaningful. When you become close friends with someone you can share experiences and gifts and whatnot, and the mutual attention that you get and give is more healthy. It creates a space where you can give to someone else as well as just receiving, and that makes a longer-lasting happiness for you and the other person. Maybe you should work on deepening your relationships with a few people here rather than having shallow ones with everybody.

    ---------- Post added 23rd Sep 2012 at 12:05 PM ----------

    Oh, and to try to answer the question this thread is technically about: What you describe can be being a flirt; it depends on the attitude behind it. Playing around with friends is just having fun -- sometimes close friends will even pretend to sweet-talk each other as a joke, since they know it isn't serious and won't make people call them flirts. However, acting the same way around people you don't know so well is generally flirting, particularly if your hope is to get noticed rather than just having fun. Does that help?
     
  7. Lewis

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    Calm down. Nobody hates you and nobody is 'out to get you', but it's like you're trying really hard to get people to like you. We're generally a really friendly bunch of people, but we all have our limits. It's rare to see someone sign up and make a bunch of threads within the first five minute of signing up, usually people just introduce themselves and then contribute to threads that have already been created.

    Just try and use your experiences to provide support in other threads or use the 'What are you thinking?' thread to vent things. Again, nobody hates you and just relax a little. :slight_smile:
     
    #7 Lewis, Sep 23, 2012
    Last edited: Sep 23, 2012
  8. King

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    :eusa_clap
    I'm impressed, I've never seen you react that way before.

    As for the question at hand... I'm apparently quite the flirt. Seriously, I flirt with girls all the time. Or so I'm told... I view it as being friendly.
    Flirting generally requires compliments, being touchy-feely, and making a lot of smiley eye contact. If you do things like that, you're a flirt. I do those things, so I am a flirt.
     
  9. Ventus

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    It's unfortunate that you took his constructive criticism that way.

    Posting sad text faces and trying to make people feel guilty out of spite isn't very attractive on any level.
     
  10. Alexander69

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  11. Aielar

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    This is going to sound harsh, but I've seen some of your threads, and some of your responses to other members of EC when they comment on your threads. I haven't seen all of your threads/posts, but some of the ones I have seen...there isn't much point to them (see above - Booo! , etc) and some of them are just plain immature (such as I want penis). This forum is a place for mature discussion, not a playground for children. If you don't want to listen when others ask you to respect the guidelines/etiquette of this forum, then maybe it's best if you move on and find another website. All the best.

    Aielar
     
  12. starfish

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    So it may sting a bit, but listen to Mirko. If you follow his posts he has great advice.

    When you really care about someone you'll whack them upside the head tell them when they are messing up. There are lots off people who will just look the other way, when someone takes the time to offer feedback, be thankful.

    So need to be an emotional wreck. Take a little time, digest what was said. Learn from it, and use it to become a better person.
     
  13. Alexander69

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    I'm going to ignore that since I have not broken any rules here, I'm sorry if you think I'm "childish" but I'm not I'm silly and funny some people can't Handel me :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  14. justinf

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    Not hard enough. Some people need it.
     
  15. Alexander69

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    Not hard enough. Some people need it.[/QUOTE]

    So I assume then "some people" is me?
     
  16. Mirko

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    Alexander, just stop for a second.

    Think about what different members are trying to tell you. Usually, if you have several people pointing things out to you, there is something to that. For you, this is the time to stop and reflect on it. Your last two answers (posts) weren't all that necessary.

    I know you are trying very hard to start changing your ways, keep doing that. Rather than responding with the way you have started, maybe just stop and just take a step back. That, perhaps, will allow you to start answering differently.
     
  17. Aquafin

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    This is a very dramatic page...

    But as far as the flirting goes.. who cares what other people think... don't let that stuff get to you... if that's how you interact with people and it doesn't hurt/bother them... then go for it. But if it does bother the people you actually interact with... I'd cool it down a little
     
  18. Alexander69

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    Thank you I get that what people are saying I get it and I'm trying to change its not going to happen over night all I ask is for you guys to be nicer with your points because it starts to feel like I'm being ganged up on! I don't always deal with criticism well but I will try to listen just don't come off so strong with me please I get angry fast and hurt fast and I can actually black out from being so mad an not even realize what I'm doing so ya please give me advice just be nicer with it if possible ! Thanks :grin:
     
  19. Aquafin

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    Your 17 and out to one friend?

    It makes sense that you want some attn and this may be the only place you can get it at the moment.. I wouldn't take the comments too harshly if I were you. These people are just further along down the road and trying to get you caught up... if that makes sense
     
  20. Alexander69

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    Yes this is the only place i can be me! And that gets me excited and I do go over the top! I'm 17 an graduated and starting to like who I am! :slight_smile: