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Bromances

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by silentdr3am3r, Oct 16, 2012.

  1. silentdr3am3r

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    Alright, so I'm in an iffy situation. I'm in a different country right now and I've met so many people here, it's wonderful. One in particular is a really cute guy who has taken particular interest in me (platonically/romantically, idk!). The first day we met, we kind of just clicked together as friends. I know he's straight (or at the very least is attracted to women) and he just kept on complimenting me the first day we met. The day after we exchange numbers, 99% of my text inbox are texts between us. He's dubbed our relationship as a "bromance", which I'm fine with. I guess I'm just taken aback at how comfortable he is with being physically close. Sometimes he'll take my hand and walk with me. WHen it was raining and we were sharing an umbrella, I thought he wanted to hold the umbrella, but he insisted on clasping his hand over mine while we walked under the umbrella together. And he'll sometimes lay his head on my shoulder (which drives me crazy in a good way).

    The thing is, I'm a seemingly masculine guy and I have no problem just having a platonic relationship with him. But he doesn't know (unless he has gaydar) that I'm gay and because of all the intimate physical actions we share, I'm not sure what to do as it makes me absolutely horny. I just don't want to accidentally read into one of his intimate touching as something romantic and do something that will ruin our friendship.

    I'm at a loss as to what to do. Should I keep on this and try to figure out if he has alternate motives, or try to stay away from engaging in intimate physical contact to keep myself from inappropriately responding!

    This sucks so much. :confused:
     
  2. brocub

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    Tell him you're gay. If he's really a bro, he won't care (or will come out to you if he's not a straight bro). If he reacts badly, he's an ass. Besides, you're in a different country so you won't be there forever.
     
  3. Lewis

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    Bromance's can be great or terrible. I and my best friend have a 'bromance', but I often wish we could drop the b.

    We've spooned and we kiss all the time when we're drunk, but I'm surprised your friend holds hands with you in public...that would make me think he was more than just a bro. I do agree that all these things would drive me crazy too, I often get awkward boners...

    Just tell him and see how it goes :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  4. Olivier

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    He probs won't care if u tell him ur gay! But if u don't feel comfortable just like hint it :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
    And ask him what he looks for in a "relationship" don't say girl and see if he hints at being gay too:stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: btw u too sound really cute :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: the umbrella thing...*casually melting*
     
  5. aeva

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    aybe I don't get it because I'm not a straight guy, but I didn't think they did that type of thing, even in the case of a 'bromance'. I would be pretty shocked if I saw two of my straight guy friends holding hands or cuddling (without it being a joke), and definitely think that there could be feelings there. The situation between you guys definitely sounds flirty (and incredibly adorable).

    I think that, in the least, he wouldn't be upset if you were to come out to him.
     
  6. Hard Candy

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    I think your evidences that this guy is gay or at least bisexual outnumber the ones that prove he is straight. He's probably experiencing the same crisis that you are having, wanting to express to you that he likes you, but being afraid of your reaction as well. You said you're a masculine guy, so that may lead him to not be sure of your preferences. I think he's hoping that you also like men, and since he cannot ask you frankly, he just keeps on dropping hints... wishing that you'll eventually break the ice.
     
  7. Rakkaus

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    What country is this? I think the country and culture and context of what is going on here could make a big difference with regard to what your friend is doing and how you should proceed.
     
  8. silentdr3am3r

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    Well, I'm in Malta right now. But this guy's from Canada, so I don't think European gestures would take into effect
     
  9. tabasco143

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    I believe you should get a drink sometime and then try to open up this topic to him. You don't have to admit you are gay or what, just try to talk about the things you said here, ask him if there is something more or if there is any meaning behind the "physical" touches you share, but talk about it in the most casual way you can. I cannot explain how, you just have to talk in the moment and see how the conversation goes.

    This is very important to do so, because you don't want to be hanging on to something you are not really sure of. At least if you were able to do this talk with him, you'll have your answer: It's either:

    "There is something here" or "This is as far as it goes, we're just really friends"

    From that, you'll then know what to do. Goodluck, keep us posted. :slight_smile: