1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have children?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Alexander69, Oct 23, 2012.

  1. Alexander69

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Sep 20, 2012
    Messages:
    1,862
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    West Vancouver Canada
    I used to want children but now i feel like its so much work! And I feel like people would look down at my kid and me for being gay and having a child. My brother on his old soccer team had a boy who's parents were lesbians and the teams parents were all like "ew his parents are gay and this team allows their son to play on this soccer team?" And "no don't talk to him his parents are .... Lesbians" things like this I would be sitting near them and I hear them all talking and these poor ladies knew what people were saying and how their son was left out a lot and no one talked to him. They would sit away from people because no one talked to them anyways. This has made me not want kids anymore to know how he/she and "I" would be treated?! It's crazy!
     
  2. FashionDisaster

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2012
    Messages:
    81
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Washington
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    Personally I don't want to have children, but I wouldn't be opposed if I was with someone who did. Of course my desire could change as I get older. Anything below 30 seems a little young to be having a child now a days to me anyways.

    As for appropriateness; I think it most definitely is. Being raised in a loving home, whether gay or straight, is the best place for a child to grow. I would put in the caveat that you should take great care in deciding where to live first though. Choosing to live in a more accepting place would bring more stability and hopefully avoid some of the ostracization that you have witnessed.
     
  3. sunnii

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jul 31, 2012
    Messages:
    428
    Likes Received:
    0
    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    i dont want children. i hate them but i hear when you have 1 of your own it's different and i do like the idea of like being closer with someone considering youre having a child togeter but still no i dont want one.

    this will sound stupid but I wish I was kind of a young dad that didnt realise they had a child until I was like 36 and they were 20 or just be a step-parent to someone that already grew up
     
  4. Lexington

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2007
    Messages:
    11,409
    Likes Received:
    11
    Location:
    Colorado
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    I don't even know if I have a reputation to ruin here on EC anymore, but if so, let me try to ruin it by saying this.

    I don't like kids.
    At all.

    Kids barely become tolerable around age ten. Then, as they get more adult, I can tolerate them more. Before that? No thanks. So no, no kids for me.

    But I know gay parents. And if anything, they tend to be better parents, simply because they had hoops to jump through before they could be parents.

    Lex
     
  5. King

    King Guest

    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    Do I like kids? ✔
    Do I want kids? ✔✔✔✔✔✔✔✔✔✔
    Is it appropriate for gays to raise kids? ✔

    I don't see why it wouldn't be appropriate for me to raise a child just because I'm attracted to guys. I'll be an awesome parent. Me liking the same sex doesn't mean I'll be an awful parent. Anybody who says otherwise, straight or gay (I've seen the opinion on EC even), is an idiot.
     
  6. jaysuss

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 10, 2012
    Messages:
    243
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Utah
    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    It is completely right for us to.adopt children. We have all seen.bad same sex parents. Your gender didn't decide how well you can raise a kid. I don't want kids personally.
     
  7. Metleon

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2012
    Messages:
    145
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Pittsburgh, PA
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    I definitely want kids, whether it means by adoption or biologically. Not being straight doesn't mean you'll be a bad parent and being straight doesn't mean you'll be a good parent. I know plenty of straight couples who are down right terrible parents.

    As far as me not being accepted by other parents or my kid(s) not being accepted by the other kids, I honestly think that you're either picking on other kids or getting picked on in school (at least until high school). I'm not going to let my kids pick on other kids, so that pretty much condemns them to get picked on, anyway.
     
  8. PurpleCrab

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2012
    Messages:
    543
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Sherbrooke, QC Canada
    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    The kids/parents being discriminated because of the parents being gay? That's going to happen if you are in a very closed minded place. Some discrimination will occur no matter who you are no matter where you are anyway because there are jerks everywhere.

    That, and I know that gay couples can be just as good parents as straight couples. Sexual orientation doesn't make a difference on parenting.

    By the way it isn't as much work as it sounds. When you love your family it's all very easy. I personally was surprised how easy it was and I regretted not to have started a family earlier in life...
     
  9. Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    I could not possibly agree more. I cannot stand children in the tiniest bit. I never want them at all in my lifetime.

    That being said, why would it not be "appropriate" for gay people to raise children?
     
  10. aeva

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 13, 2012
    Messages:
    749
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    New York
    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    Of course I think it's appropriate for gays to have children. I know several same-sex couples with kids, and they are all fantastic parents.

    However, I don't think I want kids of my own. If it was really important to my wife, I would think about it, but I probably wouldn't have them if it were up to me.
     
  11. gordilocks

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2012
    Messages:
    956
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    glasgow
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    anybody who thinks gays shouldnt have kids is an idiot, js

    and nah, i dont really want kids
     
  12. timo

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2012
    Messages:
    2,904
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    berlin
    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    This, exactly. Couldn't have said it any better.

    Edit: but sure, gay people should be able to have kids, one way or another. It's stupid to think otherwise.
     
    #12 timo, Oct 23, 2012
    Last edited: Oct 23, 2012
  13. stephaniesbaby

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 17, 2012
    Messages:
    53
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Ontario, Canada
    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    I definately want at least one child and just because some people have uneducated opinions, it doesn't mean that sexual orientation should dictate whether or not a child should be raised in that environment. There are plenty of straight couples who shouldn't even be around children, let alone raise their own....
     
  14. Lark

    Lark Guest

    Joined:
    Feb 23, 2012
    Messages:
    114
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    England
    Gender:
    Female
    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    I love kids and I would defs want some of my own when I'm older. Why should my sexual orientation stand in the way of that? :slight_smile:
     
  15. Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    I'm rather indifferent to the Idea of children

    Kids are fun and often adorable

    no one really likes it when anyone misbehaves

    however At the same time that doesn't mean parenting is for me I'm personally looking for a progressive/adventurous life at the moment so kids may not be part of it.
    but if any future partner wants children I probably won't turn him down.

    Also adoption is not a heterosexual privilege.
     
  16. Oblivion

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 9, 2012
    Messages:
    60
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    North East England ~
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    I hate them and I'm absolutely awful with them generally...but for some reason I do want children some day :confused:
    Maybe anyway. I know my current girlfriend is more against them than I so probably not XD
     
  17. Pret Allez

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 19, 2012
    Messages:
    6,785
    Likes Received:
    67
    Location:
    Seattle, WA
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    No, I don't want children, and yes I think that queer folks should be allowed to have or adopt children.
     
  18. Fiddledeedee

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 10, 2011
    Messages:
    955
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    England
    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    I've worked with five- to seven-year-olds in church groups, and met my stepsister when she was nine; therefore, I think my finding them hard to communicate with is justified. I don't wish to have a baby myself, since my skills with them are infamous in my large extended family (you know when people joke about not being able to hold a toddler the right way up? I can't), but I wouldn't mind adopting someone of at least eight or ten if my partner wants children.
     
  19. musicgeek13

    musicgeek13 Guest

    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    I love kids but don't really need to have any of my own. I definitely don't want to birth them! If I end up with someone who has/wants kids, then cool but I personally am happy being the cool aunt to my siblings kids! :slight_smile:
     
  20. Crassus

    Crassus Guest

    Re: Do you want children? And do you think it's appropriate for us gays to have child

    I don't have a strong urge to raise children, but I would be up for it if I were with someone who wanted kids. I need to be surrounded by animals though. I feel like pets take the place of kids in my heart.

    Even though I'm not that into having children, I'm pretty sure that if I did have kids, I would be an awesome parent.